Ordinary World
by PurpleCardi
Summary: Sometimes, the nerdy girl and the tomboy deserve to get the girl of their dreams. A story about what happens after two teenage misfits form an unexpected bond with each other. Rizzles AU set in 1994.
1. The Eighteenth Year Of Life

**A/N: Written because mid-'90s Jane and Maura would have been so cute together. This isn't quite angst and it isn't quite fluff and there won't be any real drama. It's just an all-around feel good, girl-meets-girl, mid-'90s teen love story. Enjoy! :)**

* * *

Jane Rizzoli's eighteenth year of life felt like a transitional phase. She had been accepted to the prestigious Boston Cambridge University, but she threw away her acceptance letter the day after she had received it. Jane had proven to herself that she could get in, but she never had any intentions of actually attending BCU. Her guidance counselor praised her for her achievement, but her praise became a lecture once she found out what Jane had done to her acceptance letter. Mr. and Mrs. Rizzoli knew nothing of their daughter's acceptance to BCU and Jane wanted to keep it that way because, had they found out, Jane's fate would have been sealed and she would have submitted her intent to register against her will. Mrs. Rizzoli knew her daughter was bright and she wanted the best for her, but what her mom thought was best for her was entirely different from the future that Jane had in mind for herself. All throughout high school, Jane had dreamed of being a police officer and she wasn't going to put off her dream for another four years just to attend BCU when she could attend a junior college and enroll in the police academy after earning her Associate's Degree. She'd be starting her dream job two years earlier and graduating without any student loans. Jane thought it was the most adult decision she had ever made, but she planned on keeping it to herself. There was no easy way to tell her parents she wanted to be a police officer and Jane was going to hold off on telling them until the moment was right, which she figured might not be until she was actually in the academy or maybe even until she had a badge.

Her parents thought she had become unmotivated or—heaven forbid—a 'slacker,' but what they didn't know is that their eighteen-year-old already had her entire life planned out and it was only a matter of time before she achieved her goals. Until then, Jane was going through the motions. She was taking a full course load at a local junior college. Her classes were mainly general education classes required for her to earn her Associate's Degree, but Jane still put her all into them and when she wasn't in school Jane divided the rest of her time between two jobs. They weren't particularly _demanding _or _well-paying _jobs, but it was gainful employment, nonetheless.

Jane's favorite job was at a music store called The Basement. She had never imagined herself working at a music store, but her best friend Mark got her the job after she had gone in to visit him and his boss said he liked her moxie. Their boss, Jerry, was a former hippie turned conservative who had owned the music store since the mid-'70s and, although he liked Mark and Jane, he loved to complain about their generation's music. "This gloomy music is what's wrong with young people today. Back in my day, we believed in things and our music came from the heart," is what he'd tell them followed by the obligatory, "Mark, take off that damn earring and, Jane, it's call the women's department. Maybe you should shop there."

As usual, Jane arrived at The Basement a few minutes before her scheduled time out of breath and with her skateboard in hand. Jerry took one look at Jane's ensemble and shook his head. "I know I don't pay you that much but I do pay you enough to buy a new pair of jeans," he told her.

"These _are_ new," Jane responded. "I cut holes in them and sandpapered them last night. What you're looking at is a Jane Rizzoli original."

Jerry was completely dumbfounded. "So, you took a perfectly good pair of blue jeans, cut them, and then rubbed sandpaper all over them to make them look like they came out of a dumpster?"

"Welcome to the '90s," Mark said and gave him a pat on the shoulder.

"Damn kids these days with their ripped jeans and grunge music," Jerry muttered as he walked away from them.

"It's good to see you, too, Jerry," Jane called out.

After clocking in, Jane took off her oversized flannel shirt and tied it around her waist. Underneath her flannel was an Alice In Chains t-shirt she had borrowed from Mark a year ago and had yet to give back to him. The shirt would have appeared large on most girls, but Jane wasn't the size of most girls. There was room for her to fit her whole body twice, which is one of the reasons why that shirt was her favorite. It was comfortable and wearing it reminded her of all the times she listened to music with Mark in his car instead of attending parties or other social functions like high school students were expected to.

"Yo, Jane," Mark said after Jane had finished ringing up her first customer of the workday. She was a teenage girl who purchased an Ace of Base cassette and Jane gave herself a mental pat on the back for keeping her mouth shut about the girl's taste in music.

"What's up?"

"You doing anything tonight?" Mark asked. It was the question Jane hated the most. He knew she wasn't doing anything after work, yet he felt compelled to ask, which could only mean he had already made plans for her.

"I know where this is headed," Jane sighed. "Who's the chick?"

"Her name is Markie," Mark began. "She stopped in here yesterday and bought a Soundgarden tape, so I know she's cool. She goes to BCU but she's not a nerd, you know, or a spoiled rich kid. But, yeah, she invited me to watch her friend's band play at Stuevie's tonight."

"No," Jane told him. "Not like 'no, get out of here,' but 'no, I'm not going,'"

"We always have fun at Stuevie's," Mark pointed out. "Remember when we went for your birthday and the bartender gave us free shots because he liked your hair? Granted, you don't drink and we're underage, but at least I got yours and mine."

"You were wasted in minutes," Jane reminded him. "I spent the rest of the night keeping you hydrated and making sure you ate so you wouldn't throw up."

Mark got on his knees and wrapped his arms around Jane's legs. It was a pitiful sight, but Jane would have been lying if she said she didn't enjoy seeing Mark grovel. "Jane, please. She won't show up at the club without her friend. This girl is a dead ringer for Courtney Love. I have to score with her. I'll owe you _big_."

Jane remained firm in her stance. "No."

"Jane, c'mon," Mark pleaded. "If not for me, do it for yourself. You need something a little more tangible than that Claudia Schiffer dream you had the other day."

Although Jane was hesitant to admit it, she knew Mark was right. At eighteen-years-old, she had never been in a relationship and she had never been kissed except for the time she and Mark had been dared to kiss each other when they were fifteen. It was awkward and even a little bit disgusting, but neither of them were the type to pass up a dare.

"Fine," Jane groaned. Mark got up from his knees and hugged Jane as tightly as he could.

"Thank you so much, Jane. I owe you one."

Jane rolled her eyes. "Yeah, yeah, so tell me about the friend you two are setting me up with."

"Her name is Laura," Mark informed her. "Or is it Cora? Maura? No, it's definitely Laura. Laura Stiles or maybe she said Maura Isles. She's like majoring in physics and shit or some type of science. She's kinda weird, though, but who the fuck cares as long as she puts out, right?"

"I hate you, Mark," Jane muttered.

"What did you say?"

Jane made sure to enunciate each word. "I said _I…hate…you…Mark._"

Mark just shrugged. "That's fine."

Jane spent the rest of her shift ringing up customers and listening to music with Mark. It was no different from any other work day except for the fact that Jane couldn't get her mind off of what she was going to be doing later that night. She had hoped to spend a relaxing night at home, but instead she had let Mark talk her into going to Stuevie's with him so he could get laid. Jane had no intentions of rounding the bases with Markie's friend—this Laura or Maura or whatever her name was and she had a feeling she wouldn't even be the slightest bit interested in this girl, but Jane knew she still had to be polite to her and try to make conversation. _Jane this is going to be a long day followed by an even longer night._


	2. Living On The Periphery

**A/N: Thank you so much for all of the feedback on the last chapter. It really means a lot to me and your kind words inspired me to stay up and write this chapter. Sorry if it's so short, but I just thought I'd write an intro for Maura just like last chapter was an intro for Jane. I hope you enjoy it. :)**

* * *

Maura Isles had never been a popular girl nor had she ever been anyone's best friend. Over the duration of her preschool through twelfth grade years, Maura kept to herself except for the occasional elementary school birthday party in which the birthday boy or girl's parents invited every kid in class. Maura would attend the parties, but she was merely an observer rather than a participant. None of the other kids would talk to her let alone_ play_ with her, so, instead, she'd stand against a wall or sit at a table and watch her classmates play Pin the Tail On the Donkey and Duck, Duck, Goose until it was time for her mother to pick her up. If she ever tried to participate, they'd all start chanting "Maura the Bore-A" until little pigtailed Maura would retreat back to her position against the wall or at a table.

…but that was then. Maura Isles was now eighteen-years-old and she was determined to have an enjoyable college experience. She knew she wouldn't live a life that teen movies portrayed, but she hoped something _good _would finally happen to her.

Less than forty-eight hours after she moved into her dorm room, Maura decided she was going to join a sorority, but after attending Rush Week events she received zero bids and had an experience not unlike the birthday parties she attended as a child. The girls in attendance at these sorority events were considered hip and beautiful and many of them had been cheerleaders or Homecoming Queen in high school. Maura knew she had a lot to offer a sorority, but there was just something these girls had that she didn't or maybe it was something Maura had that the other girls didn't have. Maura was poised and that might have been a quality these girls weren't looking for in a sorority sister. Not wanting to feel defeated, Maura decided to attend a frat party with some girls who lived down the hall from her. The party was _somewhat _enjoyable until one of the frat guys asked Maura to take a hit from the beer bong. The idea of putting her mouth on something that dozens of people at the party had also put their mouth on was the final straw for her. She politely declined and then returned to her dorm room. There were dozens of other organizations for Maura to join, but after being shunned by every sorority on campus and the rude awakening at the frat party, Maura felt it was safer to stick with what she knew: solitary confinement.

As days passed, she became closer to her roommate Marcia, whom everyone called Markie. Markie was unlike anyone she had ever met. She socialized with people, but she didn't exactly give a damn about what anyone thought of her. She was steadfast in her beliefs, especially her feminist beliefs. Markie was part of the riot grrrl movement and, although Maura wasn't too familiar with the movement, she enjoyed reading the zine that Markie and some of her high school friends had started. They wrote about heteronormativity and the social construction of gender—topics that Maura had never learned about in school. From Markie, she learned about body confidence and accepting her sexuality. Maura had yet to have a physical relationship with a woman, but she no longer felt as if her lesbianism was something taboo or something she had to be ashamed of.

Maura could honestly say that Markie was the first friend she ever had, which is why she was more than willing to attend her friend's gig at Stuevie's. Maura knew Stuevie's wasn't the type of venue she was familiar with, but Markie was going to be there and, as long as Markie was nearby, she knew she had nothing to worry about—nothing other than this blind date Markie had set her up on.

Maura looked through her closet for something to wear while Markie was putting the finishing touches on her make-up in the bathroom. Maura's closet was filled with designer clothes and vintage pieces from her mom that most girls envied, but nothing she owned felt right. Her clothes suddenly seemed so plain, so blasé, and what Maura wanted was to be bold if only for one night.

"Markie?" Maura called out from in front of her closet.

"What's up?"

"I'm going to borrow some of your clothes."

"Shut up," Markie scoffed. "Maura Isles wants to borrow _my _clothes?"

"May I?" Maura asked. "Nothing I own seems appropriate for tonight."

"Go ahead," Markie responded. The moment she had Markie's approval, Maura headed over to her closet and tried to find something to wear.

The contents of Markie's closet were the complete opposite of Maura's. There were oversized shirts, baby doll dresses, ripped jeans, vintage pieces from thrift stores, as well as clothes Markie had made herself. This was Markie's everyday wardrobe, but Maura felt as if she were playing dress up. She could lose Maura Isles for one night and become anybody she dared to be.

When she saw a distressed floral-patterned dress, she knew she had found the right piece for her. The dress had a baby doll fitted top and a flared skirt, which wasn't too different from dresses Maura was used to wearing. The dress fit her perfectly, but Maura knew something wasn't quite right.

"Markie!" she shouted. "Can you come here?"

"Are we going to a frat party?" Markie asked when she saw her. "Maura, you look like a vapid sorority girl."

There was no hiding Maura's confusion. She looked at herself in the mirror and, although she knew something was missing, she didn't feel as if she looked like a sorority girl. "How do I look like a sorority girl in _your _dress?"

Markie repeatedly looked Maura up and down. "It's not just what you wear, Maur. It's how you wear it that matters." She reached into her one of her drawers and pulled out some ripped, black thigh-highs. "Try these."

"But—"

"Try 'em, Maur."

Maura did as she was told and slipped the thigh-highs over her legs. "Do I still look like a sorority girl?"

"No," Markie insisted. "You look perfect. Now, let's do something about your hair and makeup."

Maura's mascara had been deemed suitable by Markie, so all that was left was her lipstick. She typically wore lip gloss or nude lipstick, but Markie knew that wasn't going to cut it tonight. As long as Maura was changing her look, Markie told her she might as well take it to the next level. She handed her a tube of burgundy lipstick and Maura applied it as carefully as she could. The burgundy hue made her skin look pale, but Markie insisted that it suited her just fine, so Maura decided to take her word for it.

Once her makeup was completed, Maura worried about what was in store for her hair. Markie's dark hair was continuously bleached until it had become platinum and straw-like. Maura thought Markie was a beautiful girl, but she had absolutely no desire to have hair like hers. Maura took pride in her golden locks; she had never dyed her hair and she had no intention of ever doing so.

Maura put a hand on each of Markie's shoulders and held them in a firm grip. "Please tell me my hair will never come in contact with a bottle of peroxide."

"Sit!" Markie commanded. She had completely ignored Maura's statement and all of her focus was on what she should do with Maura's hair. After several failed attempts at styling it like hers, Markie grabbed Maura's hair and piled it into a messy ponytail. There were loose strands hanging out but it was the only hairdo that was given Markie's approval.

Maura stared at herself in the mirror, completely in disbelief that the girl staring back was actually her own reflection. If only her high school classmates could see her now. Her exterior no longer resembled the nerdy girl that everyone had tormented—their very own "Maura The Bore-A." She was still living on the periphery, but for once—just once—she wouldn't be the only one on the outside looking in. She was finally going to belong, even if only for a night.


	3. An Awkward First Encounter

**A/N: Now that the introductions are over, it's time for some Rizzles moments. :)**

* * *

With just ten minutes before Mark and his friend Jane were due to arrive, a feeling of nervousness was starting to creep up on Maura. They were going to get into a car with people they didn't know—people who had goodness knows what intentions with them. She had wanted an exciting college experience and she had wanted the occasional adventure, but Maura started to worry that this wasn't going to be a good idea. During orientation, all of the female students attended a safety seminar in which they were given tips like never leave your drink unattended and statistics on date rape. What she and Markie were about to do went against everything that seminar had taught them, but Markie didn't seem the slightest bit nervous, which only made Maura wonder if she was overreacting.

"Open your hand," Markie ordered.

Maura did as she was told and Markie placed two flavored condoms in the palm of Maura's hand. "Flavored condoms? Why would I need these?"

Markie winked at her. "One's for you and one's for Jane." She had hoped that would be all the explanation she needed to give her, but the confused look on Maura's face told her otherwise. "I know neither of you has a penis and you don't have to worry about getting pregnant, but there's so many STDs out there and I want you to be safe. These things can be turned into a dental dam and they're flavored so it won't be disgusting."

Maura's eyes grew wide. Sex was something she hadn't even contemplated while getting ready for her blind date, but Markie had already thought of everything for her. "Markie, I appreciate the gesture, but I'm not going to have sex with her. I don't even know this girl."

"Maura," Markie said as she held her hand. "I want you to take them just in case and keep them in your purse. What if you and Jane get caught up in the moment? I don't want you to have sex without any type of protection. It's too risky to just go down on a girl without using anything. If you were in a monogamous relationship, it'd be different, but you can't be too careful when it comes to hook ups. I use these all the time when I go down on guys, so I know they're effective."

"Okay," Maura sighed. Once Markie let go of her hand, she placed the condoms securely in her purse. She had no intentions of having sex with Jane, but she was grateful that Markie was looking out for her. Never before had someone cared about her so deeply or been so kind to her. After Markie handed her a pair of scissors and gave her a quick lesson on how to turn a condom into a dental dam, the girls left their dorm room in search of Mark.

He was waiting near their building with Jane, but before Maura could even look in his direction, Markie was pulling her over to them. "I see him! He looks so hot tonight! Maura, hurry!"

Markie was smiling and confident when they approached Mark and Jane, but Maura felt her cheeks start to blush. The tall brunette in ripped jeans and a white tank top was _her _date and Maura was in awe of how effortlessly sexy she looked. There was no need for her to wear dark lipstick or thigh highs and a baby doll dress like she and Markie were wearing. There was just something _different _about this girl_. _Maura wasn't sure how, but she had managed to be both masculine and feminine and pull off those characteristics better than any guy or girl Maura had ever met. Before they had spoken a single word to each other, Maura quickly reached into her purse to be certain the condoms and the miniature scissors from Markie's sewing kit were in there. She may not have wanted them while she was in her room, but now she was grateful that Markie had thought ahead.

"Since Mark is an asshole and not introducing us, I guess it's up to me," Jane said to them. "I'm Jane." The moment she heard her speak, Maura felt as if she was getting weak in the knees.

"I'm Markie," Markie said casually. "Anyone ever tell you that you look like a grungy Sandra Bullock?"

"All the time," Jane responded. "But I think it's cool." When she smiled wide enough to show her dimples, Maura knew she was a goner. _Don't stare at her, Maura. Don't stare at her._

Markie noticed Maura's nervousness and decided to step in. "Where are my manners? This is my friend and roommate Maura, but I call her my froommate or froom for short," Markie informed Jane. That endearing little introduction made Jane smile, which only increased Maura's nervousness.

"Yeah, we're frooms," Maura added, not quite realizing what she was saying.

"Are you okay?" Jane asked.

Maura tried to think of something clever or _cool _to say, but absolutely nothing came to her. "I'm fine," Maura squeaked.

"She drunk?" Mark asked Markie.

"Not at all," Markie insisted. "She stayed up all night writing a paper and she's a little out of it. Lack of sleep, you know?"

"Yeah, all nighters are the worst," Jane agreed. "It takes a long time to recover from them, but Maura, it's cool that you decided to hang out with us even though you're tired."

_Jane thinks I'm cool? Act cool, Maura. Act cool. _"I really like your hair," Maura told her.

"Yeah, me too," Markie added. "It's like totally out of control."

Their compliments were filling Jane's head and she couldn't stop herself from smiling. She was used to compliments from people, but never had she received a compliment from someone like Maura. Maura's compliment about her hair replayed in Jane's mind. It wasn't just the compliment itself that made Jane smile, it was the way Maura said it. Her words came out awkwardly, but Jane could tell she was sincere. _For once, I'm glad I listened to Mark. She's so cute, but why is she nervous? Jane, she's your date; it's your duty to make her feel at ease._

"I like your outfit," Jane told her. She watched as a smile spread across Maura's face. _You're heading in the right direction, Jane._

"It's Markie's," Maura responded shyly.

"It's mine, but it looks great on her, even better than it looks on me," Markie said as she put her arm around Maura. "This isn't how she usually dresses, but that just shows how amazing she looks in everything."

"I'm sure she always looks beautiful," Jane told her. She may have been talking to Markie, but her eyes never left Maura. There was something so beautiful and delicate about her and, although she had just met her, Jane wondered what it would be like to kiss Maura on the cheek, on her lips, on her neck, on—

"Hey, Rizzoli, you have a tent in your pants," Mark announced in front of Markie and Maura. Markie had caught on to the joke, but Jane was grateful Maura didn't understand what Mark was referring to.

"Mark, really?" Jane asked angrily. Had Maura not been there, she would have slugged him, but instead she kept her cool.

"Mark?" Maura asked.

"What's up?"

"What are you referring to when you say Jane has a tent in her pants?"

_Oh, no. Mark, no. Don't you—_

"She has a girl boner," Mark informed Maura. "She's sexually excited, happy in the pants, and all of that stuff."

_That's it. I'm kicking his ass. When this date is over, I'm pulling him out of the car and I'm going to kick his ass. _

"Jane, I have some condoms in my purse," Maura said nonchalantly. "Markie taught me how to convert them into dental dams."

"Whoa!" Mark laughed. "Maura, you are _awesome_! You cut right to the chase."

"What did I say?" Maura asked. Jane thought she would be put off by such a comment, but with Maura it was different. She had a feeling Maura was nervous about this date, so she decided to take it easy on her.

"Excuse us," Jane said as she led Maura away from their friends. Without thinking, Jane grabbed Maura's hand. Had she thought about it, she probably wouldn't have had the nerve. Maura's hands were soft and the exact opposite of Jane's. She wanted to hold onto her hand for the rest of the night, but Jane knew it was best to wait.

"I'm sorry," Maura told her once they were alone.

"It's cool," Jane insisted. "I think we're both nervous and just talking without thinking. Is this your first date?"

"Yes," Maura responded. "Is this yours?"

"Yeah," Jane told her. "And it doesn't help that we hadn't met each other until right now."

"It was a pleasant surprise," Maura told her. "You're very beautiful, Jane, and incredibly sweet."

Jane started blushing. She wanted to hide her face, but Maura had reached out and grabbed her hands to prevent her from hiding. "Don't let that get out," Jane told her. "My reputation will be ruined."

"I'm not ready to have sex," Maura admitted. "I'm not sure why I even said that."

"Neither am I. Well, I'm not sure why you said that, but I'm also not ready for sex either. I don't even know what I'm saying," Jane told her. "Our friends suck. Well, Markie doesn't, but Mark just sucks. I swear I'm going to kick his ass tonight. He's making it awkward for us and he's going to for the rest of the night, so what about if we make a pact?"

"A pact?" Maura asked. "I've never made a pact before."

Jane couldn't help but smile. "There's a first time for everything. If Mark embarrasses us in any way, we have to promise not to take it to heart and we won't let it effect how we feel—I mean—what we think about each other."

"I promise."

"And you go on a real date with me tomorrow," Jane muttered.

"What did you say?" Maura asked. "I couldn't hear you."

"Nothing," Jane responded. "I'm just talking to myself." _Talking to yourself? Smooth one, Jane. You're going to go to Stuevie's, try not to murder Mark, and then when you bring Maura back home you're going to ask her on a real date. _


	4. Maura Isles Is Not A Necrophiliac

**A/N: And the fluff begins...**

* * *

Stuevie's was a hole in the wall venue and unlike any place Maura had ever experienced. The moment she walked in, the air was heavy with the scent of cheap alcohol and cigarette smoke. The girls in attendance were dressed similarly to her, but she still felt as if she were an outsider. This was their scene—their home—and she was nothing more than some girl playing dress up.

…and then Jane held her hand. "This place can get crazy sometimes. Just stick with me," Jane told her. Stick with her? At that moment, Maura was ready to travel to the edge of the world and back with her. She had expected someone to make a comment about the two of them holding hands, but Maura had yet to notice anyone even giving them a second glance. They were accepted there and she was free to be affectionate with Jane—if she ever had the nerve to be affectionate with Jane.

"Snot's set is in fifteen minutes," Markie told them. "Wanna just chill for now?"

"Your friend's name is Snot?" Mark asked. "Is that on his birth certificate?"

"Nah," Markie responded. "His real name is Steven, but he's a fucking piece of snot, so everyone addresses him as such. He met Maura a couple of days ago and called her the Queen of the Dead."

"Why?" Jane asked.

"She's a necrophiliac," Mark told Jane. "I forgot to mention that."

"I'm not a necrophiliac," Maura said defensively.

"What?" Mark asked, well aware of what Maura had told him.

"I'm not a necrophiliac!" Maura shouted. Much to her chagrin, the song had ended and everyone was staring at her. There were people who started laughing while others just stood with their mouths hanging open, eyeing her. It was one of the most embarrassing moments of her life and she wasn't quite sure how to get herself out of it.

"Well, she isn't," Jane announced. "And I'm especially happy about that."

Maura scanned the room and noticed that people were starting to pay less attention to her now that Jane had spoken. Jane was a regular there and, as long as she stayed with her, everything was going to be okay. Those who had laughed had now returned to their alcohol and cigarettes or whatever they had used to amuse themselves before their amusement came at Maura's expense.

"Thank you," Maura mouthed to Jane. There was no verbal response from Jane, but seeing her smile was all that Maura needed.

Maura wasn't quite sure why, but when she had agreed to hear Snot's band play, she had imagined him singing heartfelt lyrics over the sound of an acoustic guitar, but she couldn't have been further from the reality of the situation. Snot's lyrics might have been heartfelt, but Maura couldn't tell over his shouting and the loudness of his guitar.

"Mosh pit?" Mark suggested once the mosh pit in the center of the Stuevie's was in full force.

"Fuck yeah!" Markie responded. "Maura, you in?"

"Maura and I are going to sit this one out," Jane told them. Maura had never experienced a mosh pit before, but judging by the way people were moving around so violently, she knew she wanted no part of it.

"You should be in there with them," Maura said to Jane when they were standing alone against a wall. Just as she was during childhood, Maura was standing against a wall observing instead of participating, but for the first time she actually didn't mind. For Maura, life wasn't what was happening in the mosh pit; life was what was happening while standing against the wall with Jane.

"Mosh pits aren't my thing," Jane admitted. "I was in one this summer and some guy grabbed my ass, so I decked him. It was all so gross and then his girlfriend jumped in and tried to take me on."

"You were in a bar fight?" Maura asked. "You're eighteen-years-old and you've already been in a bar fight. That's impressive."

"I guess," Jane laughed. "So does this mean you like bad girls?"

Maura leaned in closer to her until their lips were just inches apart. "That depends."

"On?"

"On whether or not you're a bad girl," Maura responded. She was about to close the gap between them when Jane pulled away.

"You wanna get out of here?" Jane asked. "We can go to the backseat of Mark's car."

_This is it, Maura. She wants you as much as you want her._

Maura had felt herself coming undone from the moment she first laid eyes on Jane. Jane was gorgeous, but so were a lot of girls. It was much more than her appearance that completely dismantled Maura. Jane was a sweet girl with a tough side—maybe even a bad side—and Maura was eager to find out just how bad she could be.

Maura had expected, no, she _wanted_ Jane to ravish her, but instead Jane kept her distance. "I guess I'm not much of a bad girl," Jane admitted.

Maura suddenly felt relieved. Now that she had stopped to think, she wondered how she could let her libido get the best of her. "Neither am I."

"But I'm glad I finally have you alone," Jane told her. "I've been waiting this whole time to get you alone."

"Why is that?" Maura asked as she scooted closer to Jane.

"I don't know," Jane shrugged. She looked out the window and then looked at the stamp the bouncer had put on her hand, anything to keep from showing Maura how embarrassed she was.

"Tell me about Jane…"

"Rizzoli," Jane added.

"Tell me about Jane Rizzoli," Maura urged her.

"You want the truth?"

"Nothing but the truth," Maura insisted.

Jane quickly looked down before smiling. Had it been Mark or her mom she was talking to, they would have known she was up to something, but Maura was completely oblivious. "All I can say is that my life is pretty plain. I like watchin' the puddles gather rain."

"That's where this is headed?" Maura asked. She didn't want to humor Jane, but she was grateful Jane had added some levity to their situation. "Would you like to know about Maura Isles?"

"I want to know everything about Maura Isles," Jane insisted.

Maura paused for a few seconds so she could try to remember the lyrics. The fact that they were speaking these lyrics rather than singing them made Maura laugh out loud. "All I could do is just pour some tea for two and speak my point of view, but it's not sane. I just want someone to say to me, I'll always be there when you wake. You know I'd like to keep my cheeks dry today."

Jane knew she was being bold, but she saw it as the perfect opportunity to kiss Maura's hand. "So stay with me and I'll have it made."

Jane was staring at her with her big brown eyes as she had Maura's hand pressed to her lips. The gesture seemed sincere, but was there any sincerity in her words or was she just going along with their exchange of song lyrics. Maura wanted to find out, but she knew rejection would just add to all of the embarrassment she had felt earlier, so she decided to change the subject. "Jane?"

"Yes?"

"We really should stop pilfering that Blind Melon song," Maura insisted.

"Good idea," Jane agreed.

"Jane?" Maura asked, hoping her questions hadn't made her a nuisance.

"What's up?"

"You don't have to let go of my hand."

Jane made the switch from cupping Maura's hand to lacing their fingers. It was a small gesture, but it was still so intimate for the two of them. Jane and Maura reveled in the innocence of their situation. They had both wondered if the other was interested in pursuing this, but now it went without saying. While others were seeking to hook up, they were satisfied with holding hands in the backseat of Mark's car. Mark was going to tease them mercilessly for it, but they no longer cared. Jane and Maura were going to take things to the next level tomorrow by going on their first _real _date with each other.


	5. Spearmint and Strawberry

With less than half an hour before she was expected to pick up Maura, Jane was still putting the finishing touches on her outfit. It was her first date and she wasn't sure what she should wear, so she opted for a black jumper with an oversized flannel shirt carelessly thrown over it. She went through half a can of mousse to tame her curls, but she had finally gotten her hair the way she liked it. _A dress? Why did you choose a dress? She's going to think you're trying too hard. Better change the shoes. _She took off the sandals she was wearing and quickly put on a pair of Converse low top sneakers. _Much better._

Now that her outfit had been chosen, there was only one more obstacle for Jane to overcome: asking permission to borrow her mom's car. It was rare for Angela to refuse permission for Jane to borrow her car, but her permission came at a price. Jane would have to face an interrogation, which meant telling her mom that she was going on her first date.

"Ma," Jane said as sweetly as she could. Her mom was preparing dinner in the kitchen, so Jane thought she'd be a good daughter and help her slice some vegetables.

"What is it this time?" Angela asked. _Oh, Jane, why didn't you use your regular voice?_

"Can I borrow the car?" Jane asked. She continued to slice a tomato in hopes that helping her mom would divert any questions.

Angela stopped what she was doing so she could look at her daughter. She was looking for the slightest hint of nervousness in Jane's voice. "You going somewhere with Mark?"

"I have a date," Jane said nonchalantly.

"You have a date?" Angela asked excitedly. Before Jane could respond, Angela had already embraced her daughter. "My little Janie is going on her first date! Why didn't you tell me? Who's the lucky girl? When do I get to meet her? You should invite her over for dinner."

"Ma, please," Jane struggled to say as she was caught in her mom's embrace. "I just met her last night. Don't start planning our wedding yet. Her name is Maura. She goes to BCU. She's nice and she's pretty and she's smart and I have so much fun talking to her. If we keep dating each other, I'll bring her here to meet you or maybe the three of us could go out for lunch, but it'll never get to that point if I can't borrow the car and take her out on a date. Please, Ma. I've only known her for a day and I already like this girl so much."

Angela held her daughter at arm's length so she could take a look at her outfit. "You're going on a date dressed like _that_?"

"What's wrong with this?" Jane asked.

"Sneakers and a flannel shirt with a dress? And aren't you getting her flowers?"

"No way!" Jane responded. "It's the '90s, Ma. No one does things like that anymore. I made her a wish bracelet instead, but I'm already going to be late so can I please borrow the car?"

"You know where the keys are."

Jane quickly gave her mom a hug before taking off. "Thanks, Ma."

"And don't bring it back on empty!" Angela shouted at her overly excited daughter.

Jane was caught in traffic on the way to BCU and she was worried about how Maura might react. _I'm late. What if she thinks I stood her up? _

She was relieved to see Maura waiting for her outside of her building. Instead of the ripped thigh-highs and baby doll dress she wore last time, Maura went for a natural look with a sunflower print summer dress, sandals, and no make up other than her mascara. Jane had wanted to meet her at the door to her building, but once Maura saw her in the car, she hurried over to Jane.

The moment Maura sat down in the passenger seat, she wrapped her arms around Jane and Jane could smell the soft, floral scent of Ralph Lauren Romance. Maura had done nothing more than hug her, but the scent of her perfume and the softness of her skin made Jane's mind start to race. She became lost in a fantasy world in which Maura was her girl and she was able to kiss her whenever she so desired.

"Hi," Maura said nervously, pulling Jane from her fantasy.

"Hi," Jane responded equally as nervous. "You look really pretty."

"Thank you. I decided to wear my own clothes today."

"I can tell," Jane teased. "That dress is definitely something Markie wouldn't wear. I like you when you're you."

"As opposed to whom?" Maura asked.

"As opposed to the girl you were last night. I'm not saying you weren't you, but you were you being someone else. Shut up, Jane."

"Don't shut up," Maura insisted.

Jane was mortified. "Did I say that out loud? Did you really just hear me tell myself to shut up?"

Maura touched her on her arm, which only added to Jane's awkwardness. "Jane, I understood what you were telling me. Please don't be embarrassed. There's no need."

"I'm sorry I didn't bring you flowers," Jane blurted out. "I thought it was lame, but if you're into that thing, I can get some for you."

"Jane, sweetheart, calm down," Maura insisted. "I don't want flowers. All I want is you. I mean, all I want is to spend time with you."

"Then let's spend time with each other," Jane said as she pulled out of the parking lot. "I'm taking you to dinner and then we're going to my favorite place."

The girls made small talk during dinner, both of them eager for what was to come. Jane loved going to the river and she had always wondered what it would be like to go with a girl instead of Mark or her brothers. The sun had already gone down and Jane was becoming nervous about what she had planned for Maura.

The Boston skyline was already illuminated and the lights were reflecting off the Charles River. The bridge they were standing on was in a secluded area and Jane started to wonder if it was such a good idea to bring Maura there. Maura was either nervous or disinterested; Jane honestly couldn't tell.

"This is beautiful," Maura said as she moved in closer to Jane.

"I didn't think you liked it."

"I do. I'm just…cold."

_Jane, what's wrong with you? Offer her your shirt. _"Here, put this on." Jane handed Maura her flannel and watched as Maura put it on over her dress. The black and teal flannel completely clashed with the sunflowers on Maura's dress, but Jane knew she had never seen a more beautiful sight.

"Jane?"

"Yeah?"

"There's a reason why I didn't bring a sweater," Maura admitted. "I knew you were going to wear a flannel shirt and I wanted to feel it against my skin."

"I have a better idea," Jane began. "Let me hold you as you're wearing the shirt." Immediately after making that suggestion, Maura rested her head on Jane's shoulder. As much as Jane wanted to kiss her, she worried about Maura's reaction so she allowed herself to be content with holding her.

"This is the best idea anyone has ever had."

"I'm glad you like it," Jane told her. "This is where I come whenever I want to get away, but I don't think it'll ever be the same anymore. Now, any time I come here, all I'm going to do is think of you and this moment and how good it feels to hold you."

"I'm glad I listened to Markie when she suggested I go on a blind date with you."

"I can top that," Jane said jokingly. "I'm actually glad I listened to Mark. Mark, of all people."

"Jane, what's this?" Maura asked as she pulled a bracelet out of Jane's flannel shirt pocket.

"Just something I made last night," Jane said nonchalantly. "It's for you."

"No one has ever made anything for me," Maura told her as she ran her fingers over the bracelet.

"It's a wish bracelet," Jane informed her. "Here, let me show you." She laid the bracelet across Maura's wrist, all the while keeping her eyes on the shy facial expressions Maura was making. "I want you to make a wish. Wish for anything you want and then tell me when you're finished."

Maura paused for nearly a minute while she thought of her wish. "Okay, I've made my wish."

Jane smiled at her and finished tying the bracelet around her wrist. "You have to keep this on until the threads wear thin and it falls off. If you keep it on that long without ever taking it off, your wish will come true."

"Do I really have to wait that long?" Maura asked worriedly. "That might not be for weeks."

Jane intertwined her fingers with Maura's. The wish bracelet made of thread and small beads wasn't what Maura was used to, but it was a bracelet made by Jane and Maura was going to cherish it even after it fell off. She didn't know how long Jane would be in her life, but she knew she was going to keep this bracelet as a reminder of her first crush. "What did you wish for?" Jane asked.

"This," Maura said before pressing her lips to Jane's. They tasted a combination of Maura's strawberry lip gloss and Jane's spearmint lip balm. The flavors and textures were an unusual combination but, in that moment, it didn't matter. It was their first kiss and the girls prolonged it until they needed to pull away for air.

"Can I kiss you again?" Jane asked. She touched her lips to check for the presence of Maura's lip gloss. The remnants of her lip gloss were proof that the kiss had actually happened.

"You never have to ask," Maura reassured her. "I'm yours to kiss as many times as you'd like."


	6. Jane and Maura's First Crush

**A/N: Thank you so much for the fic love. I'm glad some of you are enjoying the '90s setting. :)**

* * *

Maura was stopped dead in her tracks by the sound of a Gin Blossoms song blaring from her dorm room. She was a mere ten feet down the hall from her room, but she debated whether she should enter or enjoy the song from out in the hall. No one would judge her if she listened to it from out in the hall, but she worried about how Markie might respond to her enjoying a Gin Blossoms song. They were her favorite band—Markie was well aware of it—but they also reminded her of Jane and anything that reminded her of Jane was sure to spark an hour-long conversation about her. Three days had passed since their first kiss, three days in which they hadn't seen each other, but the two of them spent countless hours on the phone. Maura's mother had paid for Maura to have a phone in her room and, although Maura had once thought it was a waste of money, she was now grateful for her mom's added expense.

"Gin Blossoms," Maura said as she finally entered her room. "They're Jane's third favorite band."

"And _your_ favorite," Markie pointed out. "But this is going to turn into another talk about what Jane likes instead of what you like, isn't it?"

"Yes," Maura said bashfully. "I'm sorry."

"She's your first crush, Maura. You don't need to apologize for talking about her," Markie pointed out. "Since it's Jane and I know she has good taste, I guess I'll ask what other bands she likes."

Maura neatly put her belongings on her desk before sitting on her bed directly across from Markie. Most people would have become annoyed, but she was grateful that Markie was willing to listen to her talk endlessly about Jane. "Her favorite band is Nirvana," Maura began. "They have been since she was fifteen. Her second and third favorites are Green Day and Gin Blossoms although they fit into the category of pop/rock instead of alternative. Her fourth favorite is Hole. Her fifth favorite is Mazzy Starr, but we were listening to one of their songs as we kissed in the car so she said they're moving up on the list. Her sixth favorite is Pearl Jam. Her seventh favorite is Soundgarden. Her eighth favorite is Stone Temple Pilots. Her ninth favorite is Alice In Chains and her tenth favorite is Collective Soul. She has twenty favorites, but I'll just listen the first ten."

"You've memorized the order of her twenty favorite bands?" Markie asked in disbelief.

"I like learning about her," Maura responded. "She's so complex."

"Jane? Jane Rizzoli is complex? We're talking about the same girl, right? The sarcastic one with the out of control hair?"

"The way she acts around you and Mark or anybody else isn't how she acts around me," Maura said dreamily. "Around me, she's so gallant, even more so when we're alone."

"Maura, you've only been alone _once_," Markie pointed out.

"Once was enough for me to know," Maura told her. "She let me wear her shirt when I was cold. She made me a wish bracelet. She holds doors open for me. When we're on the phone, we tell each other the most intimate details of our lives and we're both so absorbed in what the other is saying."

"Just promise me you won't get hurt," Markie told her. "She's your first kiss and your first crush. I just don't want her to be the cause of your first broken heart."

"She won't be," Maura promised. "But, thank you for being so concerned. I'm not used to that from anyone other than Jane."

"Maura, we're frooms, remember? Frooms for life."

"Frooms for life," Maura agreed. "Should we do the secret handshake?"

Markie moved to Maura's bed so the two of them could slap their right hands together three times before slapping their left hands together five times followed by linking their right pinkies and shouting the word 'frooms.' It was, perhaps, one of the most juvenile things they had ever created, but Maura was thrilled she was finally close enough to someone to have inside jokes, nicknames, and a secret handshake.

* * *

The Basement typically experienced a lull in the afternoon and that afternoon was no different. The store was never particularly messy and there weren't any tasks to be completed, so every moment there were no customers, Mark and Jane used it as an opportunity to complete their house of cassettes. Cards weren't accessible at work, so they decided to use cassettes instead. Their house of cassettes behind the counter was now three feet tall and growing taller by the minute. Jane was adding another cassette when she and Mark heard the sound of the door opening. Instead of customers, Markie and Maura entered the store. Jane couldn't take her eyes off of her, which brought about her downfall. She lost her footing on the stool and fell to the ground, bringing the house of cassettes down with her.

"Jane!" Maura said worriedly as she rushed to her aid.

"I'm okay," Jane insisted, but she still allowed Maura to help her up. Had anyone else offered, it would have insulted her pride, but Jane wasn't about to object to physical contact from Maura. "A kiss would make me feel even better, though."

Maura looked around to make sure only Mark and Markie were present before giving Jane a peck on the lips. Kissing Jane in public didn't embarrass her in the slightest, but she was worried about what would result from kissing Jane at work. "How was that?"

"I feel better," Jane said as she intertwined her fingers with Maura's. "But we have three kiss-less days to make up for."

"Rizzoli!" Jerry shouted from his office. "What's going on in there?"

"Jane broke the story, Jerry," Mark shouted.

"You damn kids screw around too much," Jerry began. "Sometimes I wonder why I hired either of you, let alone both of you."

"It's because we're hard workers, Jer," Jane responded. "I've been working so hard that I need to take a ten minute break."

Before Jerry could respond, Jane had grabbed Maura's hand and led her outside to the alleyway. Mark and Jane had taken their breaks their many times, but Jane had a feeling this was going to be even better than standing in the alleyway with Mark. "What brings you here?" Jane asked as she leaned against the wall. "Did you drive all that way just to see me?" Maura leaned against Jane, her head resting on Jane's shoulder. It had only been three days since she had seen her, but the days lasted an eternity for Jane. Holding Maura felt right and she wanted nothing more than to be near her everyday.

"I've missed you," Maura whispered in her ear.

"Is that a secret?" Jane asked. "Why are you whispering in my ear?"

"It's an excuse to get even closer to you," Maura admitted. "I brought you some s'mores. Markie and I made them in the microwave and they're probably cold and hard now or maybe Mark has already eaten them, but if there are any left, know that I made them just for you."

"Maura, you _baked_," Jane said excitedly. "Even if they're as hard as a rock, I'll still love them. It's good to know you and Markie have mastered microwave cookery."

"We've _almost _mastered it," Maura responded. "She burned popcorn last night and the smoke detectors went off. The entire building had to be evacuated."

Jane tried to stifle her laughter, but the moment she saw Maura smile, she knew it was okay to just let go. "I wish I would have been there for that. I could just imagine how worried you two must have been."

"Nobody knows it was us," Maura informed her. "We aren't supposed to have microwaves in the dorms, so Markie and I made sure to unplug it and hide it before we left the building."

"My little rebel," Jane said once she was able to control her laughter. "You have a lot of fun with her, don't you?"

"She's my best friend," Maura responded.

"And my best friend is dating your best friend," Jane pointed out. "We should all hang out sometime, or maybe me and you could do something by ourselves. It doesn't matter. You and I are always on borrowed time. I want an entire day with you. I want an entire _week _with you. I'm either at work or school or you're at school—"

"How about an entire night together?" Maura interrupted. "You could spend the night with me in my bed or you could have my bed and I'll sleep in Markie's bed. She's going home for the weekend and I don't want to sleep alone."

"So we're having a sleepover?" Jane asked.

"With kissing involved," Maura added. "A whole night of kissing and talking to each other with no interruptions."

"Unless you burn something else in the microwave," Jane teased. "I have to get back to work. Can I call you tonight?"

"You never have to ask if you can call me," Maura reminded her. "Or if you can kiss me. I have a crush on you, Jane."

"Really?" Jane asked.

"There's no need to be facetious," Maura quickly pointed out.

"I have a crush on you, too," Jane told her. Jane was overdue to return to work, but she just couldn't let go of Maura. _Pace yourself, Jane. It's only a matter of time before you're in love with this girl._


	7. Maura's Solitary White Bead

**A/N: Sorry if this chapter is so much longer than the others. Some of it is a bit explicit. :)**

* * *

Her homework had been completed, her room had been cleaned, and she had done more than one wardrobe check in the hours before Jane was expected to arrive. Maura was alone in her dorm, which was unusual for her. She and Markie were practically inseparable and, because they were dating best friends, Markie tagged along when she wanted to see Jane and Maura tagged along when Markie visited Mark. In the rare moments that Markie left Maura by herself because she had to go to class or to a club meeting, their suitemates were always around to keep her company. Before college, Maura had gotten used to being alone, but now that she knew what it was like to have friends, she found it difficult to be without them, which is why she was especially grateful that Jane was going to spend the night with her. As much as she loved her friends, _nobody _could compare to Jane.

Although she was excited about spending an entire night alone with Jane, Maura was nervous about what the night had in store for them. Earlier that day, Maura's suitemate Roxie had come up with the ingenious idea of tracking each other's sexual conquests by using different color heart-shaped beads that they'd string from the ceiling. There were white beads for making out, light pink for manual stimulation, hot pink for oral sex, and red for going all the way. Their color code might have just been suggested a few hours prior, but Roxie had suggested they start with encounters that had happened since move-in day, which meant the playing field was far from level. Maura glanced at the strands of beads hanging from the wall. Her friends had an assortment of colorful beads, but all Maura had was one solitary white bead that symbolized the time she had made out with Jane in the backseat of her car. It wasn't a particularly _heavy _make out session, but it was making out nonetheless.

Maura's friends were putting pressure on her to go further with Jane, but she wasn't ready to give in to them. Jane was her first kiss and she wanted Jane to be her first _everything_ but only when the time was right. They had only been seeing each other for a short time and, unlike her friends, Maura wasn't willing to have sex with someone after the first date. She wanted Jane and she constantly fantasized about what she wanted to do with Jane, but she wasn't about to let her libido get the best of her regardless of how much Jane turned her on.

At exactly eight o'clock, Maura heard a knock on her door. As much as she hated to make Jane wait, she rushed to the bathroom before answering the door. She was going to do yet another wardrobe check although nothing about her clothes or her make up had changed since the last wardrobe check. Her suitemates had told her she looked flawless and Maura hoped Jane would agree with them.

Maura pulled Jane in as soon as she opened the door. She had talked herself out of going further with Jane, but every time she saw her, it was becoming more and more difficult for either of them to hold back. Maura knew it was too soon to be love, but it had to be more than lust. They were making out near the door, Maura's body pinned to the wall by Jane. Their hands were awkwardly roaming each other's bodies, unsure of what was off limits, but too embarrassed to ask. "White bead," Maura thought—or at least she had _hoped _that was just a thought.

"White bead?" Jane asked. _Why, Maura? Why?_

"White beads mean we've—we've made out," Maura stammered. She looked square into Jane's eyes, expecting her to be upset, maybe even wanting to leave, but Jane's reaction was the complete opposite. She was _smiling _at her, which put Maura at ease.

"What are the other colors?" Jane asked.

Maura tried to think of a way to explain their system without sounding like—as the term Markie coined to describe Roxie—a sex fiend. "I'll show you," Maura said as she led Jane to the area of her dorm where four strands of beads with name tags hanging from the ceiling.

"Markie, Maura, Roxie, and Stash," Jane read aloud.

"We each have one," Maura pointed out. "Roxie suggested this as a way of keeping track of our sexual encounters."

"These strings are long. How many sexual encounters do you plan on having?" Jane asked.

"As many as you'll let me," Maura responded. _Maura, why? Again, why? Why can't you think when you're around this girl?_

"I'll let you have as many as you want."

Maura looked at Jane's expression after she had said that. She wasn't smirking. She wasn't laughing. There was a look of sincerity on Jane's face. _Maura, your body is ready, but are you? _She didn't wait another moment to answer that question. Maura put her hands on Jane's waist and waited for a reaction from her. There was no verbal response, no sarcastic comment or protest. Instead, Jane pressed her lips to Maura's. "I'll tell you what the colors represent," Maura said after breaking their kiss.

"Or you can show me," Jane suggested.

"You're ready?" Maura asked, hoping she, herself, didn't seem uncertain.

"I am," Jane responded. "Are you?"

"I'm ready whenever I look at you."

Her response made Jane go from the confident girl she was just seconds ago to being as shy as she was when they first met. "Maybe we can catch you up to Roxie?"

"Jane? Sweetheart?" Maura asked when she noticed Jane avert her eyes. "We don't have to do this."

"I want to," Jane insisted. "I'm just overwhelmed. Maura, we're…losing it."

"As in our virginity, yes," Maura said matter-of-factly.

"I get to see you naked," Jane said in disbelief. "I get to touch you. I get to…do…everything to you."

"What is this _everything_?" Maura quipped. "And it isn't only you who gets to do _everything_. I want you just as badly."

"Maura?"

"Yes?"

"I don't know how I'm supposed to start," Jane said nervously.

Maura bit her lip to prevent herself from giggling. She found Jane's nervousness endearing and she was thrilled that Jane was just as nervous as she was, but she still didn't want to risk bruising her girl's ego. "There isn't a definitive way to have sex. We'll do whatever feels good for the both of us. What have you always fantasized about doing?"

"You don't want to know," Jane smirked.

"Tell me," Maura insisted.

She was taken by surprise when Jane grabbed the hem of her shirt and lifted it over her head. She met with no resistance from Maura who was now exposed to Jane save for her bra and the skirt she was wearing. Jane was about to unclasp her bra when Maura grabbed her hands and set them at her sides. "It's my turn," Maura insisted.

Jane was wearing a loosely-fitted flannel shirt, buttoned up just high enough to show that she wasn't wearing a tank top—or anything—underneath. Maura slowly unbuttoned each button, knowing that Jane's breasts would be fully exposed to her once she was finished. When there were no more buttons left to unbutton, Maura slowly grazed Jane's torso with her fingertips, working from her abs all the way to her shoulders. With one quick movement, Maura pulled the shirt from Jane's shoulders and the two of them let it fall to the ground, leaving Jane bare-breasted in front of her. Without breaking their eye contact, Maura unclasped her bra and tossed it on top of her desk. "This is me," Maura said nervously. She was about to cross her arms over her breasts, but she remembered it was _Jane _she was with—Jane who was just as nervous and self-conscious about this moment as she was.

Jane pulled Maura into her and Maura nearly shivered because of the skin-to-skin contact. "You're perfect," Jane whispered into her ear.

Maura could no longer hold back. "Make love to me?" There was no longer any space between them except for garments they were still wearing on the lower half of their bodies. In an awkward fumbling of buttons and zippers, they removed each other's clothing. Jeans, a skirt, a flannel, and a blouse were now crumbled on the cold floor of Maura's dorm room.

They were both caught in between girlhood and womanhood and it was evident in the way they looked. There was a gangly awkwardness about Jane's body, but Maura failed to notice any of that. In her eyes, Jane was the embodiment of perfection and she had so much desire for this girl. Judging by the way Jane was looking at her, Maura knew she was feeling the same way and all of her self-consciousness disappeared. The size of her chest, her waistline, her thighs—anything she had once considered an imperfection, but her friends insisted was perfect—no longer mattered in that moment because Jane wanted her for more than her physical appearance.

They made their way over to Maura's bed without any hesitation. Jane and Maura were lying next to each other, their lips locked in a kiss. She felt Jane's hands caress her breasts, but the caresses only lasted so long until Jane's hand moved to her inner thigh and remained stagnant as if she were waiting for permission. _She's afraid to touch me. _"It's okay," Maura insisted. "I want—I _need _you to touch me."

The slowness with which Jane moved her hands made Maura start to ache. She felt as if she couldn't wait another second and then Jane touched her where she had needed to be touched. Jane's fingers were gently rubbing Maura's swollen clit. As much as she was enjoying every stroke of Jane's fingers, she wanted more. She wanted to feel Jane and to _taste _Jane. "You're so wet," Jane said softly. "And so—so, Maura I don't even know what to say right now."

"I'm wet because of you," Maura whispered into her ear.

"Hey, Maura!" were the next words the two of them heard followed by "Oh, fuck. I'm so sorry!"

Jane and Maura looked in horror at Maura's suitemates who were standing near the door that adjoined their bedrooms. They were all too shocked to move except for Jane who quickly grabbed a blanket and threw it over herself and Maura.

Her suitemate Stash covered her eyes, but Roxie looked at them and started shaking her head. "Why wasn't there a scrunchie around the doorknob?" she asked.

Maura gave her a confused look while trying to remain fully covered. "Why would I put a scrunchie around the doorknob?"

"International symbol for 'I'm getting plowed,'" Stash pointed out once she had removed her hands from her eyes.

"Plowed?" Maura asked.

Stash and Roxie started cracking up and it wasn't long before Jane joined them. "It means some guy is balls deep in your vagina," Stash informed her.

"But Jane's a girl," Roxie reminded Stash. "So, I guess, in Maura's case, a scrunchie around the doorknob means Jane is knuckles deep in her vagina."

"She has long fingers," Stash told Maura. "Your girl is hung. Congrats. I'd high-five you, but I don't know where your fingers have been."

"It's not so much the length that matters," Roxie pointed out. "If a guy has a long dick, I'm like, 'so what.' All he's doing is slamming against my cervix and I get fucking annoyed. It's the girth that matters."

"True," Stash responded. "Since it's girth that matters, Jane, how many fingers did you use?"

"I hope you just used one to start with," Roxie said worriedly. "We want Maura's cherry to be popped in the least painful way. Let her get used to it first and then you can add a second finger, maybe even a third."

"I'll keep that in mind," Jane said hesitantly.

Maura was becoming annoyed with the entire conversation. She loved her friends, but all she wanted was an intimate moment with Jane. What they were experiencing was supposed to be beautiful, but now the memory of this was going to be tainted. "I'd like to be alone with Jane now."

"Yeah, no prob," Stash responded. "We just came to see if you wanted to go to a party."

"Not tonight," Jane said as politely as she could. "I really just want some time with Maura."

"We get it," Stash said nonchalantly. "Maura wants to finish cashing in her v-card."

"Jane's a cherry, too," Roxie pointed out. "You two have been going out for like—what—two weeks or so and you're already losing your virginity to each other? Sluts! Total sluts! I'm so proud!" She jumped on the bed with them and gave Jane and Maura each a hug. "Smooches! Meet us in the dining hall tomorrow morning and you two can tell us all about it at breakfast."

"Great," Jane said sarcastically.

Once they were gone, Maura covered her face with the blankets. "Jane, I'm sorry."

Jane pulled the blanket down. "It's not so bad."

"Not so bad?" Maura asked in disbelief. "My suitemates saw my labia. They saw us _both_ naked. I'll reiterate, they saw my _labia_. How is that not so bad?"

"Okay, it's bad," Jane admitted. "But it could be worse. At least they weren't disgusted or saying anything derogatory to you for being with a girl. They seemed _thrilled _that you were having sex. You have some pretty cool suitemates and friends."

"I do," Maura realized. "And I have the coolest girl in my bed. Thank you for not being upset."

Jane smiled at her. "Kind of embarrassed, yes, but not upset. Are they like that all the time?"

"All the time," Maura emphasized. "Do you want to—"

"Continue?" Jane interrupted. "Is it wrong if I want to cuddle instead?"

"Cuddling is never wrong," Maura insisted. "Stash and Roxie ruined the romance."

"They did," Jane agreed. "We're going to lose our virginity in the backseat of your car like normal teenagers."

"And you'll be knuckles deep," Maura quipped. "Jane, help. They're making me vulgar."

"I'm going to thank them for that."

Maura scrunched her nose in disgust, which made Jane start to laugh. It was still early for them to fall asleep, but cuddling gave them the perfect opportunity to talk to each other. That night, Maura fell asleep wrapped in Jane's arms. Never in her life had she felt anything as comforting as what she felt in that moment with Jane promising to hold her the whole night through. When she awoke the next morning, the first thing she noticed was that Jane had kept her promise. She was _still_ holding her.


	8. Jane Is More Virile Than Any Frat Guy

**A/N: Hmm...I might have to up this to 'M'...Yes? No?**

Jane woke up to a sensation she had never felt before. She wanted to open her eyes to take in the view, but she had a feeling leaving her eyes closed would heighten the sensation. Her girl was placing delicate kisses on her chest, but Maura's gesture didn't stay innocent for very long. Once the line of kisses ended at Jane's right nipple, Maura began to slowly circle it with her tongue.

"That feels good," Jane murmured. She had wanted to keep her eyes closed, but she couldn't help opening them. Jane felt Maura's body pressed up against her, but that wasn't enough. She wanted to _see _her. When she opened her eyes, the sight that greeted her was a newly-awaken Maura with tousled hair and no make-up. _She's even more beautiful in the morning._

The two of them hadn't gotten out of bed since their embarrassing moment with Maura's suitemates, not even to change into pajamas. They were still as naked as they were the night before and Jane had mentally patted herself on the back for spending the entire night holding a very naked Maura while still keeping her composure. She had imagined that moment several times before and it never included the two of them _cuddling _while naked.

"I can make you feel even better," Maura insisted.

"How?" Jane asked. She assumed Maura was bluffing, so she decided to go along with her. Jane noticed Maura bite her lip and avert her eyes. She was debating something and Jane knew it.

What Jane hadn't expected was for Maura to straddle her. Jane felt a shiver travel through her body at the skin-to-skin contact she was feeling with Maura. She knew Maura was wet without even touching her and she wondered what had gotten her in the mood, but she dared not ask out of fear of ruining the moment.

"Can I?" Maura asked. What she was asking if she could do was beyond Jane, but she wasn't about to say no to anything Maura wanted to do while they were in that position. Jane was so caught up in the view right in front of her: Maura straddling her, leaning in so that her hands gripped Jane's shoulders. Jane noticed the need in Maura's eyes. They had both saved themselves but now that they had found each other neither wanted to hold back any longer.

"Jane?" Maura asked, bringing her out of a trance.

"Yes?"

"I want us to feel each other."

Jane already felt her. She felt Maura's warmth and wetness mixing with hers. She felt her soft skin. She felt…something else for Maura that was beyond physical, but she couldn't pinpoint what it was. She knew it was partially lust, but there was more to it. If it were only lust, it would have cheapened the moment and the newfound connection she was making with Maura. There was something she wanted from Maura. She wanted Maura to be hers—she just _had to_ be hers. She couldn't imagine herself or Maura ever being with another girl, but it wasn't the time to ask her. It would be romantic, Jane concluded, but she didn't want Maura to think she was only asking her because of their sexual relationship.

"Jane?" Maura asked.

"I'm sorry," Jane nervously responded. "I'm thinking about so many things right now."

"We don't have to do this," Maura insisted.

"No, no, I want to."

"…so do I," Maura hesitated. "I put a scrunchie on the door knob when you were asleep."

"You minx," Jane said to add some levity. "You've been wanting to seduce me all morning."

"Jane?"

"Yeah."

"Are you feeling what I'm feeling?"

"Like there's a gusher between your legs?" Jane asked.

"I was going to word it differently, but yes. That's how I'm feeling."

Jane moved her hands from the sheets to Maura's thighs. "What do we do in situations like these?"

At that moment, Jane was given the answer she hadn't expected. Maura began to slowly grind herself into her. The wetness they felt in between them increased once Maura had paused to spread their lips. She now felt Maura even better than before. Jane couldn't help the moan that escaped her when she felt Maura's clit start to rub against hers. She felt as if she were having spasms in between her legs. She kept tightening and tightening until…_Jane, don't come. She only started like…five minutes ago. I know you're a virgin and this is new and you've never felt anything this good in your entire life and she looks so sexy and her breasts have a slight bounce to them when she's riding you, but don't come yet. If you come too quickly, she'll think something is wrong with you. No, wait, that's guys. Girls can come more than once. Maybe if you let yourself come now, it'll make her feel as if she were the greatest lover who ever existed. That's a good thing. Then again, what if you could only come once and when she tries to do something to you and your body doesn't respond, she feels like the worst lover ever? It's best not to come right now, Jane. You can do this. You can control yourself. _Maura, however, was completely unaware of Jane's internal struggle. She was now grinding herself faster and harder into Jane until Jane could no longer hold back.

When she felt Jane's breathing grow heavier, Maura quickly got off of her and went to work on rubbing Jane's clit with her fingertips.

"No," Jane said as she pulled Maura toward her. "We're not starting out like this."

"Like what?" Maura asked, although she was far less concerned with a response now that Jane was mimicking her actions.

"I'm not coming without you."

"Jane," Maura said softly.

"I'm not," Jane insisted. "I'm not that type of girlfriend—I mean, girl who is your friend."

A few more strokes of Jane's fingers brought about Maura's undoing. Never in her life had she heard something as beautiful as the sound of Maura moaning into her ear. The sound of Maura's moaning made Jane finally let go. She stopped her stream of consciousness and lost herself in the moment. She now felt more connected to Maura than she had ever felt with anyone. They had shared something so intimate with each other and Jane was grateful that it was Maura she had saved herself for.

As they were both calming down, Maura cuddled up to Jane and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "That was perfect."

"Better than perfect," Jane added.

She felt herself start to become aroused again when she noticed Maura slowly inserting the very two fingers that had touched Jane into her mouth. Maura closed her eyes as if she were savoring the taste. "I want more of this taste in my mouth," Maura whispered in her ear.

"You want round two?" Jane asked.

"And three," Maura responded.

"How about round two in the shower?"

"With Stash and Roxie listening through the walls?" Maura asked. "Maybe when we're more experienced. If I hear them say anything, I'll get performance anxiety."

The term 'performance anxiety' made Jane start to smile. "Okay, so we'll shower and then round two?"

"We have to shower separately," Maura insisted. "I'm not going to be able to look at warm water running down your naked body and _not _have sex with you."

"Okay, so we'll shower _separately _and then round two? What about breakfast? We're going to need to keep our strength up."

"We missed breakfast," Maura informed her. "Shower, round two, lunch, and then round three?"

"Okay," Jane agreed. "And then dinner and round four?"

"Spend the night again," Maura suggested. "We could squeeze in round five and six before bed."

"I don't have another set of clothes," Jane pointed out.

"Jane," Maura began. "Think about our itinerary. The only time you're going to be wearing clothes is for lunch and dinner."

"Reason number 156 why you're the perfect girl," Jane said as she wrapped her arms around Maura. "Roxie has twenty beads. You're going to earn six in one day. You'll catch up to her in no time."

"It's not about beads anymore," Maura insisted. "It's about being intimate with you."

"Bullshit," Jane told her. "We're going to have more beads than anyone. I'm far more virile than those frat guys Roxie sleeps with."

Maura winked at her. "Prove it to me."

It was exactly how they got started the first time, but Jane didn't mind. She was falling even harder for Maura now that she knew what it was like to be so intimate with her and, although she was embarrassed to admit it to her best friend, Maura was already becoming her whole world.


	9. Lovebirds and Multiple Janegasms

Just as she had the previous morning, Maura woke up safely tucked away in bed with Jane. The two of them hadn't gotten much sleep the night before and they hadn't enough energy to put their pajamas on, so Maura fell asleep naked in Jane's arms. Unlike the first night they spent together, there was no holding back or the need to ask whether or not they could touch one another. They belonged only to each other and Maura had made it evident that she was Jane's to touch whenever she so desired. Their caresses were still awkward and they were still hesitant to touch each other, but what mattered to them was that they were both on the same level. One wasn't putting pressure on the other and, although what they had done wasn't considered going all the way to some people—namely their friends—they felt as if what they had done forever changed them. It bonded them, although they weren't quite sure what they had bonded as. They weren't a couple. They were friends, but Maura knew they didn't have the type of friendship she had with Markie, Roxie, and Stash, although she confided in Jane the same as she confided in them. Maura didn't like to think of herself as _dating _Jane because she knew what dating implied and she felt as if she and Jane were beyond that. So what were they? Maura wanted to ask, but she was worried about the answer.

"What's on your mind?" Jane asked. She leaned in and kissed Maura on her temple. The kiss elicited a smile from Maura, but Jane knew something was still bothering her. "You know you could tell me anything."

"It's nothing."

"Maura, you can tell me," Jane insisted. "We're naked and holding each other the morning after we lost our virginity. This isn't the time to be shy."

Maura knew Jane was right. After everything they had experienced, it felt almost wrong to be shy around each other.

"I want you to be my girlfriend," Maura said matter-of-factly. "Will you?"

"No." Jane responded.

"No?" Maura asked in disbelief. She felt as if she had just gotten the wind knocked out of her and her mind shifted to whether or not Jane was just using her for sex. She had heard horror stories from her friends about guys who had promised them so much, but were only after one thing. Maura had told herself she would never allow that to happen to her; she'd be smarter than that, but there she was.

"I didn't mean _no_," Jane corrected herself. "I meant no as in not right now and no as in it's not supposed to happen this way."

Maura was confused. They liked each other, they spent all of their free time together, and they talked on the phone every night before bed. In which way was this supposed to happen? There was an awkward silence as both girls wondered what to say in this situation. Instead of looking at each other, they desperately scanned the room for something to distract themselves with. There were the beads hanging from the ceiling, the Polaroid photos of Jane Maura had taped to the wall next to her bed, Markie's large poster of Freddy Krueger, and some pictures from a _My Little Pony _coloring book that Markie and Maura had colored and taped to their wall on a rainy day.

Jane held Maura's hand up to her lips. "I like you more than I could possibly say and, as much as I want to be your girlfriend, I don't want our first memory as a couple to be like this. It feels as if the reason we're becoming a couple is because we spent our entire day and night having sex and that's not why I want to be your girlfriend. _I _want to be the one to ask you and I want it to be special for you—something memorable that you could tell our children about."

"Our children?" Maura asked.

When Jane saw the confused look on her face, she playfully pulled Maura on top of her. They had spent the majority of their evening in that position, but this time there was an innocence about it that almost overwhelmed Maura. This was the girl she was falling for and, even if their time together was short-lived, Jane had a part of her that nobody else ever would. Jane Rizzoli was her first love and the first girl she was ever intimate with and that would remain so for the rest of her life. She was going to be Jane's girlfriend _eventually_ and she couldn't wait to find out how Jane was going to ask her.

"It'll probably be about fifteen years from now," Jane told her, which brought Maura back to reality.

"What will be fifteen years from now?" Maura asked.

"When we have children," Jane pointed out. "By then, we should be established in our careers and have a strong foundation for our relationship."

Maura pressed her lips to Jane's. "We won't have any of that until we take the first step. How are you going to ask me to be your girlfriend?"

"I'm going to take you somewhere we've never been before and then—"

"Maura, open the door!" she heard Roxie shout from just outside the door that connected their rooms.

"Wait!" Maura responded before turning back to Jane. "And then what? How are you going to ask me?"

"Maura! Hurry!" Stash shouted as she pounded on the door. "This shit is getting old, man! You've barricaded yourself in your room for far too long. Please don't tell me you're studying."

"Please don't go anywhere," Maura whispered to Jane.

"There's nowhere else I'd rather be," Jane responded.

"Maura, why is there a scrunchie on our door?" she heard Markie ask. "Why are there scrunchies on _both_ doors? You don't use the international plow symbol for reading over your chem notes. C'mon, Maura, I need to put my stuff away."

Maura pried her lips away from Jane's when she realized Markie needed to get in their room. She grabbed a robe from her closet and tied it as securely as she could. Before answering the door, she signaled to Jane to get dressed so they wouldn't have a repeat of the other night. Their clothes had been neatly folded and set on top of Maura's desk in case of a situation like this, except for their panties. Jane had tossed them somewhere in a fit of passion and Maura hoped they would be able to find them before her friends did. She took one final gaze at Jane's naked body before reluctantly turning the doorknob.

"Hi," Maura said nervously as she opened the door just wide enough to peak in.

"Are you studying for chem?" Stash asked. "The test isn't for another two weeks."

"There's a scrunchie on the door," Maura reminded them. "You _do _know what that symbolizes."

"Maura!" Roxie squealed. "Shut the fuck up! She spent the night again?"

"We haven't seen you since—" Stash began. "Maura, you finally did it?"

"A few times," Maura bragged.

"Babe, I can hear you," Jane shouted.

"She's still here?" Roxie asked.

Markie tried to push past her. "I wanna say hi to Jane."

"She's naked," Maura told them.

"Hey, Markie," Jane shouted. "It's okay. I have my clothes on now."

After Maura's friends had taken over both beds, Jane playfully pulled Maura toward her by the knot tied around her robe. "You were bragging."

"With good reason," Maura said before leaning in to kiss her. "You were amazing."

"Are you two going to fuck again?" Stash asked. "We haven't even heard about the first time."

"It was perfect," Maura said dreamily. "I feel so much closer to Jane now."

Maura's bed had been taken over by Stash and Roxie, so Jane and Maura decided to take a seat next to Markie on her bed. They knew what the conversation was going to be about and there was no avoiding the topic, so Jane and Maura just decided to go along with it. It was their first time and they might as well enjoy the limelight. _Please don't get under the covers, _Maura wanted to tell Roxie and Stash. _Please don't get under the covers._

"Hey, Markie," Roxie said as she got under the covers. "We saw Maura's vag on Friday night."

"What?" Markie asked in disbelief.

"She saw my _labia_," Maura informed Markie. "Jane's the only one who has seen my vagina."

Jane covered her face in embarrassment. "Maura!"

"Babe," Maura said as she laced her fingers with Jane's. "What we did was beautiful. There's no need to be embarrassed."

"What the—" Roxie screeched as she sprung from the bed and onto the floor. "Maura, why are your sheets so soaked?"

"I was hoping you wouldn't get under the covers," Maura said embarrassedly. She had already forgotten everything she had told Jane about how what they did was beautiful.

"Why?" Stash asked. "Oh, wait. Nevermind. Fuckin' fuckass, Roxie. You just rolled around in girl cum. Two days worth of girl cum."

"I need to shower," Roxie announced. She started squirming and rubbing her skin as the four of them tried and failed to control their laughter. "Bitches, it's not funny! I'm covered in girl cum."

"As opposed to guy cum," Stash pointed out. "You're covered in _that_ every weekend. It's nice to try new things."

"Roxie's gone postal," Markie quipped. "Chill, sleazoid. It's no worse than that time Maura and I saw something white on the side of your lips and you casually wiped it and tried to pass it off as yogurt remnants on your face."

"She walked around like that?" Jane asked in disbelief.

"All the way from frat row," Markie added.

"Roxie is the biggest slut in suite 804," Stash pointed out. While they were talking, Roxie made an attempt at leaving, but Markie grabbed her arm and forced her to stay with them. "Maura is like a close second now. If you keep at it, Jane, Maura will probably be the biggest slut by the end of the semester."

"She's not a slut," Jane said defensively as she held Maura. "Maura and I are seeing each other exclusively. It's not like she's sleeping with other girls."

"Sleeping isn't the word," Stash told her. "It's fucking. You can say it, Jane. You're no longer a virgin. You can cuss like the rest of us."

"I'm getting out of here," Jane announced. "Walk me out, babe?"

"Are you even wearing underwear?" Stash asked Maura.

"Well, if she isn't, she could put on the pair that's just lying on top of the lamp shade," Roxie pointed out.

Markie gave her a playful smack on the arm. "Maura, what the hell were you two doing?"

"Losing our virginity," Maura said nonchalantly. "Jane was practically feral last night. She lasted until the sun came up."

"So, you had multiple Janegasms?" Roxie asked. "Nice."

"Again, this is when I leave," Jane announced. "Babe, stay here. I'll call you later."

"Do you work tonight?" Maura asked.

"Yeah," Jane told her. "Are you going to visit me?"

"I'll bring dinner for you." The two of them were lip-locked until Maura was beamed in the head with her own pillow. She pried her lips from Jane's to find Roxie grinning and waving at them. _I could really go without my friends right now._

"You lovebirds are so gross," Stash told them. "Fight or something already."

"Leave 'em alone," Markie said in their defense. "They're kinda cute, I guess, in an annoying way."

"I'm your Jane," she whispered into Maura's ear.

"I'm your Maura," Maura whispered in return.

Jane blew her a kiss before heading out the door. "Bye, my Maura."

Although her friends were watching her, Maura caught Jane's kiss and placed it on her lips. "I'll see you tonight, my Jane."

"Bye, my Jane. Bye, my Maura," Roxie mimicked once Jane was gone.

"Bye, my breakfast," Stash added.

Although she loved her friends, all Maura wanted at that moment was to be alone. She was exhausted and she needed to get some more sleep. She set her alarm clock to go off in an hour, so she'd have time to shower and wash her sheets before going to The Basement to meet Jane. She may not have been her girlfriend, but she was her Jane—and _only _her Jane just like she was Jane's Maura.


	10. Welcome To Mediocrity

**A/N: Thanks so much for the fic love. I hope you all enjoy this slightly longer chapter. :)**

The walk from Maura's freshman composition class to her dorm typically lasted around twenty minutes, but that afternoon Maura made it in less than fifteen. At the end of class, her professor handed back their essays and Maura had been excited about receiving her first graded assignment as a college student. All throughout high school, Maura had never received any grade below an A, so she was horrified when she turned to the second page of her essay and saw her fate. There, in red ink, was a letter D followed by the words, "_I expected better from you, Miss Isles."_ There was no constructive criticism or any explanation as to why she was given a D. What exactly her professor expected, Maura wasn't sure. All she knew was that she had gotten a D on the first graded assignment of her college career.

While down the hall from her dorm room, Maura took out the _Slangtionary_ her friends had made for her that defined different slang terms they used on a regular basis. She was angry with Professor Bell for the grade he had given her and the words to accurately describe her feelings weren't in her own vocabulary, so she decided to borrow some words from her friends.

Maura slammed the door behind her when she entered her dorm. The noise nearly made her friends jump, but Maura was too focused on what she was about to say to notice. "Professor Bell is a…" she paused while scanning the _Slangtionary _for the right word. "Professor Bell is a—a—_douchebag_!"

"Good job, Maura," Stash said from her spot on Maura's bed. "You're learning."

Out of the three of them, Markie was the only one to get off her seat and approach Maura. "What happened?" Without giving her an answer, Maura wrapped her arms around Markie and started crying into her shoulder.

"It probably has something to do with _this_," Stash said as she grabbed the essay from Maura's hands. "Maura, he gave you a D? Maura, you're _capable _of a D? I thought you were like some freaky genius or something. Did you write this while you were sleeping?"

"No," Maura sobbed.

"Shut up, Stash," Markie said angrily. "It took her three days."

Roxie snatched the paper out of Stash's hands. "This isn't so bad, Maur. It's easy to get good grades in Bell's class. I didn't even turn my paper in or go to class today and I got an A."

"How?" Stash asked, although she wasn't sure she wanted to know the answer.

"I fucked him," Roxie said nonchalantly.

"You had sex with Professor Bell?" Maura asked. "He's fifty."

"So?" Roxie shrugged. "What's wrong with that?"

"Roxie, you're _seventeen_," Maura pointed out.

"She knows she's a walking felony," Stash added.

"Why don't we get back on topic?" Markie asked. "Don't let this D get you down, Maur. It's just one essay. It's not your final grade."

"And Bell throws out your worst grade," Roxie informed her.

"Anything below a C is failing. If I fail, I'll have to repeat the class and I can't fit that into my schedule," Maura said matter-of-factly. "I won't get Phi Beta Kappa or any other academic honors and I might not get into medical school."

"Yes, you will," Markie reassured her. "You just need to chill for a bit and then focus on the next essay."

"He didn't leave any comments for me so I'm not sure what I need to change," Maura informed her. "All he wrote is that he expected better from me."

Without a warning, Roxie pulled Maura onto her bed. The unexpected gesture caused Maura to fall on top of her, face-to-face. It felt innocent enough until Roxie started speaking. "Now I know what Jane feels like."

Maura quickly rolled off of her and huddled in between the wall and her pillow. She had been teased all throughout her childhood and teenage years, but she had her intelligence and good grades to fall back on. This was the first time Maura had ever felt worthless.

"Just have sex with Bell," Roxie said. Her words pulled Maura from her thoughts and she couldn't believe her friend had the audacity to suggest that. "It's no big deal, Maura. You're eighteen and he likes girls our age."

"I would never do such a thing!" Maura said angrily. "I would never sell my body for grades. There are so many reasons, Roxie. Did you forget about Jane? I'm her girl and I'm faithful to her."

"You're cute, Maura," Roxie told her in a condescending tone.

"Hey, you guys," Stash said to get their attention. "There's another way to improve Maura's grades and it doesn't involve fucking a professor or studying."

"I _like _studying," Maura pointed out.

"But this is more fun," Stash insisted.

Markie leaned in, ready for whatever Stash had to tell them. "What is it?"

Stash slowly rubbed her hands together in anticipation for what she was about to tell them. "We could kill Roxie."

"What?" Maura asked. Although she had wanted her friends to think she was appalled, she quickly got up and scooted over to where Stash was sitting.

"If your roommate and—I'm assuming suitemate—commits suicide, you get straight A's," Stash informed them. "We could kill Roxie and make it look like she committed suicide."

"No, no way. Fuck you guys," Roxie said before covering her face with a pillow. When she realized it would be too easy for them to suffocate her in that position, she tossed the pillow aside.

"That's just an urban legend," Maura told them. "It's never happened."

"_Yet,_" Markie corrected her. "It's never happened _yet_. We could do this. I think Maura should do the honors."

"Why does Maura get to kill her?" Stash asked. "It was my idea and I'm the one who is forced to live with her."

"Think about it," Markie began. "Maura could probably make the cleanest cuts or come up with some method that doesn't even involve Roxie bleeding out. If we were killing her with a hacksaw, I would totally let you do it, Stash, but this has to look like suicide and Maura is just awesome with anatomy."

"Okay, cool," Stash said excitedly. "Maura, you in?"

"I'm in," Maura responded without giving it another thought. "I might have a scalpel."

Roxie tried to get up, but the three of them held her down. "You guys can't be serious. C'mon. Don't do this," she pleaded.

"We have to for our grades," Stash insisted. "Markie and I really don't want to fail and Maura has her whole future to worry about if she doesn't pass freshman comp."

"What are you going to do to me?" she asked worriedly.

"Just a few quick, clean cuts," Markie said nonchalantly. "No big."

"No big?" Roxie asked through her sobbing. "I thought we were friends, Markie. And fuck you, Maura."

Stash let out a maniacal laugh. "Are those your last words?"

"No," Roxie screamed. "Please don't hurt me. I'll do anything."

"Anything?" Maura asked.

"Anything," Roxie pleaded.

Maura, Stash, and Markie all exchanged glances as they waited for just the right moment to put Roxie out of her misery. "Never, and I mean _never_, suggest that I have sex with Professor Bell ever again," Maura said as she gripped Roxie's shoulders.

"Wait, what?" Roxie asked with a confused look on her face.

"In other words, don't fuck with Maura," Markie said forcefully.

"We can get a little protective," Stash added.

"So this was a joke?" Roxie asked. "You bitches! I hate you all. Just—fuck you guys. I hate you guys. I'm gonna kill you all so hard. So hard. Maura makes one joke in her whole life and it's this. You demented ass bitches. I want new friends."

"No, you don't," Stash said as she pinched her cheeks. "You're kinda cute when you're all mad. I'd kiss you, but I don't know where your mouth has been. Correction, I _know _where your mouth has been which is why I don't want to kiss you."

Before Markie and Maura could stop her, Roxie grabbed Stash by the collar of her shirt and pulled her in for a kiss. Markie and Maura were far too shocked to do anything, so they turned away and made a failed attempt at small talk.

"Oh, for fuck's sake," Stash said as she moved as far away from Roxie as she possibly could. "I think I have syphilis now. Maura, cure me!"

"I think she enjoyed it a little too much," Roxie announced. "She has a girl boner for me."

"Gross," Stash said with a disgusted look on her face.

Markie and Maura wanted to tease them for as long as they could, but they were interrupted by the sound of someone knocking on their door. "She's finally here," Markie told Maura. "I called your lover girl while you were busy arguing with Roxie. I figured you might want her around."

Maura rushed over to the door and practically flung it open now that she knew Jane was on the other side. Her Jane, her beloved Jane had heard about her grade and rushed over to her. _She's so perfect_. Had her friends not been there, Maura would have Jane pinned against the wall, but since they had an audience she settled for the opportunity to rest her head on Jane's shoulders.

"Markie told me what happened," Jane said as she caressed Maura's back. "My poor girl."

"My Jane is here," Maura said softly. She felt her worries fade away the moment Jane gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"I made you a card," Jane said. "It's not really a card. It's more like a piece of lined paper that I folded a few times and wrote on with a pencil. I would have given you something nice, but I wanted to hurry over here."

Maura had expected a heartfelt note or at least something sweet, but she unfolded the sloppy piece of notebook paper to reveal a note that read, "_Welcome to mediocrity. Love, Jane_."

"One of us! One of us!" Maura's friends started to chant.

"Do you mind if I borrow her?" Jane asked them.

"Go ahead," Markie told Jane. "I guess we'll allow you some time alone with your girl."

Maura's friends were going to let the two of them have the room to themselves, but Jane didn't like what that insinuated. Now that they had started having sex, it was all their friends expected them to do together, but Jane and Maura wanted more from each other.

They decided to take a walk around Maura's campus. It was still bustling in the afternoon, but Maura knew of a secluded spot in which they could be alone and focus solely on each other. When they found a spot beneath a tree, Maura took it upon herself to sit sideways on Jane's lap. It was a chilly October day and Maura had forgotten to put on a jacket, so Jane took off her zip-up hooded sweatshirt and put it on Maura.

"Your arms are cold," Maura said worriedly.

"I'm fine," Jane insisted. "I like the way you look in my clothes."

"And I like the way you look out of your clothes," Maura admitted.

"I knew you were using me for my body," Jane quipped. "I knew it! You can continue if you want."

"Stop," Maura laughed.

"Are you feeling better?" Jane asked.

"I can momentarily forget about it, but nothing will change my D," Maura told her. "I got a D, babe. This has never happened to me before."

"You're not used to that grading system," Jane pointed out. "It's all arbitrary."

"How so?"

"You're used to facts, Maura, and you're used to your grades being based on how well you know and present these facts," Jane paused to give her a quick kiss. "In this essay, you had to analyze a couple of quotes. That's not you, Maura. If the writer says the chair is blue, you think, 'Okay, the chair is blue.' You don't go on for five pages about how it represents something from his childhood or whatever is happening in the book. It's not your fault, Maura, and it doesn't make you any less smarter than you were before you wrote that paper."

"Sometimes the chair is just blue," Maura pointed out.

"Sometimes, the chair is just fucking blue," Jane agreed.

"Jane?"

"Yes, babe?"

Maura took a deep breath. "I love you—your beanie. I love your beanie."

"You love my beanie?" Jane asked. As much as Maura loved Jane's beat-up olive green beanie, she had so desperately wanted to tell Jane that she loved _her_, but she worried about it being too soon.

"Yes," Maura said nervously. "I love your beanie."

Jane took the beanie off of her head and placed it securely on Maura. "It looks good on you. Anything would look good on you."

"I'll give it back to you next time I see you," Maura promised.

"Keep it," Jane insisted. "Years from now, we'll look at the beanie and remember the day you became a mediocre genius."

While sitting under the tree that afternoon, Jane filled Maura's heart with hope and comfort without having to try. Maura knew it came naturally to her and what they were telling each other was in all sincerity. When Jane said they were going to be together years from now, Maura knew she meant it. She wasn't her girlfriend yet, but she was already falling in love with her and, that night, as she laid down with Jane's beanie still on her head, thoughts of her grade faded away and all she could focus on was everything she wanted to experience with Jane.


	11. Ode To Jane

A week had passed since the last time Jane and Maura had seen each other and Maura was experiencing what her friends called Jane withdrawals. During their days apart, she had begun wearing Jane's beanie and a hooded sweatshirt that Jane had left at her dorm the last time they saw each other, but it still didn't compare to having Jane's arms wrapped around her. They talked on the phone whenever they could, but with midterms and Jane's work schedule, even their phone conversations were few and far in between. Still, Jane was in her heart and in her thoughts and she was counting the days until she could see her again.

While seated at the dining hall before class, Roxie and Markie were starting to take notice of some changes in Maura. Their once fashionable friend was now wearing Jane's hooded sweatshirt, Jane's beanie, some black tights under her denim shorts, and an oversized band t-shirt that they assumed had once belonged to Jane. Instead of talking to them, she was writing in a notebook that she refused to let them read. When she began singing a Nirvana song under her breath, it was the final straw for Markie and Roxie.

"Who are you and what have you done with Maura Isles?" Markie asked. She pulled the beanie off of Maura's head to reveal messy hair underneath. "I know my best friend is in here somewhere."

"And what's this notebook all about?" Roxie asked. Before Maura could stop her, Roxie grabbed the notebook and started to read it aloud to Markie and Maura. "_All I ever wanted, all I ever needed is here in my arms._"

"Those are Depeche Mode lyrics," Markie pointed out.

"There's like no order to this notebook," Roxie said as she flipped through the pages. "There's scribbling and doodling and words everywhere. Aww, but listen to this. _Five things I like about Maura—"_

Maura snatched the notebook from Roxie. "That's private!"

"Maura, chill," Markie told her.

"Yeah, like don't spazz," Roxie added.

"Nobody other than Jane and myself can read what's inside that notebook," Maura informed them. "We use it to write notes to each other or lyrics from songs that are special to us. Sometimes we use it to write things we're too shy to say aloud."

"It's pretty lame," Roxie said nonchalantly. "Except for your poem entitled 'Ode To Jane's Va—"

Roxie was interrupted by Maura's hand covering her mouth. "You weren't supposed to read that. That's only for Jane."

"Maura, you wrote something that perverted?" Markie asked. "I'm impressed."

"It wasn't meant to be perverted," Maura pointed out. "The title is misleading. Jane was helping me with my analytical writing after that D I was given on my essay and, to unwind, we started writing poems about our first time together. They're all poorly written and make absolutely no sense, but they're special to us and, I'll repeat, private."

"What's with the big yellow star on one of the pages?" Roxie asked.

Maura held out her wrist and slightly rolled one of her sleeves up to reveal a bracelet with threads that were starting too look tattered. "Jane gave me this wish bracelet on our first date. It was the first time I had ever wished for anything and, when I told her that, she said we had to make up for lost time, so we spent the rest of the evening looking up at the stars and making wishes while she held me close to her. She drew that yellow star in this notebook two weeks ago and I drew one for her that she now has hanging in her room. These are our wishing stars and, every time we're apart, we look at our stars and wish for a chance to be together soon."

Maura knew her friends weren't going to be envious of what she had with Jane, but what she didn't expect was for Markie to shake her head and for Roxie to spit out her toast into a napkin.

"I think I just vomited," Roxie announced. "That's like so cheesy, Maura, and like so creep-o."

"Creep-o?" Maura asked. "How is that creep-o?"

"You two are obsessed with each other and have your own little Jane and Maura world," Markie pointed. "You're my best friend, Maura, and I just don't want you to get hurt. She hasn't even asked you to be her girlfriend yet, Maura."

"Mark hasn't asked you either," Maura said defensively.

"Mark and I aren't obsessed with each other, though," Markie pointed out. "We really like each other, but we're just casual. My world doesn't revolve around him and his doesn't revolve around me. You have a girl and that's cool, but don't lose yourself because if she hurts you you'll be lost, Maura, and you won't even know how to find your way back to the girl you once were."

"I won't lose myself," Maura promised. "Thank you for caring so much about me. Nobody besides Jane has ever been so concerned with my well-being."

"Anytime, froom," Markie said to add some levity to the situation.

"I think this calls for a group hug," Roxie added. When her friends stared at her, Roxie immediately changed her tone. "Fine, I didn't want to hug either of you anyway. Screw you guys. If Stash were here, she'd hug me."

"Where is she?" Maura asked.

"She's studying in the library," Roxie pointed out. "She has a history midterm this morning, but my poor girl is exhausted."

Markie gave her a confused look. "Your girl?"

"Yeah, we totally had sex last night," Roxie said a few decibels louder than she should have, but since most of the freshman were used to hearing such statements from her, she hardly drew any attention. "It was so beautiful. I think I'm in love with her, you guys."

"Does she feel the same way about you?" Maura asked.

"I don't know," Roxie shrugged. "But she will. I mean, look at me, I'm so cute. How could she not fall in love with me?"

"Stash doesn't even like girls," Markie pointed out. "Roxie, you don't even like girls. You're having an affair with your professor. You've been passed around frat houses. You hook up with a different football player before each game and call it school spirit. How? What? Ugh, I don't even know what I'm saying."

"How did this happen?" Maura asked since her best friend couldn't form any questions.

"We were like drunk last night," Roxie responded. "So, I don't know exactly how it happened, but it was still beautiful. Plus, she tastes amazing. I didn't know girl cum could taste so good. I want it all the time now. I think I'm going to be a girl cum guzzler. Is that how you are with Jane?"

Maura looked down in hopes of avoiding any follow up questions. "Jane and I have never had oral sex."

"What?" Roxie asked in disbelief. "Then, like what have you done?"

They were the questions Maura had been dreading, but she knew there was no way of getting out of them. "We've agreed to hold off on oral sex and penetration until we're officially a couple. Neither of us are ready, but that doesn't mean making love to each other is any less passionate."

"I know I sound like a broken record, but what do you do?" Roxie repeated.

"Manual stimulation without penetration," Maura said nonchalantly.

"So you like rub each other's clits?" Roxie asked in disbelief. "That's it?"

"Tribadism is also very enjoyable and _very _intimate," Maura pointed out. "That's our favorite sexual activity."

"I'll have to try that with Stash," Roxie said excitedly. "I need new ways to blow her mind. Before the semester is over, she's going to be worshipping me. But, like, I just realized something. I've gone down on a girl and Maura hasn't. That means I'm more of a lesbian than Maura!"

"That means this conversation is over," Markie announced. "How dare you compare a drunken hook up to the love and intimacy between Jane and Maura. You can't just hook up with a girl and call yourself a lesbian, Roxie. That kind of trivializes actual lesbian relationships. Jane and Maura aren't just playing with each other to get off. They really care about each other."

"I care about Stash," Roxie said defensively.

"You care about sex," Markie told her. "And this is just a new way of getting it. You can say you're bisexual or you just want to experiment and I'll accept that, but don't start trivializing Maura's feelings and the intimacy she has with Jane."

Without saying another word to them, Roxie grabbed her tray and left. Markie hadn't wanted to upset her, but she knew someone had to get the message through to her. Neither Markie nor Maura knew what to say to each other after Roxie had left, so they decided to return to their room so Maura could grab her backpack before class.

"Was I too hard on her?" Markie asked. "I just felt like she was making fun of you and I hate when she does that. You and I know what's it like to be made fun of and to be the outsider for so many different reasons. When you were made fun of in high school and junior high, was it by girls like her?"

"Yes," Maura admitted, although she was trying to forget about her entire adolescent existence.

"She was captain of the varsity cheerleading squad, she was Homecoming Queen, and voted Most Desirable," Markie recited. "She's like Susie High School and sometimes I think she still hasn't left those years. Roxie thinks the whole world revolves around her and everyone loves her."

"But she's our friend," Maura pointed out. "I don't understand why you're saying these things about her."

"You really do understand dead people more than live ones," Markie quipped. "You're such a gem, Maura. I'm glad we're frooms."

* * *

Jane stood outside the door to Maura's dorm room, playing with the hem of her t-shirt. She had gone to room 804B with a purpose, but the more she thought about her purpose the more nervous she became. She knew Maura was in class, which is why she had chosen that particular moment to go to Maura's room. Seeing Maura later would be a plus, but her intentions were to see Markie and ask her what just might be the third most important questions she will ever ask anyone; the second being, according to Jane, asking Maura to be her girlfriend and the first being asking Maura to marry her, but she was years away from the most important question, which eased her mind somewhat and helped her focus on the third and second most important questions.

After a couple of minutes of deliberating, Jane finally worked up the nerve to knock on the door.

"Jane, what's up?" Markie asked after she had let her in. "Maura won't be back for a couple of hours, but you can chill in here until then."

"I didn't come here to see Maura," Jane said nervously. "Well, I did, but that's not the only reason. I came here because I wanted to ask you a question."

"Have a seat," Markie insisted. When Jane sat on Maura's bed, the very place where she had spent so many hours holding Maura and making love to her, she was immediately put at ease.

"I know how old-fashioned this seems, but since I can't ask Maura's mom for permission, I wanted to ask you," Jane began. "It's probably better that I ask you, anyway, because you know Maura better than her mom does."

"C'mon, Jane, spit it out," Markie urged her. "You knocked her up, didn't you? You knocked up my best friend. Damn it, Jane. I knew it was only a matter of time. Now I insist that you marry Maura and make an honest woman out of her."

"That's exactly what I did," Jane quipped. "Maura is with child and now I must ask for her hand in marriage."

Markie shook her head. "You're such an asshole, Jane, which is why I love you."

"Thanks, I think," Jane said hesitantly. "I love you, too, and I'm hoping you'll give me permission to—"

"To what?" Markie interrupted. "Jane, I hate the suspense here."

"I'm hoping you'll give me permission to ask Maura to be my girlfriend," Jane said quickly.

"Permission granted," Markie told her. "Under one condition."

"What?" Jane asked.

"Never and I mean _never _break her heart," Markie demanded. "You're her world, Jane, and I don't want her world to come crashing down around her."

Jane had suddenly become shy. "I'm her world?"

"Yes!"

"She's my world, too," Jane admitted. "Maura is the best thing to ever happen to me, which is why I want her to be my girlfriend."

"Good," Markie told her. "Oh and I hope you're not also asking her to be your girlfriend so she could go down on you. Maura told us all about how you two are saving that until you're a couple."

"She told you," Jane groaned. "Maura!"

"Well, now you can really rock her world," Markie teased. "How are you going to ask her? And when?"

The blush returned to Jane's cheeks. "This weekend, but I can't tell you how. I have something special planned for her. Maura is used to people giving her material things, but I want to give her experiences, the kind that make her feel special."

"Jane?"

"Yeah?" Jane asked, still worried that Markie would change her mind about granting her permission.

"I'm glad Maura has you."

"I'm glad Maura has _you_," Jane told her. "She deserves a best friend."

"And a girlfriend," Markie added. "And I don't think anyone in this world could be a better girlfriend for her than you'll be."

Jane waited in Maura's dorm room in hopes of seeing her even for a few minutes before she had to leave for work. She had requested the entire Saturday off to spend with Maura and, although, there were still four days left she was going to start preparing everything for the moment she'd ask Maura to be her girlfriend.


	12. Dort the Maurfriend Has A Janefriend

**A/N: This is the longest chapter I've ever written, but it's a special moment for them so I couldn't resist. Thank you so much to those who decided to leave some love for the previous chapter. It was greatly appreciated. Now, it's time to journey back to Fall 1994. :)**

* * *

After what felt like an eternity of waiting, Saturday had finally approached. Maura hadn't seen Jane since Monday, which is also the last time she had talked to her. There was something unusual about the way Jane had acted with her on Monday; she was distant, which worried Maura. She wanted to ask Jane if everything was okay with her and okay between the two of them, but whenever she called, Jane would say she was busy and she couldn't talk. There would be promises to call her later, but those calls never came and Maura was left to wonder what had happened. On Thursday night, after the tenth unreturned phone call, Maura was about to go to The Basement to check up on Jane, but Stash pinned her to the ground as Roxie and Markie struggled to get Maura's car keys out of her hand. They knew Maura had nothing to worry about and Jane was just being avoidant because she was nervous about their upcoming date, but none of them would say Jane had something special planned for her even if meant putting Maura's mind at ease.

"Dort!" Stash shouted as she forcefully opened the door. "Dort! I have something for you!"

Ever since her friends had read her full name on her BCU student identification card a few days ago, they had begun calling her 'Dort.' Maura wasn't exactly fond of this new abbreviation of her middle name, but she applauded their creativity even if their creative moment was a result of drunkenness.

"Babe, is it time? Is it time?" Roxie asked after thwarting Stash's attempts at keeping her out of Markie and Maura's room.

"Roxanne! Get out of here!" Stash said, trying unsuccessfully to curb her frustration. "You're gonna fuck it all up. And what did I say about calling me 'babe?'"

"Sorry, babe," Roxie told her. "Oops! It's just a habit now. If you'd like I can start saying that cute little nickname I call you after we've—"

"Roxanne!" Stash interrupted. "Get in bed and I'll be there in a few minutes."

"Roxie, what is it time for?" Maura asked. Her curiosity increased when her friends started exchanging glances.

"Hammertime!" Roxie said before nervously singing "U Can't Touch This."

There was no more hiding Stash's frustration. "Roxanne Michelle Cooper!"

"Okay, okay. Don't be such a spazz. There's some vodka under my bed," Roxie reminded her. "Can I lick it off of you?" Before leaving, she turned to Maura and winked at her. "Maybe you should lick something off of Jane…or just _lick_ Jane."

"When did you become a couple?" Markie asked once they were sure Roxie was gone.

"They aren't," Maura responded.

"She thinks we are," Stash pointed out. "She also thinks Ace of Base is, and I quote, 'like the best band ever!' which goes to show how delusional she can be, but I don't know. She's kinda growing on me like an infected, puss-filled sore so we'll see what happens. Anyway, Dort, a gift for you just randomly showed up in front of my door. Gift gnomes probably took it from your door and put it near mine. Fucking gnomes, man."

Maura gingerly unwrapped the gift that was left for her. It was crudely wrapped and there was no label on it, so Maura hoped the gift itself would help her determine whom it was from. All of her questions were answered instantaneously when she ripped the paper and saw a cassette and a picture of herself kissing Jane.

"She _isn't _mad at me," Maura announced for a lack of anything better to say.

"Jane? Mad at you?" Markie asked. "She's been avoiding you because she's so nervous. She wasn't going to tell us anything, but she told Mark and Mark told me and I told Stash and Stash told Roxie and now we're all involved in something."

"What are you involved in?" Maura asked, but Markie refused to answer her question. Instead she pulled out a note and began to read it aloud.

"_Maura, it's Jane. I miss you so much when we're apart, but I'm hoping the songs on the tape will remind you of the times we've spent together. You told me last month that no one had ever written a song for you and I'm definitely not a songwriter so I decided I'd do the next best thing. All of these songs were chosen with you in mind. Side A has songs that we've heard while we were in your car or in your dorm and Side B is filled with songs that describe exactly how I feel about you. Because we mix so well together, it's called the Jane and Maura Mix: Fall 1994. I know you're going to want to listen to this, but it can wait until later. Pick out something comfortable to wear, but don't bring a jacket. I know you like wearing mine."_

Maura knew she wasn't supposed to listen to the tape, but she figured it wouldn't hurt to listen to a few songs as she was getting dressed. The first song was "No Rain," which they had recited instead of sang on the night they met each other.

"'Under The Bridge'?" Stash asked as she looked at the track listing. "Nice."

"Jane and I listen to that song all the time," Maura said dreamily. "We know we can't relate to what he is singing about, but we've both loved that song since high school and we think it's beautiful that we used to listen to this song years before meeting. When we realized this, we started telling each other stories about high school and, although our experiences were different, we had this song in common."

"I think Jane is the first person to ever put 'Aneurysm' on a mix tape for a girl," Markie pointed out.

"Pajama Jam," Maura told her.

Markie was confused. "Pajama Jam?"

"Yes," Maura smiled. "I was stressed about a quiz, so as a stress reliever, she suggested Pajama Jam. It was the middle of the day, but we put on pajamas and danced around to the first song we heard."

"'Cream' is on here!" Stash said excitedly. "I love that song! What's the story behind it?"

Maura turned toward her closet so her friends wouldn't see her blush. "You don't want to know."

"Stash," Markie laughed. "It's called 'Cream,' one of the lyrics says 'get on top' and Maura is refusing to look in our direction. I think we know what they were doing when that song was playing."

While telling her friends stories about why Jane had chosen certain songs, Maura grabbed a pair of jeans and a light blue t-shirt that read 'True Blue BCU' in yellow letters. She wasn't sure how casual Jane wanted her to be, so she decided to wear her hair down and wrap a ponytail holder around her wrist just in case she needed it.

Maura wanted to ask her friends how she looked, but all of the attention was taken off of her when they heard a knock at the door. "I'll get it," Markie insisted, but Maura had already rushed to answer it.

"Jane!" she said excitedly. Only five days had passed since she had last seen her, which might have been acceptable for most people, but Maura considered it an eternity. Five days—or even one day—without kissing Jane was almost unbearable. Although Jane considered herself to be strong, she was no match for an overly excited Maura. Maura charged at her like a wild animal and took her down in the process. There was an audience of eight or ten guys and girls in the hallway, but Maura paid no attention to them. She repeatedly gave Jane pecks on the cheek before pressing her lips to hers.

"Dort, I think you broke Jane," Stash said as she observed the scene before her.

"Jane, are you alive?" Markie asked. "Or did you experience death by Dort?"

Her mouth was being occupied by Maura's tongue, so all Jane could do was give them a thumbs up to signal that she was still alive.

"I missed you," Maura said softly. She was looking intently into Jane's eyes for some hint at what Jane might be feeling for her.

"I missed you, too," Jane responded. "Ready to go?"

Maura asked questions about where they were going, but Jane refused to answer any of them. Their destination was going to be a surprise, which made Maura wonder what Jane was doing. As Maura held her hand, she felt how sweaty Jane's palms were.

"Why are you nervous?" Maura asked.

"I'm not," Jane insisted.

"The palm of you hand never feels this way," Maura pointed out. When Jane refused to acknowledge what she was saying, Maura instructed her to pull over. "Jane, it's you and me. You never have to be nervous around me. I'm your Maura and you're my Jane."

"I know," Jane smiled.

"Where are we going?" Maura tried asking again.

"Maura," Jane groaned, although she thought Maura's persistence was adorable.

They pulled into the parking lot of a playground near Jane's house. It was late in the afternoon on a chilly mid-October day, so there weren't any children around. Maura looked out at the deserted jungle gym, slide, and swings. The combination of an empty playground and a gray sky gave Maura an uneasy feeling, but she didn't want to reveal that to Jane. There was a reason Jane brought her there and she couldn't wait to find out what Jane had planned for them.

Maura was going to open the door, but Jane insisted on opening it for her. She held out her hand for Maura to take hold of as she exited the car. Maura felt as if she were in a classic film with a leading lady and a dashing young gentleman—if classic films included a playground and a dashing young gentleman who was actually a teenage girl with ripped jeans and a scrape on her knees from skateboarding.

It had become customary for Jane to take off her jacket and hand it over to Maura at the beginning of their dates. "I know you're cold in just a t-shirt."

"You told me not to bring a jacket," Maura said matter-of-factly. "But I'm worried about you being cold."

"Don't be," Jane told her. "I came prepared. I have a tighter thermal underneath this baggy thermal shirt. Even if I didn't have two shirts, I'd still give up my jacket to keep you warm. We've only known each other for a short time, but I'd still do anything for you."

Maura cuddled up to Jane and rested her head on her shoulder. She was at a loss for words, but she knew Jane wasn't expecting her to say anything because it was one of those moments in which Jane knew what she was saying even when there were no words spoken between them. She couldn't believe any of this was happening to her—not just this moment, every moment she had ever experienced with Jane. She had spent so many years alone, but all of those lonely nights spent without any friends or without a girl who cared about her brought her closer to the night she'd meet Jane.

"You want to know why I brought you to a playground," Jane said matter-of-factly.

"I do," Maura responded.

"When I spent the weekend in your dorm, we told stories about our childhoods and you said that none of the other kids ever wanted to play on the playground with you and so you never actually played on a playground before. I'm not one of the kids you went to school with and we're both eighteen now, but I want to be the first to play on the playground with you."

"You want to play with me?" Maura asked excitedly. She didn't give Jane a chance to respond before she grabbed her hand and nearly pulled her arm out of its socket as they made their way to the playground.

"Let's go on the swings," Jane suggested.

Maura sat down on one of the swings and eagerly started to swing herself. When Jane noticed how much Maura was smiling and giggling, she knew she had made the right decision to bring her there. "I dare you to jump off," Jane said once they were swinging as high as they could go.

Not wanting to admit she was afraid, Maura decided to turn the tables on Jane. "I double dare you to jump off."

"No problem," Jane scoffed. She had done this dozens of times as a child with only one or two accidents. Jane had expected another perfect landing, so she was surprised when she lost her footing and scraped her knee.

"Jane!" Maura said worriedly. She brought her swing to a stop as quickly as she could and rushed over to Jane. "Babe, you're bleeding!"

"I'm fine," Jane insisted. "It's just a scrape, Maur. It's no worse than the one I got while skateboarding." Maura gave her a quick but affectionate pat on the shoulder before making her way over to her purse. "Babe, what are you doing?"

She knew Maura was overreacting, but she still smiled when she saw that Maura had returned with a miniature first aid kit. She opened the kit and pulled out an adhesive bandage, some peroxide, and a piece of gauze. "I don't want your cut to get infected." She poured some peroxide on Jane's cut and wiped the excess off with some gauze. The peroxide left Jane with a stinging sensation but she hardly noticed it. She was so focused on Maura taking care of her that she felt no pain. After Maura placed a bandage over her scrape, she gave Jane's knee a quick kiss.

"Thank you, Dr. Isles," Jane said affectionately.

"I'm not a doctor yet," Maura blushed. "I'm still an undergraduate, a freshman undergraduate."

Jane leaned in to kiss her. "But I like the way that sounds. Dr. Maura Isles. You're going to do so many great things and you deserve the best."

"I already have the best," Maura pointed out. "I have you. I have Officer Rizzoli, maybe Detective Rizzoli someday."

"I'm years from being a cop," Jane said while trying not to let Maura see how shy she was becoming. "Right now, I'm just eighteen-year-old Jane who goes to school, works at The Basement, and freelances as a batting coach for little girls who want to be softball players."

"I like you for who you are right now _and _who you're going to be in the future," Maura told her. "You're my Jane."

"Have you ever played in a pile of leaves?" Jane asked, well aware that she was changing the subject. The moment she had been waiting weeks for was finally going to happen and she didn't want to wait another second.

"No," Maura shook her head. "But today is a day for first times."

There was a pile of crunchy autumn leaves underneath a nearby tree and Jane affectionately tackled Maura who, in turn, grabbed a handful and sprinkled them over Jane's torso. There were leaf fights interrupted by kisses and, although she had spent so many moments with Maura, Jane had never seen her have this much fun or be this carefree. She liked this side of Maura and she was glad she was the one to bring it out of her.

"Crap," Jane said as she emerged from the pile of leaves Maura had placed on top of her. "I lost my work schedule. It was in my back pocket and it must have slipped out."

The two of them started digging through the leaves and Maura was more concerned about Jane's missing work schedule than Jane was. Jane lazily dug as Maura frantically searched for it. "Is this it?" she asked as she held up a white piece of a paper. "I think I found it."

"Read it to me?" Jane asked. "I forgot if I go in tomorrow."

Maura was about to lecture Jane on being more responsible until she read what was really written on that folded piece of paper. "_Be my girlfriend?_" Maura scanned the paper again to make sure she was reading it correctly. She looked at the paper, then looked up at Jane, and looked at the paper again.

"Will you?" Jane asked. "I really care about you, Maura, and I know I'm going to fall in love with you. You're everything I've ever wanted in a girl and if you'd do me the honor of being my girlfriend, I promise to never break your heart. I know I shouldn't say that lightly and I'm not. When I say I'll never break your heart, I mean it. I'll be your Jane for as long as you'll let me be."

"Under one condition," Maura said. She had a calm exterior although she felt like running around like an excited little girl.

"What?"

Maura moved closer to her so they could hold each other amongst the pile of leaves. "Will you be my girlfriend in turn?" Maura asked. "I'll be your Maura and your girlfriend—"

"My Maurfriend?" Jane interrupted.

"You've been spending too much time with my friends," Maura said jokingly. "But, yes, I'll be your Maurfriend and you can be my Janefriend."

"Maura, we're a couple," Jane realized. "We're officially a couple. I have no idea what we're supposed to do now. I've never had a girlfriend before and I've especially never had a Maurfriend."

"Maybe we should kiss," Maura suggested.

These were their first kisses as Janefriend and Maurfriend and, although they were no different than the kisses they had shared before they were a couple, both girls agreed that they were better because there was commitment, adoration, and two affectionate, albeit unusual, titles of Janefriend and Maurfriend to match. Jane and Maura spent the rest of the afternoon kissing each other in the pile of leaves until they decided to go out to dinner to celebrate becoming a couple. Her friends were going to endure hour after hour of sentences that began with the words, 'My girlfriend Jane,' but Maura didn't care. Jane was her first girlfriend and she couldn't help fantasizing about Jane being the girl she'd spend the rest of her days with.


	13. Love, Batman, and Rainbow Brite

A week had passed since Jane and Maura had become a couple and, although they had made love to each other a few days later in the backseat of Maura's car, they had yet to take that next step. It was the topic of most of their conversations, but neither Jane nor Maura had attempted to take their sexual relationship to that level. Maura's friends described it as the best sexual experience a woman could have and Maura wanted that not for herself but for Jane. Maura had yet to tell her so, but she was falling in love with Jane and the feeling intensified every moment they were together. Jane Rizzoli was not only her girlfriend and her best friend; she was her anchor. Whenever she needed someone, Jane was there to hold her and to kiss her or just to listen to her when she had something to say. With Jane's reassurance, any worries Maura had would fade away and she hoped that night would be no different.

Making love to Jane was the most pleasurable experience of Maura's young life, but she was worried about what it would be like to make love to Jane in a way they had never experienced before. The night they were going to lose their virginity to each other, Maura had worried about whether Jane would like her body or if she'd be able to satisfy Jane, but after that first time Jane eased her worries. Jane _loved _her body and she loved Jane's. They both were able to satisfy each other sexually even if they were slightly awkward at first. But that night brought new insecurities for Maura. What if Jane didn't like the way she tasted? What if Jane was disgusted when she went down on her? Even worse, what if she didn't like the way _Jane _tasted? Would she have to continue until Jane had an orgasm? _I can't hurt her feelings_, Maura thought. _I love her and loving her means loving all of her. _Then there was the possibility of Jane being inside of her. She wondered if Jane would start with one finger or two. Would she be gentle? Maura had found herself obsessing over the length of her girlfriend's fingers on more than one occasion and how she'd be able to use them on her, but even though she wanted to have Jane inside of her, she worried about Jane penetrating her too deeply.

Jane was due to arrive in less than a half an hour and with her friends going out for the sole purpose of giving Maura time alone with Jane, Maura went to work on creating a romantic atmosphere in her dorm. She wanted everything to be perfect down to the last detail because, before the night ended, she was going to tell Jane that she loved her. Her friends had told her it was too soon, but Maura couldn't hold the feeling inside of her any longer. She had to tell Jane and she hoped Jane was feeling the same way she was.

In a matter of minutes, Maura's dorm room was transformed into their own honeymoon suite complete with candles on her desk and dresser and rose petals arranged in the shape of a heart on top of her bed. All that was left was for Maura to get dressed. She had never worn lingerie and she knew Jane wanted her even if she didn't wear it, but that night wearing lingerie felt appropriate. Maura Isles had gone from feeling like an awkward girl to being a sensual woman over the course of a semester and she knew this transformation was because of Jane.

Just as she had put the finishing touches on her slightly teased hair, Maura heard a knock at the door. Before answering, she quickly checked her appearance in front of the bathroom mirror. Her black thigh-highs were still in place and the left strap on her sheer negligee was hanging off her shoulder just as she had hoped.

"Come in," she said once she had positioned herself near the arranged rose petals on her bed.

The room may have been only illuminated by candlelight, but it was all Maura needed to know that her girlfriend had been pleasantly surprised. She had forgotten that she wasn't wearing any panties under her negligee when she sat up with her legs slightly spread. "Jane?" she asked, but Jane was rendered speechless. "Babe?"

"Where's my girlfriend?" Jane said jokingly. "Her name is Maura and the last time we had sex she was wearing a pair of Rainbow Brite panties that she had bought with Markie for nostalgic reasons."

"I love my Rainbow Brite panties," Maura said defensively.

"I know you do," Jane responded. She tried her hardest not to look between Maura's legs, but she couldn't resist. "I'm just saying you aren't wearing them or _any_."

"Jane!" Maura knew Jane would be getting an even closer look at her, but she was still embarrassed that she had let herself be consumed by her libido. "All she has to do is walk into the room and my legs automatically spread."

"Is that bad?" Jane smirked.

"I said that aloud?"

"Afraid so," Jane told her. "But, for the record, I like when your legs spread for me."

Once again, Maura was grateful for the levity that her girlfriend added to situations just to make Maura feel at ease. "I attempted to create a romantic atmosphere for you."

"It's…nice," Jane said hesitantly as she looked around at the candles and the rose petals arranged on top of the bed. "I'm sorry I didn't notice them earlier, but I'm a horny teenage girl and all I can focus on right now is my girlfriend with her legs spread."

"Jane?"

"Yes, babe?"

"Can you help me blow out the candles?" Maura asked worriedly. "Markie and I got our microwave taken away because we burned something and the smoke detectors went off. The entire building had to be evacuated. If it happens one more time, we're banned from campus housing next semester."

Jane and Maura hurriedly blew out the candles, but Jane couldn't help sneaking a peak as her girlfriend slightly bent over to blow out the one on her desk. The image had been forever etched in her mind even as they stood in the middle of her dorm in complete darkness.

"Can we turn the light on?" Jane asked. "I want to look at you when we make love."

It was a simple request, but the reason Jane wanted the light on was yet even more proof of why Jane was a perfect girlfriend and why she was ready to take the next step with her.

"Is there anything you want to talk about?" Maura asked.

"I don't know," Jane shrugged. "I just want to make sure you're ready and you're not doing this because you feel like you have to. I asked you to be my girlfriend, but it wasn't because I want us to do things to each other."

"I know," Maura insisted. "That's not why I want to do this either. Being your girlfriend just makes it all the more intimate. I want to satisfy you in every way I can because I love you."

"You love me?" Jane asked in disbelief.

"I do," Maura confessed. "I love you, Jane. I know it's soon, but—"

"No," Jane insisted. "It's not soon and even if it is it doesn't matter. I love you, too, Maura. I've been wanting to tell you, but Mark said to wait because I might sound clingy and I don't want to be a clingy girlfriend."

"You're not a clingy girlfriend," Maura reassured her. "You're a _perfect _girlfriend. My friends were surprised by how quickly I fell in love with you. They asked me if I was absolutely certain, except they were crude, as usual. Stash said, 'There's one question that will determine if you truly love Jane' and then she proceeded to ask, 'If crocodiles ate Jane's face, would you still want to be her girlfriend?'"

"What did you say?" Jane asked. "And why would I put myself in a situation where a crocodile could eat my face? Were there just two crocodiles or are we talking about an entire group? Because, if it's even more than one crocodile, I think they'd eat more than just my face. I might not even have limbs, Maura, or a torso. I might not even have a head."

"I said I'd still be your girlfriend," Maura happily responded. "Even if you didn't have a head. I'm sorry…that came out wrong."

"Well, _that _puts my mind at ease even if it's a little creepy," Jane said jokingly. "If I ever get my face eaten by a crocodile, I'll still have the girl I love. Mark had a question, too, but his wasn't as creative. Remember, this is Mark we're talking about. He asked, and I quote, 'If she never put out again or even let you touch her rack, would you still want to be with her?' Not quite the same as crocodiles eating my face, but I think you get the point."

"You don't have to worry about that," Maura insisted. "I'm always turned on around you."

"Always?" Jane asked.

"See for yourself," Maura insisted.

She had wondered how Jane was going to react to what she had just requested. Would she start laughing? Would she be unsure about what she should do? Without hesitation, Jane put her hand between Maura's legs and felt her arousal coat her fingers.

Maura watched as Jane then licked her wetness off of her fingers. When she noticed her girlfriend was actually _savoring _her flavor instead of feeling obligated to taste her, Maura felt her insecurities fade away.

"I love the way you taste," Jane whispered into her ear. Her words awakened an animalistic urge within Maura. While Jane was preoccupied with kissing her neck, Maura quickly undid the button on Jane's jeans.

"Can I?" Maura asked, hoping she wasn't pushing her limits.

"Maura, we've done this," Jane reminded her. "You're my girlfriend and you can touch me whenever you want."

"I have something else in mind. Do you trust me?"

"What are you go—"

"Do you trust me?" Maura interrupted. "I don't want to go any further until I know you trust me and, if at any time you're uncomfortable, I want you to tell me."

"Okay," Jane said nervously. She was wondering what Maura had in mind. Thoughts of whips and handcuffs filled her head and she wasn't sure she was up for whatever Maura had planned. _She's your girlfriend, Jane, and she loves you. She isn't going to hurt you_, but she was taken from her thoughts when Maura forcefully pulled down her jeans and her underwear. She had expected whatever Maura had planned to take place in bed, but Jane was standing in the middle of Maura's dorm room with her jeans and underwear around her ankles until Maura finally allowed her to step out of them and put them aside. When Maura remained on her knees, looking up at her, Jane instantly knew what she was in for. _Be cool, Jane. Don't act too excited._

"Babe, don't break eye contact with me," Maura insisted. "It'll heighten the experience."

Jane watched as her girlfriend gripped her thighs and looked up at her for reassurance. She didn't need Jane to say anything, but she needed to know that Jane was ready. Jane tucked Maura's hair behind her ears and Maura took it as a sign that her girlfriend was ready.

Maura felt how much Jane trembled when her tongue came in contact with her clit. It was a slow teasing at first as Maura prepared herself for what she should do next. It was her first experience with oral sex and she wasn't sure _how _she was supposed to go about doing this. After a few maneuvers of her tongue, she decided it was best to stay in tune with Jane and keep doing whatever Jane responded to. Her tongue slowly circled Jane's clit until she was certain her girlfriend wasn't too sensitive. She had worried about not liking the way Jane tasted, but in matter of seconds Maura knew she was already addicted to Jane's flavor. Not only was it a sign of how aroused her girlfriend was, but it was a flavor that was uniquely Jane's and, as her girlfriend, Maura was the only girl who could taste this unique flavor. When Maura gently ran her tongue back and forth across Jane's clit, the two of them broke eye contact for the first time. Her girlfriend's head was slightly tossed back and Maura closed her eyes as she savored what Jane tasted like. Jane's moans and the fact that she was holding on to the back of Maura's head further aroused Maura. She wanted to please Jane, but she also felt a throbbing sensation between her legs that intensified with every noise Jane made. No longer able to control her urges, Maura removed one of her hands from Jane's thighs and used it to pleasure herself. The harder and faster she rubbed herself, the more intensely and _thoroughly _she licked Jane until she felt her girlfriend's entire body start to tense. With Maura's lips pursed around Jane's clit, gently sucking on her girlfriend, Jane had reached her climax. _Maura Isles, you're a swallower,_ she thought as she felt Jane's fluids pass down her throat.

Jane wanted to ask where her girlfriend had learned how to do something like that, but she remembered that Maura had been pleasuring herself and she wasn't going to let her girlfriend finish herself off. Making her girlfriend come was always an ego boost for Jane, but it was about more than her ego or simply getting Maura off this time. Maura was the girl she loved and she was ready for a new form of intimacy with her.

Jane held out her hand to help Maura off of her knees. Maura had expected a kiss, but instead Jane lifted her up and playfully dropped her onto the bed. "It's your turn. I've been wanting to go down on you since the night I met you."

"You said you weren't ready that night," Maura reminded her. She tried to stifle a giggle, but she couldn't control it when Jane started to sloppily kiss her on the neck. She knew it was Maura's ticklish spot and Jane could never resist making her girlfriend giggle.

"I _wasn't_ ready," Jane agreed. "But that doesn't mean I don't fantasize about it every night."

"What else do you fantasize about?" Maura asked.

"I already told you something I fantasize about. Now, it's your turn."

Maura knew there was no need for her to be shy, but she couldn't help it. "I fantasize about feeling you inside of me."

"You want me to—"

"Yes," Maura said softly. "You and I would literally be connected."

Not having done this before, even to herself, Jane wasn't sure where she was supposed to _insert _her fingers. After what felt like an eternity of fumbling, Jane decided to speak up. "Babe, I can't find your hole."

"What?" Maura asked in disbelief. "Jane, are you saying you can't find the opening of my vagina?"

Jane wished she could hide her face with Maura's pillow. "It sounds worse when you put it that way."

"Don't be embarrassed," Maura insisted. As was their usual position, Maura wrapped her legs around Jane's waist to hold her body as closely and securely to hers as she could. Jane lowered her upper body so her lips could meet Maura's. There was a new flavor on Maura's lips and tongue and it dawned on Jane that this new flavor was her.

"I love you so much," Jane said as she continued to look into Maura's eyes.

Maura tucked a few strands of hair behind Jane's ears so there was no longer anything obstructing the view of Jane's beautiful, dark eyes. "I love you, too, and we're going to get better at this."

"Even if we don't, I'm so in love with you that it doesn't matter," Jane admitted.

Maura was grateful that the two of them were on the same page. Jane had her insecurities just as she did, but they could work through them together. "You and I are still so new to this and we're learning what sex is and what feels good and what doesn't, but we're learning together, Jane. That's what's important. My love for you isn't dependent on how many orgasms I have. If we never had sex again, I'd still be in love with you and I'd still want to spend every day with you."

"Even if crocodiles ate my face?" Jane quipped.

"Even if crocodiles ate your face," Maura reassured her.

"I love you, Maurfriend."

"I love you even more, Janefriend."

As content as Maura was with cuddling, Jane remembered that her girlfriend hadn't had an orgasm. Maura may have just given her a talk about how it didn't matter, but it _mattered _to Jane because she wanted Maura to feel as good as Maura had made her feel just minutes ago.

Jane grabbed the hem of Maura's neligee and lifted it up above her waist so she could get a look at her girlfriend. Her swollen clit and the sensitivity Maura felt with a gentle touch made it evident for Jane that Maura was still aroused. Maura was looking at the ceiling for reasons unknown to Jane. Maybe she was anticipating what Jane was about to do. Maybe she was nervous. Regardless, Jane used one hand to spread Maura's lips and the other to hold Maura's hand for reassurance.

It was the moment Jane had fantasized about night after night and she couldn't believe it was about to happen. Jane was eager—maybe too eager—but she knew it was best if she took her time instead of going down on Maura with reckless abandon like she had fantasized. _Jane Rizzoli, you are so gay. You are so very, very gay._ With that in mind, she leaned in to lick her girlfriend for the very first time. Just as she had hoped, tasting Maura came naturally to Jane not because she thought she had any particular skill but because she had so much love for Maura.

Maura responded to every movement of Jane's tongue. She clutched her bed sheets at first, but the harder Jane's tongue stroked her, the more vocal and frenzied Maura became until she unknowingly pulled Jane's hair. Jane had to hold her still as Maura felt her orgasm wrack her body, but unfortunately for Jane she was unable to keep her from clenching her thighs.

"Babe?" Jane called out to get her attention. "My head isn't a walnut. You don't need to crack it."

Maura couldn't believe what she had just done. "I'm sorry," Maura tried to say, but she and Jane had already exploded into a fit of laughter. When Maura playfully pulled Jane next to her, the two of them began laughing all over again.

"You tried to kill me," Jane teased. "My girlfriend is a black widow. You kill after you mate."

"That's a myth," Maura pointed out. She wanted to explain why, but the more she thought about herself as a black widow, the harder it was for her to be serious.

"What?" Jane asked. "It's a myth that they kill or that you kill? I have firsthand experience that _you_ kill after mating. I should make a shirt that says 'I survived sex with Maura Isles.'"

"And I'll make one that says, 'Jane Rizzoli can't find my vagina,'" Maura added.

"That's _low_," Jane gasped. "That stays between us. You better not tell Markie because she'll tell Mark and then I'll never hear the end of it."

"Deal," Maura said. "Pinky swear?"

"Pinky swear," Jane agreed. The two of them linked their pinkies until Jane noticed the difference in colorful beads on the wall. "You're beating Roxie now?"

"By five beads," Maura said proudly. "Six now. We should high-five."

"We should definitely high-five!" Jane said enthusiastically. "Maura, I'm being perfectly honest when I say that strand of beads is the best collaborative effort I've ever been a part of and I hope we continue to work together. Perhaps dinner followed by yet another collaborative effort in your backseat?"

As much as Maura wanted to stay in, her friends were due to arrive in an hour, which meant they would no longer have any privacy, and going out to dinner with Jane followed by a few hours in the backseat sounded like the perfect way to end their night together.

While Jane got dressed, Maura grabbed a pair of panties and a bra from her dresser. "More Rainbow Brite?" Jane groaned. "Maura."

"Yours are _Batman,_" Maura pointed out.

"But Batman is—"

"There's no defending Batman _or _Rainbow Brite," Maura interrupted. "We're going underwear shopping and then to dinner and _then _we'll have time in the backseat."


	14. A Semi Perfect Moment

**A/N: So this is going to be one of those 'to be continued' chapters...**

* * *

The entire Rizzoli family, save for Jane, was going to her paternal grandmother's house to celebrate her birthday. Jane loved her grandmother and her aunts, uncles, and cousins, but she often found herself out of place with them. Her parents and her brothers knew and accepted her for who she was even if there were times when her mother would tell her to dress like a girl, but her extended family was different. Jane's eighteen-year-old cousin, Jessica, had been voted prom queen during her senior year and, as a college freshman, she was already engaged to her high school sweetheart. The two of them adored each other as children—Janie and Jessie, their grandmother called them—but once they turned fifteen, everything changed. Jessica had gone from being a tomboy to dating boys and being obsessed with her hair and make-up, while Jane 'discovered good music and became an asshole' as Mark liked to put it.

With Jessica there, Jane knew she would have to endure an entire evening of her grandmother comparing them and asking why Jane didn't dress feminine like Jessica and why she wasn't seeing anyone. Unlike every other time her grandmother asked her why she wasn't seeing anyone, this time Jane would actually be able to tell her that she wasn't just seeing someone but she was in an actual relationship. Jane wanted nothing more than to tell her grandmother about her girlfriend and how much she loved her, but she knew that wasn't going to happen anytime soon. Jane wasn't out to her grandparents or anyone else from her extended family and she didn't plan on being out to them in the near future. She wasn't afraid of the backlash she'd get—she'd dealt with it from her peers—but she was afraid of what they might say to her parents about not raising her right or their daughter going to hell. Jane knew her lesbianism had nothing to do with the way her parents had raised her, but without a doubt, that would be her grandmother's first accusation.

"Why does Jane get to stay home?" Frankie asked as they were preparing to leave.

Angela took one look at Frankie's backwards cap and immediately turned it around. "Because Janie has a paper due on Monday and she needs to concentrate." It wasn't _exactly _a lie. Jane _did _have a paper due on Monday, but what she hadn't told her mother was that she had already completed it.

"Bullshit!" Tommy said. Now that he was a freshman in high school, he felt it were his right to use swear words even at home.

"Language!" Angela told him.

"Frankie and I have homework, too," Tommy argued. "Why can't we stay home?"

"You and Frankie can do your homework tomorrow," Angela pointed out. "Janie works a seven hour shift tomorrow."

"I bet her girlfriend is coming over the moment we leave," Tommy told Angela.

"Thomas, get in the car," Angela commanded. "Janie, I need to talk to you."

"Maura isn't coming over," Jane promised. "Mark is going to be here for awhile, but nobody else."

"I don't want you two having girls here while we're gone," Frank told his daughter. "And no drinking. I know how Mark is."

"We're both going to be working on our papers," Jane insisted. "Mark is going to read over mine and I'm going to read over his."

"I want to meet your girlfriend soon," Angela told her.

Jane rolled her eyes. "She'll be here on Halloween. That's in two days."

"Maybe this is all a Halloween prank," Frankie brought to their attention. "Jane with a girlfriend?"

"Who'd date Jane?" Tommy asked. "Jane, you have an actual girlfriend? A _human_ girlfriend, not a blow up doll?"

"Get in the car," Angela reiterated.

Jane followed her brothers outside. "Yes, I have a girlfriend, a girlfriend who is an amazing kisser and looks hot in lingerie," she said mischievously. "Have fun at grandma's."

As soon as she was alone, Jane picked up the phone and called Mark. They had both finished their papers and there wasn't much they could do with a thunderstorm expected to hit in a couple of hours, so she wanted to ask him to bring some horror movies over. Mark and Jane had a selection of cheesy horror movies they had watched dozens of times, but they never grew tired of adding their own sarcastic commentary to them or muting them and adding their own dialog instead.

"Yo," Mark answered.

"Bring _Friday the 13__th__,_" Jane commanded.

"I'm not going over, man," Mark said hesitantly. "I'm going to Markie's."

"You're ditching me?" Jane asked. "What's worse is you're ditching me to get laid."

"Don't be such a cock blocker," Mark told her. "I've arranged for you to get laid, too."

"Mark, I have a girlfriend," Jane reminded him. "I don't know what you have planned for me and I don't want to know."

"I know you have a girlfriend and this is gonna work out for both of us," Mark insisted. "I wanna be alone with Markie in her dorm, which means poor Maura has no place to go and, keep in mind, Jane, you have the house to yourself. Do you want Maura to spend her evening in the library or do you want her to spend it with you? With you, all alone, in your bed, with no interruptions?"

"And if I'm caught with her over here, I'll never be trusted again," Jane told him.

"Too late, man," Mark laughed.

Before she could chew him out, Jane heard the doorbell ring. "Once again, I hate you," she said before hanging up.

"You're not happy to see me," Maura said once they were sitting on the couch.

"Maur, I'm always happy to see you," Jane insisted. "I just wasn't expecting to see you while I look like this." She had expected an evening with Mark, so she wore sweats and yet another ripped t-shirt she had stolen from Mark.

"You look sexy," Maura pointed out. "And how is this different from the way you usually dress? The only difference is you've replaced ripped jeans with sweatpants."

"We can't all look like we just got back from a _Seventeen _photo shoot," Jane said jokingly.

"I don't read _Seventeen_," Maura snapped back. "I read an issue of _Cosmo _last month, but I became disinterested when I got to the articles about pleasing a man sexually. I'm far more interested in pleasing a woman, one woman in particular."

Jane leaned in to kiss her. "Which woman?"

"My girlfriend," Maura responded with a confused look on her face. "You, Jane."

"I know," Jane snickered. "Nevermind."

Without saying a word to Jane, Maura quickly got off the couch and walked around the living room. There weren't any family photos in her house, so she was amazed to see how many photographs the Rizzoli family had in their living room. There were framed photos hanging on the wall and propped up on tables and shelves. There was a section devoted to each child as well as a picture of Jane's parents on the day they were married. Maura had never met anyone in Jane's family, but she could already tell so much about them by the photos displayed in the living room.

"Don't look at the Jane section," Jane warned her girlfriend. "It'll make you think differently of me."

After hearing that, Maura rushed over to the section of photos devoted entirely to Jane. There was Jane as a baby, Jane in elementary school, Jane during her awkward years, her senior photo, but what Maura focused on was her prom picture. "You're in a _dress_," Maura pointed out. "You're in a _formal _dress and Mark is wearing a tuxedo. You look beautiful, Jane, and Mark looks very handsome."

"We look okay," Jane said nonchalantly. "Mark and I never wanted to go to the prom, but our parents made us, so we just thought the only way it'd be fun is if we went with each other. He was a jerk and asked me in this grandiose way."

"How does that make him a jerk?" Maura asked.

"He asked me over the intercom, so the whole school heard him," Jane pointed out. "He said, 'Jane, I love you and you'd make me the happiest guy alive if you went to prom with me.' Everyone thought we were a couple after that, but he did it because he wanted to get back at me for losing his Pearl Jam tape."

"That sounds like Mark," Maura smiled. "But, at least you went to prom. My school didn't have prom. I've never even slow danced with anyone."

"You've never slow danced?" Jane asked in disbelief. Maura wasn't given a chance to answer before Jane grabbed her hand and led her to her bedroom. Jane's bedroom was just how Maura had hoped it would be. There were posters of her favorite bands and movies on the wall, a Red Sox pennant, and pictures of her and Mark.

"Are you wondering where the pictures of you are?" Jane asked.

"Yes," Maura responded.

"Close the door," Jane told her.

When Maura closed the door, she saw it entirely covered with pictures of the two of them and pictures of Maura by herself. Some of the pictures were of the two of them kissing, some were silly pictures they had taken with a Polaroid camera, and others were professional-quality pictures that Markie had taken of Maura that were meant especially for Jane.

"I put them there because that's the direction I face when I sleep," Jane pointed out. "And I want you to be the last thing I see when I go to bed and the first thing I see when I wake up in the morning. Our wishing star is there, too."

It was yet another moment that made Maura feel as if Jane were the perfect girl for her. "This is my favorite picture," Maura said as she focused on a picture of the two of them. It was a candid photo that Mark had taken and, instead of looking at the camera, Jane and Maura were looking at each other. "Markie had once told me there's a certain look that we give each other, but I never understood what she was saying until I saw this. You and I belong together, Jane, and we're not the only ones who notice that."

While Maura was waiting for a response, her girlfriend was putting a cassette into her stereo. It was a familiar song for Maura, one that evoked memories of the first time she had made out—as her friends had crudely put it—with Jane. It was in that moment that Maura felt as if her life had changed. It was the first time she had ever been desired and desired someone in turn—one of her many firsts with Jane, her first girlfriend, the first girl she ever made love to, and most importantly her first _love_, her first and only love or so she hoped.

"I think I would have liked prom a lot more if I had gone with you," Jane admitted. "I can picture you in a dress with your hair and make-up done. You'd have been the prettiest girl there. You're the prettiest girl no matter where we go."

"You are," Maura insisted. "Sometimes, I glare at the girls who check you in."

"Check me out?" Jane asked as she tried not to laugh. "I never notice them. I'm always too busy looking at you. Maura, will you do me the honor of allowing me to be the first person to slow dance with you?"

"Yes," Maura smiled. "I was waiting for you to ask me."

It was the perfect song and the perfect moment with her perfect girlfriend. Never before had Maura thought she could use such an adjective to describe her life, but there she was in Jane's arms as they slowly moved to the music.

"Make love to me," Maura whispered into her ear.

They had hours left to themselves and they wanted it to be slow and sensual. As the next song played, Jane leaned in to kiss Maura. Without pulling away from their kiss, Jane lifted up the hem of Maura's shirt until it was above her breasts. Taking the hint her girlfriend was giving her, Maura pulled away to take her shirt off.

"I can feel you better this way," Jane insisted. "It'd be even better if you took your bra off."

"You always want me topless," Maura pointed out. "You can take my bra off in a while, but I want you out of these clothes and in your bed by the time I get back."

Jane had no trouble complying with her request. "Where are you going?" she asked.

"The living room," Maura responded. "I made a tape for you and it's in my purse."

"You made a tape?" Jane asked.

"You're not the only one who makes good mix tapes," Maura responded. After a quick kiss, Maura was on her way to the living room.

As she was searching through her purse, she heard the door open and Tommy Rizzoli enter Jane's house. "Ma, some hot girl broke into our house!" he turned around and shouted.

"Thomas, what are you—" Angela began to say until she saw Maura.

Maura was stopped dead in her tracks. She wanted to hide. She wanted to run back to the room and warn Jane. She wanted to do _anything_ other than stand there in nothing but her jeans and her bra in front of her girlfriend's mom and brothers.

"I'm Maura. Jane's girlfriend," she said nervously.

"Now, why is a hot girl like her with Jane?" Tommy said jokingly.

"Tommy, Frankie, go to your room," she ordered.

When Maura hadn't returned, Jane decided to check on her. The loud music had prevented her from hearing what had happened and the moment she set foot in the living room, she was grateful she had decided to keep her underwear on.

"Jane Clementine Rizzoli," Angela said angrily.

For once, Jane was speechless. She stood there, eyes wide, trying to think of a way to explain this. _I don't think she'll buy the 'we were just studying' line_.


	15. Jane's First Broken Heart

Jane stood motionless for what felt like an eternity. Both her mother and her girlfriend were staring at her, waiting for her to say something or, at the very least, blink, but Jane was too fearful to do either of the two.

"Jane Clementine Rizzoli," Angela repeated.

_Play it cool, Jane. _"Ma, you're home," Jane said with an exaggerated tone of excitement in her voice.

"We leave you alone for two hours and this is what happens?" Angela asked.

Jane shrugged. "I thought you'd be home later," she said jokingly, but Angela was far from amused.

"Three minutes, Jane," Angela began. "That's how much time I'm giving the two of you to get dressed and meet me in the kitchen. Have I made myself clear?"

"Crystal," Jane smiled. "C'mon, babe—I mean, Maura."

Jane wanted to grab Maura's hand on the way to her room, but she had a feeling that would do nothing to help their situation. Her mom was fine with her having a girlfriend and the two of them being affectionate with each other, but it was the lying that she wasn't going to tolerate. Jane knew what she had done was wrong and she hoped there was a way to explain herself, but she doubted it and, to make matters worse, she had gotten Maura into an awkward situation. Jane knew her girlfriend was a charming girl and she wanted her mom to get along with her but after what had happened, Jane wondered if her mom would ever see Maura in a positive light.

"You're smiling," Maura pointed out when they were alone in Jane's room.

"I'm smiling because it's the only thing preventing me from screaming," Jane told her. She pulled Maura close and wrapped her arms around her. Jane had expected for Maura to be nervous and maybe even afraid, but what Jane hadn't expected was for her girlfriend to start crying into her shoulder. "Maur, don't cry. It's going to be okay," Jane tried to reassure her, but she wasn't exactly _certain _if everything was going to be okay.

"This isn't how I imagined meeting your mother," Maura told her.

"This isn't how I imagined it either," Jane admitted. "But this is what happened, so now we have to go in there and talk to her like adults. We're adults, Maura. You and I are eighteen-years-old and we're in a committed relationship and we have every right to make love to each other because we're in love and we're in a committed relationship and we're adults and—"

"Jane," Maura interrupted. "You're rambling…and you're repeating yourself. Please don't do that in front of your mother. That counteracts your entire argument about us being adults."

"You're right," Jane agreed. "I'm going to go out there and say, 'Ma, Maura and I are in love with each other and, although I'm sorry I lied to you, I'm not sorry about what we were going to do. Maura and I are in a loving, committed relationship and this is how we express our love for each other.'"

"Sex isn't a new concept for your mother," Maura pointed out. "She's given birth to three children. You need a new approach."

"What approach?" Jane asked. "Regardless of what I say, my mom and I aren't going to be on the same page. She probably thinks of us as horny teenage girls who focus only on sex."

"We don't _only_ focus on sex," Maura began. "But we focus on sex quite a bit."

"No, we don't," Jane argued.

"Yes, we do," Maura insisted. "We have sex every time we see each other. We have sex in my dorm, in the backseat of my car, in the shower—countless other places. Your mother has every right to think of us as horny teenage girls."

"I know," Jane groaned. "Help me pick out something to wear. Maybe I can at least _look _like a responsible adult."

"I've seen your wardrobe and I can't distinguish what's yours and what's Mark's," Maura pointed out. "I love the way your clothes look on you, but responsible adults don't wear oversized flannels over t-shirts of their favorite bands and cartoons. You have a _Beavis and Butt-Head _t-shirt, babe."

"Beavis and Butt-Head are the voice of our generation," Jane argued.

The two of them were startled when Angela knocked on the door. "Thirty seconds," she warned them.

A lack of time partnered with a lack of adult clothing options forced Jane to put on the same pair of sweatpants and the same t-shirt she was wearing earlier. Her girlfriend was leaning against the wall with a blank expression on her face and Jane wished there was something she could do to cheer her up. "Maur, I love you and we're going to be okay."

Maura bit her lip. "I know."

Frank and Angela were already seated at the kitchen table when Jane and Maura arrived. Jane held on to Maura's hand under the table as she waited for their discussion to begin. The way they were seated—with Jane and Maura facing Frank and Angela across the table—made Jane feel as if they were in for an interrogation instead of a discussion between four adults and she squeezed Maura's hand to reassure her that everything was going to be okay.

"This isn't like you, Janie," her father began. "Your mother and I are very disappointed in you."

"We think it'd be best if you two take a break from each other," Angela told them.

"What?" Jane asked angrily. "I'm not going to take a break from Maura because of what happened tonight. I'm sorry if what we did was disrespectful, but I was hoping we could discuss this as adults instead of you treating me like a child in front of my girlfriend. I'm eighteen now—past the age of you being able to put a chastity belt on me or having any control over my sex life."

"You have a sex life?" Angela asked in disbelief.

"Jane," Maura warned her.

"You didn't just prevent me from losing my virginity if that's what you think," Jane informed her. "Maura took that from me weeks ago. What did you think we were doing every time I spent the night with her?"

Angela's eyes darted over to a now blushing Maura. Maura knew they were already falling for each other before the first time they made love, but there was no way she could explain that to Angela. All Angela saw when she looked at Maura was some harlot who de-flowered her little girl.

"It was my first time, also," Maura said in her defense.

"This is when I leave," Frank told Angela. "I'll be in the garage."

Jane, Maura, and Angela sat in silence as Frank got up and left. Angela had wanted him to stay there with her, but she knew this conversation made him even more uncomfortable than it was making her feel. As much as they both saw Jane as their little girl, Jane had always been closer to her father and it was hard for him to realize his daughter was now a young woman and not that little tomboy he'd take fishing every summer. He now knew nothing of her world or who was in it. Jane used to go to him with her problems—problems such as how to get back at the older boys who bullied Tommy and Frankie in elementary school and how to shoot free throws, but Jane's mind was focused on other things now, primarily her girlfriend, and Frank wasn't sure how he should react to the changes going on within his daughter. He no longer knew how to talk to her without upsetting her or boring her and whenever he'd make an attempt, it wouldn't be long before Jane would say something along the lines of, 'Can we talk later? I want to go see Maura.'

Jane glared at her mom. "You're not breaking us up. Maura and I will get married if that's what it takes for you to finally treat us like adults."

"Married?" Angela snickered. "You can't even keep your room clean. How are you going to get married? And where are you two going to live?"

"There's a lovely apartment building next to—" Maura began to say until she realized she wasn't helping the situation. "I should leave before it starts raining again."

"You should," Angela insisted.

"Jane, would you like to stay at my dorm tonight?" Maura asked.

"Unless it's for work or school, Janie isn't leaving the house," Angela told her.

"Mrs. Rizzoli," Maura said as politely as she could. "I'm sorry we didn't meet under more favorable circumstances. I love Jane and, as her girlfriend, I'm going to respect your decision."

Jane was surprised when her mom gave her permission to walk Maura to her car. Angela was expecting for them to say a quick goodbye, but Jane and Maura wanted to prolong each moment. Without caring who might be watching them, Jane pressed Maura's body to hers until there wasn't an inch of space in between them. The chilly late-October air was making Jane shiver, but at that moment she didn't care. She wanted to hold Maura for as long as she could.

"I love you," she told Maura. "And we aren't breaking up. We're just taking a break until everything calms down."

"I could see you at work," Maura began. "And you can still sneak over to my dorm. And there's also—"

"No," Jane interrupted her. "Maura, when I said I'd marry you, I meant it. I know I overreacted in there, but I honestly meant that. I want you and me to marry each other someday, but I also want my parents to respect you for the sweet, honest, and classy woman that you are. Sneaking around is a quick fix, but it isn't going to help us in the long run. You're not the type of woman to sneak around, Maura. You're so much better than that—we both are. I don't know how long we'll be apart, but this will prove to them that our relationship and our love for each other could withstand anything. This isn't puppy love like they think it is. Someday, when you're Dr. Isles and I'm Detective Rizzoli and we're holding each other in our bed, we're going to be glad we did the right thing and proved ourselves."

Maura smiled at her girlfriend. "Why are you being rational when it doesn't benefit me?"

"Because I'm thinking of us," Jane responded. "I love you so much."

"I love you, too," Maura told her. "Since you brought up the subject of marriage, there is something I want to ask you."

"Are you proposing?" Jane teased.

"No," Maura insisted. "But now you're making me question why I even want to go through with this. Do I really want to put up with your abuse on a daily basis?"

Jane playfully lifted her up. "Ask me. I won't let your feet touch the ground until you ask me."

"Fine," Maura laughed. "The girls and I are getting an apartment next school year and we want you to move in with us."

Jane went against her word and started spinning around with Maura still not being able to touch the ground. "Yes, I'll move in with you!"

Maura maneuvered her legs so they were wrapped around Jane's waist. "You will?" she asked in disbelief.

"Yes!" Jane insisted. "Holding you every night before we fall asleep? How am I going to say no to that?"

Maura squealed with delight as Jane set her down on the hood of her car. "And we'll make love to each other every night," Maura told her.

"And every morning," Jane added. "Quickies in the afternoon, too."

"And you said we don't focus on sex," Maura brought to her attention.

"I said we don't focus _entirely _on sex," Jane corrected her. "We wouldn't have this problem if you weren't so hot and you didn't say things that turn me on like the time you told me sex is good for my immune system." Jane gasped. "What if I start getting sick now that we won't be seeing each other? Maura, I literally need you to live."

"I'm not going to miss your sarcasm," Maura said jokingly. "And I'm starting to wonder if I'll be able to live with you."

Although they had just teased each other, Jane was starting to notice an almost predatory look in her girlfriend's eyes. Maura grabbed Jane by her t-shirt collar and pulled her on top of her. To keep her balance, Jane placed the palms of her hands flat on the hood of Maura's car as she pressed her lips against Maura's. Maura's lips were slightly parted, allowing Jane just enough room to forcefully slide her tongue into Maura's mouth. Just as Jane was hoping she would, Maura grabbed a handful of Jane's hair and started to gently pull.

"Girls!" Angela shouted from the porch. "You're acting like a couple of dogs in heat. Don't make me turn the hose on you!"

Jane gave her girlfriend one last kiss. "I should let you go."

"Will you call me?" Maura asked.

"All the time," Jane responded. "And I'll think about you every second of the day." Without caring what the consequences would be, Jane leaned in to kiss Maura again. It was going to be their last kiss for a while and she was already grounded, so she figured she might as well make it count.

"Girls!" Angela shouted again.

"I love you," Jane whispered into Maura's ear.

"I love you, too," Maura responded.

After watching Maura pull out of her driveway, Jane stormed past her mom and into her bedroom. She hadn't lost Maura and she knew she never would, but instead of feeling any excitement about moving in together next year, Jane felt as if her heart was breaking for the first time.


	16. A Form Of Nostalgia

A month had passed since the last time Jane and Maura had seen each other, a month without making love, going on dates, or even hearing each other's voices. Jane had been stripped of her phone privileges for lying, so the two of them resorted to writing letters to each other that Mark would exchange for them. Sometimes, the two of them would enclose pictures and the letters were almost always scented. The scented, handwritten letters were all they had of each other, so they made sure to write straight from the heart. Jane and Maura felt as if they were in a forbidden romance and it would have been exciting had it not been so heartbreaking for the two of them.

Not for a second did Jane ever doubt Maura's fidelity to her, which is one of the many reasons why she felt so guilty about the two of them being forbidden to see each other. Her girlfriend was a beautiful young woman who was sought after by men and women alike. Maura could have her pick of many possible suitors, yet she remained faithful to her girlfriend whom she couldn't spend time with or even speak to on the phone. Jane felt as if she were imprisoning Maura and preventing her from having fun, but she'd never mention that to her. If she did, Jane feared that Maura would think she were doubting her love for her and doubting Maura's love was something Jane could never fathom herself doing. _Maura has nothing to prove to me. I know how much she loves me, but does she know how much I love her?_

The thought of Maura being unaware of the full extent of her love was enough to make Jane want to cry and she would have cried had she not been at work. She may have been without her girlfriend, but Jane still had to go about the mundane activities of her day-to-day life. There were still customers to ring up, classes to attend, and homework assignments to complete. She had celebrated Halloween and Thanksgiving without Maura and, if this continued, she realized she'd be spending Christmas and New Year's Eve without her, too. _Don't freak out about Christmas. She was going to spend it with her parents and not you. Same with New Year's. She's probably going to be somewhere with them, too. Or maybe she'll be alone on New Year's. She can't be alone that night. We need to have our first New Year's Eve kiss._

Jane's thoughts were interrupted when a teenage girl approached the cash register with a Boyz II Men cassette in hand. Jane never particularly cared for Boyz II Men, but their song "I'll Make Love To You" was one of the tracks Maura had put on the mix tape she had given to her the last time they saw each other. Over the past month, that tape never left Jane's stereo, not just because Maura had made it for her, but because Maura had spent hours selecting certain tracks that described everything she was feeling for Jane. Jane liked to think of that tape as being more intimate than a diary and almost like a confession. They were the words Maura dared not speak, herself, and when Jane realized that, she made yet another tape for Maura in return.

Exchanging mix tapes became a more intimate form of communication for them when they felt as if letters just weren't enough. There was never a theme to the tapes because they felt as if themes confined them. Jane and Maura merely chose songs that described their feelings for each other or songs that described their situation. Sometimes the songs were sensual, other times they were playful or even heartbreaking. They'd select songs from their own generation, but mostly they'd choose songs from generations past because these songs gave them hope for their future. If other couples could survive heartache, so could they. They thought about what life must have been like for the couples who slow-danced to these songs or dedicated these songs to each other when they were new. Maura was used to facts, but for Jane she was willing to partake in a game she had created. They'd imagine themselves in different scenarios with the songs and, as immature as it sounded to their friends, it became a coping mechanism for Jane and Maura. In the stories they created with the songs, there were no broken hearts, no restrictions, and they'd go on adventures together and experience things with each other that they couldn't experience outside of these fantasies.

Jane watched the hands on the clock move achingly slow as she waited for four o'clock to approach, which is when Mark's shift began. Mark had spent the entire afternoon in Maura's dorm and, although he was there to see Markie, Jane was jealous of him for having the privilege of spending time under the same roof as her girl. If not for these restrictions, Maura would have visited The Basement and brought her something to eat for lunch or for dinner just as she did almost every day Jane worked. The lunches were never anything more than peanut butter and fluff sandwiches or cookies, but Jane knew bringing something to eat was just an excuse for the two of them to see each other.

"I have something for you, man," Mark said as he entered The Basement.

"From Maura?" Jane asked, hopefully.

"No, man, from Santa Claus," he responded. Jane watched as he searched his pockets and pulled out a cassette with a piece of paper folded around it.

Under normal circumstances, she would have made a sarcastic comment, but Mark had been serving as the only liaison between her and Maura, so she decided to keep the comments to herself. Without so much as a word exchanged between them, Jane grabbed the cassette and popped it into the boom box behind the counter.

"Not this mix tape shit," Mark groaned. "Damn it, Jane. You turn off Alice In Chains for this?"

"It's from Maura," Jane pleaded with him, although it didn't matter what Mark thought. Jane had received a tape from her girlfriend and it was staying on, regardless.

_December 2, 1994_

_My dear Janefriend,_

_It's been thirty-four days since we've last seen each other and thirty-three days since I've last heard your voice. I'm grateful we can communicate via letters and mix tapes, but no amount of songs or printed words can compare to the feeling I get when you hold me._

_The semester ends in one week and I'll be leaving Boston shortly after for the holidays. I sincerely hope this can be resolved by then. I won't return until early January and I don't want to spend another month without any form of communication with my girlfriend. Over the past thirty-four days we've had Mark to deliver our letters, but while I'm gone we'll be cut off from each other entirely. _

_I think about you every second of every day. Please tell me this will all be over soon._

_Forever your devoted girlfriend,_

_Maura_

_P.S. I know we don't use themes, but I've decided to go with a Christmas theme for this mix tape. _

Jane tucked the letter behind the second piece of paper, which contained the scenario Maura had written for the song that was currently playing.

"_I'll Be Home For Christmas"—Bing Crosby_

_It's December of 1942 and I've been serving as a nurse overseas for the past six months. I am only twenty-years-old and I've already witnessed so much of the travesty of war, but I won't feel sorry for myself. There are soldiers I'm tending to who are even younger than I am! I see wounded soldiers on a daily basis. Many of their names escape me, but I can never forget their faces. Some recover and return to the battlefield while others return home with their injuries. The majority of them are young men around our age or slightly older, some are married and have young children while others are single. The young, single men are the ones I have to watch out for. They flirt with me constantly, Jane! It's harmless and not once have I been swayed by any of their words. What they don't know is I have a sweetheart in Boston who is a real-life Rosie The Riveter. At night, while the other women are fantasizing about their husbands or boyfriends or even Clark Gable, I'm fantasizing about you operating a drill and the combination of dirt and sweat on your skin. It has been six months since I've seen you, but I still remember what it feels like to kiss your lips and make love to you._

_There are Christmas songs playing on the radio and I can't bring myself to stop paying attention to them. This is our first Christmas as a couple and it's a tragedy that we must be apart. I love you, Jane, and we'll always be together, even if it's only in our dreams._

Jane held the pages up to her nose and lightly inhaled the familiar floral scent of Ralph Lauren Romance. That scent enabled her to return to a time when her life was less complicated and revolved around seeing Maura on a regular basis or even the hours after their night at Stuevie's when all Jane would fantasize about was what it must feel like to kiss Maura.

"This is all your fault," she told Mark out of nowhere.

"For telling her to go over that night?"

"That and for making me go to Stuevie's three months ago," Jane pointed out. "I was fine before I met her and now that I know she exists and I know what it's like to be with her, I can't function without her."

Mark gave her a confused look. "You want me to apologize for setting you up with some beautiful girl who ended up falling so crazy fucking in love with you? She's your soul mate, Jane. Face it."

"I miss the days when you and I used to hang out on the bridge."

"Like common trolls?" Mark added.

"Yeah," Jane smiled. "Life was easy and nothing hurt. She's still my girlfriend, Mark, and she's faithful to me, so why does it hurt so much?"

"You need her," Mark pointed out. "There's nothing wrong with that, but what you need to do is grow some balls, Jane. I know they're your parents but Maura is your girl. She's in bad shape, man. It's like she's not even Maura anymore. She's just like this empty shell of a woman who goes through the motions of her daily routine and then fucking cries into her pillow at night. Do you really want Maura to keep going through that?"

"I'm eighteen," Jane told him. "I'm an adult and they need to start treating me like one. Okay, so I was going to have sex with my girlfriend at home—so what? It's not something I deserve to be punished for week after week and it's not something Maura deserves to be punished for."

"You know what you should do, man? Like, what you should tell your parents?"

"What?" Jane asked, although she immediately knew she wasn't going to heed his advice when it came to what to tell her parents.

Mark hopped over the counter so he could be next to Jane. "You should have a talk with them in the living room and just be like, 'I'm eighteen now, Mom and Dad. I'm legally of age to buy cigarettes and porn and go to strip clubs.' If that doesn't work, blame the media. Say, 'Mom and Dad, sex is everywhere—TV, movies, music, all over the fucking place. Even Nike is telling me to 'just do it.' They can't argue with that, man."

"You know why they can't argue with it?" Jane asked angrily. "Because it makes no sense, Mark."

"But they'll be so wrapped up in trying to figure out what the fuck you're talking about that it won't matter," Mark pointed out.

Jane lightly banged her head on the glass countertop in hopes that it would help her forget what Mark had just said. "Mark, I hate you. I hate you so much."

"Jane!" Jerry shouted as he walked onto the sales floor. "If your head breaks the glass, it's coming out of your paycheck."

"Okay," Jane said as she laid her head against the glass.

"Jane?"

"Yes?" Jane mumbled while her face was still pressed against the glass countertop.

"We're going to have a talk," Jerry insisted. "Mark, go make yourself useful."

"How?" Mark asked.

"Go alphabetize something," Jerry suggested. "I don't care. Just get out of here."

"Yes, sir," Mark said before saluting him.

_And this is when I get fired._

"You're not getting fired," Jerry insisted. "I know that's what you're worried about. We're gonna talk about Maura. From what I've heard you and Mark talk about and by the way you're acting, things aren't going so great with her."

"They aren't," Jane mumbled.

"I like Maura," Jerry admitted. "Maura is a good kid and I can tell she loves you. Why else would she drive all the way from her school just to bring you a sandwich?"

"She does love me," Jane smiled. "I love her, too."

"I know you do," Jerry told her. "And she's good for you. You've grown up a lot since you've started dating her. I know how you kids are with stories about the past, but I'm going to tell you one and you can do what you wish with it."

"Anything is better than Mark's porn, strip club, and Nike talk," Jane insisted.

"Yeah, but consider the source," Jerry pointed out. "Mark is…he's…Mark. But I want to tell you that you and Maura remind me of Carol and myself when we were your age. We were young, in love, and our parents thought we'd never make it but here we are twenty-seven years later still married and still crazy about each other. We were going to get married right out of high school, but instead, our parents kept us apart so, one night, I snuck over to her house and we ran away together and got married."

"Are you saying I should run away with Maura?" Jane asked.

"I'm not saying anything," Jerry shrugged. "All I told you was to do what you wish with this story."

Jane started to fidget. "Is it possible to do something like that still? It's not the '60s anymore."

"It doesn't matter if it's 1994 or 1967," Jerry pointed out. "Music, clothes, and hairstyles change, but young love remains the same."

He was right. Jane knew he was right. Jane and Maura loved each other and there was no doubt in Jane's mind that they deserved to be together. Jane no longer cared about the restrictions. Her Maura was crying for her every night and she was going to make sure she'd never have to shed another tear.


	17. Maura's Anatomically Correct Jane Doll

The more Jane thought about her conversation with Jerry, the more his words made sense to her. Jane was eighteen-years-old, by definition she was an adult, and it was time for her to make an adult decision. She could either abide by her parents' restrictions or she could console her girl and let her know she'd be there for her for better or for worse. _For better or for worse_—those words replayed on a continuous loop in Jane's mind until the end of her shift.

Immediately after clocking out, Jane picked up the phone at the store and called home.

"Ma, it's Janie." Jane knew she had outgrown that nickname years ago, but she hoped using it would make her mom go easy on her.

"Do you need a ride home?" Angela asked. "Your father can go pick you up. I don't want you riding your skateboard home in the cold."

"I'm staying later," Jane told her. "Jerry needs help with inventory, so I'll be here until eleven. Mark is giving me a ride home."

As was customary for mothers of teenagers to say, Angela told Jane to be careful. After promising she would and silently warning Mark against laughing, Jane hung up the phone. She had lied to her mother and she felt horrible about it, but after what she had gone through over the past month Jane felt it was necessary to lie if it meant being able to see Maura.

Mark shook his head. "Man, you're fucked."

"Mark," Jane pleaded. "I need to see her. There's no need for her to be crying when her girlfriend loves her and is willing to do anything for her."

"Okay, we'll go," Mark finally gave in. "I'm off in an hour and we'll go straight to BCU from here."

"Thanks," Jane said as she gave him a hug. "I'll meet you back here. I have to go pick up something for Maura."

"Just go down on her," Mark suggested.

"Mark," Jane groaned.

"What?" Mark shrugged. "It's pleasurable and free."

Jane decided to ignore his last comment. "I'll be back in an hour."

There was a jewelry store a couple of blocks away from The Basement, so Jane grabbed her skateboard and left without telling Mark where she was going. The chilly December air was slightly stinging her face as she rode past pedestrians on her skateboard. The faster she rode, the stronger the air hit her, but Jane was determined to get to the jewelry store before they closed.

A month ago, she had designed a promise ring for Maura. It was nothing fancy, but it was the first piece of jewelry Jane had purchased for Maura and she took pride in the fact that she purchased it on her own with money she had saved specifically for this ring. There were no diamonds, but the ring had both of their birthstones and their names engraved next to their respective birthstones. The moment the sales associate had finished designing it with her, Jane knew the ring was one-of-a-kind just like Maura.

Her original plan was to give Maura the ring closer to her winter break, but Jane could no longer wait. The ring was ready for her to pick up and, the more she thought about Jerry's words of wisdom, the more she leaned toward using it as an engagement ring instead.

Jane walked into the jewelry store, her nose red from the cold weather and her hands shaking. She would have liked to blame her shaky hands on the cold weather as well, but she knew it was her nerves. Eighteen-year-old Jane Rizzoli was about to purchase an engagement ring for her girl. She had hoped this day would come eventually, but never could she imagine it'd be happening so soon. _You're ready, Jane. You love Maura and Maura loves you. She's going to say yes. She's going to be thrilled you—_

"Can I help you, miss?" a sales associate asked as she gave Jane a strange look. Jane was out of place in comparison to the rest of their clientele. Her ripped jeans and the skateboard tucked underneath her arm clashed with the suits and dresses everyone else was wearing.

"I'm here to pick up a ring," Jane said as politely as she could. "It's under the name Jane Rizzoli."

The lady smiled as she looked at the names engraved on the ring. "Are you giving your girlfriend a promise ring for Christmas?"

"I'm proposing," Jane bragged.

"But, sweetheart you're so young." Jane felt as if she was being patronized and she wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible. 'You're so young.' She knew she was going to be hearing those words for years to come, but she was already growing tired and frustrated with them. Yes, she was young and she was aware of that, but she knew her age didn't play a factor in how much she loved Maura.

After purchasing the ring, Jane hurried back to the music store where Mark was waiting inside his car. She clutched the ring box tightly in her hand and waited for Mark's comments to begin. He wasn't exactly against her getting married in the future, but Jane was his best friend and he was against her making a mistake.

"Jane," he said as they were in the parking lot near the BCU dorms.

"What?" Jane asked nervously, her hands still clutching the ring box.

"Do you remember the first time we heard 'Jeremy'?" he asked. "We were in the parking lot outside that abandoned building that we'd go to when we wanted to get away."

"Yeah, what about it?" Jane responded.

"We sat there, man," Mark pointed out. "I had just gotten my license and my car and we could have been anywhere in this city, but instead we were parked near that building, listening to this song in the backseat of my car. We just sat there, Jane, and we didn't say a word. And then we held each other's hands, not because there was any chemistry between us, but because it was the thing to do and we needed that reassurance that the other was there and we needed human contact. Then you said the most profound thing I ever heard about life and love and the shit people do to each other and all I could think was, 'this girl. This fucking girl.' And then we let go of each other's hands because we realized holding hands with each other was fucking gross. After that we talked about chicks and you said you were going to save yourself for the right girl and I made fun of you for it. When you said you were saving yourself for the right girl, I imagined you being a virgin 'til you were like thirty, man, because there's no such thing as finding the right girl before then. But shit changes. Shit fucking changes. And here you are with that ring in your hand and you're going to propose to Maura. I don't want to say it's a mistake, but what the hell are you doing?"

"I love her," Jane said defensively. "And I want to be with her."

"Loving her means losing Jane," Mark pointed out. "It's like you two were in some nuclear holocaust and you fused into a monster called the Janeandmaura or Jamaura for short or even Jaura or Janera. It's hard to tell where you end and she begins. This isn't right, Jane. Don't throw your life away at eighteen."

"I'm not throwing my life away," Jane insisted. "I love Maura and I know getting married isn't what you want right now, but I'm not you."

"And thank god for that," Mark told her. "Jane, you're smart. You've always been smart, but right now you're being so stupid. How are you and Maura going to support yourselves? You're going to have to give up everything for her. What if your parents disown you, man? What if hers disown her? You've never even met her parents or spoken to them. They don't even know she has a girlfriend, Jane. Nothing about this is a good idea. Think about it. I know it sounds romantic, but you can't live on love."

Jane held his hands between hers. "I've thought about it and there's nothing I want more than to marry her. It's not going to be easy for us, but I'd rather us struggle together than live comfortably without each other. Your girl isn't crying right now, but mine is, and I don't want her to go through that anymore. I'll do anything I can to take care of her. No one is on our side right now, so I was hoping at least my best friend would support me in this."

"You love her that much?" Mark asked.

"Yes!" Jane insisted.

"Fine," Mark groaned. "But don't say I didn't warn you. Oh, and Jane, man, I just thought of something."

"What?" Jane asked.

"Maybe this marriage thing isn't a bad idea," he realized. "When you and Maura get married, you can have sex with her whenever you want and no one can say a damn thing."

"And…welcome back," Jane said jokingly. "I was waiting for that comment."

"Ready?" Mark asked.

"As I'll ever be," Jane responded nervously. She took the ring out of the ring box and tucked it securely in her pocket.

When they approached the eighth floor, Jane hesitated to walk down the hall to Maura's room. These were her final moments before proposing to Maura and so many thoughts were running through her head. She thought about what Maura's reaction would be and when she'd want to get married. Jane hoped it was soon because she could hardly go another day without Maura being her wife. She imagined the two of them in their first apartment and learning how to run their new household together. She pictured what it must be like to come home to Maura after a long day of school and work. Her girlfriend—no, her _wife_—would be waiting for her and they'd spend the rest of the night cuddling and making love to each other. Maybe they'd have children someday or maybe they wouldn't. Jane wasn't sure, but what she was sure of is that they'd grow old together and Maura would be the woman she'd spend the rest of her life with. With that in mind, Jane knew she was ready.

"Mark!" Markie said excitedly when she answered the door and saw him standing there. She pulled him in for a kiss, but once she saw Maura looking at her with sore, puffy eyes, she let go of him.

"Did you bring something from Jane?" Maura asked hopefully.

"I didn't bring anything from Jane," he said. "But I have a surprise for you." Surprise or not, the only words that Maura focused on was when he said it wasn't from Jane. "Yo!" he shouted down the hall.

"That's not the code word," Maura heard Jane say as she approached the door.

"Jane!" Maura called out. "Mark, you better not be playing a joke on me."

But she was there. After thirty-four days of not seeing her, Jane was standing in her doorway. As planned, Mark pulled out an adhesive red bow from the pocket of his sweatshirt and stuck it on Jane's head. "I didn't know what to get you," he told Maura. "So I decided to get you this anatomically correct, lifelike Jane Rizzoli sex doll. She's almost like the real thing. You have no idea how much I spent on her."

Markie let out a giggle, but Jane and Maura were no longer paying attention to him. Her girlfriend was finally with her and all Maura wanted was to be wrapped in her arms. Maura had been crying earlier, but the moment she saw Jane she began to cry again.

"It's okay, babe," Jane said as she stroked her back. "No more crying. Your Jane is here."

"I can't do this," Maura sobbed. "All I want is you, Jane. I can't be without you."

Jane pulled back to wipe her tears away. Seeing Maura cry was breaking her heart and she could only imagine what it must have been like for her every night they were apart. "You won't have to anymore," she promised.

Jane fidgeted with the ring in her pocket, just waiting for the perfect moment to propose to Maura. She had no elaborate proposal planned or even a speech, but her words were going to come straight from the heart. Her girl was holding on to her for dear life and all Jane wanted was to reassure her that they'd never be apart again. She loved Maura and, at eighteen, she already knew she had found the right girl. In a few moments, they would be taking the first step toward growing up and growing old together.

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**A/N: I know same-sex marriage wasn't legal in 1994, but in the land of fanfic anything is possible. Oh, and thank you to zerodarkwolf for the red ribbon suggestion. :)**


	18. A Ring And A Substitute For Mistletoe

**A/N: Thank you so much for all of the love. Your kind words inspired me to update this...yet again. :)**

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Maura held on to her girlfriend tighter than she ever had, not just because it had been so long since the last time she had held her, but because she feared what would happen if she let go. Jane was there, in the flesh, but she couldn't help feeling as if she had dreamed Jane into life and she'd be gone the moment she let go of her. Her broken heart had begun to cloud her judgment. In the thirty-four days she went without Jane, there were no longer any facts, just wishes and daydreams of when she'd be reunited with her.

They had yet to kiss and the anticipation was taking a toll on Maura. She longed for the softness of Jane's lips and the taste of her spearmint chapstick. Maura would never have admitted it to her friends, but she had purchased a tube of the same chapstick Jane used for the sole purpose of having that same flavor and softness on her own lips. Throughout the day, Maura would subtly lick her lips while wearing the chapstick, but the memories that spearmint flavor would evoke only made her miss Jane even more. Maura realized it wasn't just the chapstick she craved, it was the way the spearmint would mix so perfectly with her own strawberry lip gloss whenever they kissed. It was a combination Maura tried to duplicate, but she could never get it right and the more she tried the more frustrated she became.

Mark and Markie had left the room, but Maura was too wrapped up in Jane to notice. After countless tears and wishes made on her wishing star, her Jane was finally there with her.

"You're here," Maura whispered.

"I am, but I'm not," Jane said jokingly. "I'm really just an anatomically correct Jane doll like Mark explained."

Jane removed the adhesive bow that was stuck to her hair and held it high above their heads. The sight of her girlfriend smiling at her with her arm extended in the air made Maura smile in return. "What are you doing?" she asked.

"Making a cheap substitute for mistletoe," Jane informed her. "And I'm waiting for you to kiss me."

Without a warning, Maura pounced on Jane and knocked the two of them back onto her bed. Maura had fantasized about how their first kiss would be after reuniting—it would be delicate, maybe even chaste, but the reality of their first kiss was far from what she had fantasized. As she straddled Jane, Maura pressed her lips to hers. She felt the familiar softness of Jane's lips, the lips she knew she wanted to kiss for the rest of her life.

How much they missed each other and how much they loved each other went without being said in that moment as they gave in to the more physical aspect of their relationship. Jane may have been on borrowed time and she had yet to propose, but there was no way she was going to refuse Maura's need and even her own desire for them to kiss each other. Over half an hour had passed before either Jane or Maura were aware that any time had passed at all.

"I have to leave soon," Jane pointed out.

The thought of Jane leaving her again hit Maura harder than Jane had expected. The tears pooled at the corners of Maura's eyes until a solitary drop landed on Jane's cheek.

"You're leaving me again?" Maura asked. "When are you going to talk to your parents, Jane? When are you going to tell them that we love each other and we deserve to be together?"

Jane pulled Maura onto her so she could wrap her arms securely around Maura. "There's no point," Jane said glumly.

"Yes, there is," Maura argued.

"Not when nobody is listening," Jane responded. "They don't take us seriously. This is puppy love to them and they think the longer I'm without you the less I'll love you, but this separation has had the opposite effect on me. It's made me love you more than ever before."

"I've had the same realization," Maura admitted. "What do they have against us?"

Jane placed a delicate kiss on her forehead. "Nothing. They were upset with what we did and they think we spend too much time together, like our lives revolve around each other."

"When is this going to end?" Maura asked.

"Soon," Jane promised. "I want you to wait right here."

When Maura wouldn't get off of her, Jane had no choice but to tickle her until she moved. Maura tried to pull her back onto the bed, but all Jane would do is give her one more kiss before getting up.

Maura watched as Jane searched through mix tapes she had made. When she found the one she was looking for, she put it in the boom box and pressed play. The song she played had never been one of Maura's favorites, nor had she known it that well, but her opinion about the song changed when Jane had chosen it for one of their song scenarios. While listening to it, Jane had imagined them in the year 1970 and the world was changing around them. There was so much turmoil and so many decisions they had to make regarding their future, but every worry was set aside when they were in the backseat of Maura's car and they gave themselves to each other for the first time.

Maura had never imagined herself getting lost in such fantasies, but she found herself looking forward to every song scenario because they gave her an opportunity to lose herself with Jane. They weren't split up and there was no crying. Instead, Maura was a prom queen in 1963 and a nurse during World War II. Maura had planned on keeping these scenarios in a book so they could reflect on this time apart and look at how far they've come since the separation.

She had been told to remain on the bed, but Maura could no longer wait for physical contact with Jane. She got off the bed and slowly made her way over to Jane as quietly as she could. Maura reached from behind and wrapped her arms around Jane's waist. She was two inches shorter than her girlfriend, but their height difference gave her the perfect opportunity to rest her head on Jane's shoulders.

"I told you to stay on the bed," Jane said playfully. To get back at her girlfriend, Jane quickly turned around and lifted Maura up.

Maura let out the cutest giggle Jane had ever heard. "I tried to stay on the bed, but I already missed you."

Jane carried Maura over to the bed and laid her down as gently as she could, but Maura had something else in mind. She pulled Jane on top of her by the collar of her shirt so she could hold her instead. Maura was rarely _given _the opportunity to hold Jane, so she knew she'd just have to take that chance and hold Jane against her will.

"I feel like I'm holding a squirming six-year-old," Maura told her.

"That means I want out," Jane quipped. "Out. Out."

Maura tightened the hold she had on Jane. "You're staying where you are."

Jane was going to argue until she realized her head was perfectly positioned on Maura's chest. "Fine with me," Jane agreed as she slowly moved her hand up Maura's shirt.

"Why did you choose this song?" Maura asked once they were settled into a comfortable position.

"I chose it because it's about a guy who loves a girl," Jane said nervously.

"They're all about guys who love girls or girls who love guys or girls who love girls," Maura pointed out.

"But this is different," Jane insisted. "I can relate to this guy. He found his girl, the one and only girl for him and all he wants is to make it with her as in make it through life. He doesn't know her well and she doesn't know him well either, but he knows how he feels about her and he can't see himself with any other girl. There's something I want to ask you, Maura."

Maura felt her girlfriend start to tense up. "What do you want to ask me?"

"Do you know how I knew you were the one?"

"No," Maura responded. She knew some of the reasons Jane had listed previously, but there was always a new reason each time.

"I fall in love with you all over again each day," Jane confessed. "Because I learn something new about you each day. There was that time we went to the drive-in to watch _Reality Bites_ and every couple there was making out and so were we until we heard that perfect line that resonated with us. We literally stopped what we were doing and held each other throughout the rest of the movie. It was perfect, Maura. After, we just held each other at the park and talked for hours about our plans for after college and the movie soundtrack and the comparison between Gen X films and Baby Boomer films and how it's okay and even expected for our generation to be cynical. I hung on to your every word and it was four in the morning before we even realized we had been talking for six hours. That was the night I learned why Snot calls you the Queen of the Dead and that Ace of Base is one of your favorite groups, but you were too embarrassed to tell me. The next day I bought an Ace of Base cassette and listened to it repeatedly just because you said you like them. I can think of so many other moments but what I'm really getting at is the fact that we don't know each other that well, but we learn so many things about each other every time we're together. We're eighteen, Maura, and I know we're young but we're going to be okay. We may not know each other that well, but I want to spend the rest of my life learning about you."

Maura smiled at her. "It almost sounds as if you're—" She was interrupted by Jane rolling off of her and digging through her pockets. Jane pulled out the ring and the moment she slipped it on her finger, Maura started crying again. "Jane, what are you doing?"

"Will you marry me?"

Maura looked into Jane's dark eyes. In that moment, there was a certain innocence about her girlfriend and about that moment that neither of them could quite grasp. Before this semester, Maura was alone, but there she was in her dorm receiving a proposal from the girl of her dreams. Maura looked at their names engraved on the ring. _Jane and Maura Rizzoli_, she thought.

"Yes!" Maura responded.

"Yes?" Jane said excitedly. "Really? So, you're marrying me?"

"Yes!" Maura said excitedly.

"Okay, just to be sure. You said you're going to marry me?" Jane asked again.

"Jane, yes!" Maura repeated. "Yes, I'll marry you!"

"Really?"

"Yes! Yes! Yes!"

"Add the words, 'right there, Jane' and it'd sound like we were having sex."

"Jane!" Maura said as she playfully pinched her on the arm.

Maura watched as Jane got up from the bed and opened the window. "Maura Isles is going to marry me!" she shouted for everyone below to hear.

"Fuck yeah!" Stash shouted from the quad down below.

"Jane, get it in!" Roxie added.

_Of all the people to be in the quad_, Jane thought. _It had to be them. _She looked at the clock and realized it was time to leave. She had just gotten engaged to Maura, but because of an unfair restriction, she had absolutely no time to celebrate with her or hold her and discuss plans for the future. "Maur, I have to go."

"I know," Maura sighed. "Jane, let's get married tomorrow."

"Okay," Jane said nonchalantly. "Wait, tomorrow? As in the day after today?"

"That'd be the day," Maura smiled.

It was exactly what Jane had been hoping for and she was glad her girlfriend was on the same page as her. "I love you," she said as she held her close. "And tonight is going to be the last night we'll ever be apart."

Jane and Maura had made plans to get married first thing the next morning. Jane would have to sneak away, but she no longer cared. In less than twelve hours, Maura would forever be her Mrs. Rizzoli.


	19. Jane and Maura Rizzoli

**A/N: Thank you so much for the fic love. It really brightens my days and I'm glad to know that some of you are enjoying this little journey that our girls are on. Now for some more Jane and Maura circa 1994.**

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After a brief celebration with her friends, Maura peacefully drifted off to sleep. Throughout the past month, Maura would stay up as late as she possibly could with them for the sole purpose of avoiding the loneliness of a dark dorm room. While lying in bed, Maura's mind always focused on Jane and how much she missed her, but the night of Jane's proposal was different because Maura knew the faster she fell asleep the faster morning would come and she'd be Mrs. Rizzoli.

Maura's alarm was scheduled to go off at eight the next morning, but she was rudely awaken by her friends before her alarm could give off its obnoxious beeping noise.

"Wakey, wakey," Stash said as she shook Maura. When that didn't work, she forcefully pulled her blankets and sent Maura rolling onto the floor.

The sudden impact shocked Maura, but Stash had successfully completed what she sought out to do: Maura—or Dort as she had been so affectionately nicknamed—was now awake.

"It's your wedding day!" Roxie said excitedly.

When Maura opened her eyes, she noticed that her friends were not only wide-awake, they were also dressed and ready to go to the courthouse.

"Jane's on her way," Markie announced.

"Already?" Maura asked in disbelief.

"There's no time to go to the dining hall, so we got you some juice," Roxie said with a mischievous smile on her face.

When Roxie handed her the already-opened plastic bottle of orange juice, Maura wanted to question their intentions. Instead, she unscrewed the cap and swallowed an entire mouthful. The juice burned her throat and she immediately felt as if she wanted to throw up.

Stash and Roxie exploded into a fit of laughter. "That shit's like three-fourths vodka," Stash announced.

"Why the hell would you give her vodka?" Markie asked angrily.

"Because we couldn't give her a bachelorette party," Roxie said in Stash's defense. "Maura wanted to go to bed so early last night. We didn't even have enough time to get her wasted."

"So you're getting her wasted right before Jane gets here?" Markie asked.

"Chill," Stash told her. "Dort is fine."

"I'll be okay," Maura insisted. "I just can't drink anymore. I need to be ready for Jane."

Roxie looked Maura up and down. "Hurry. You look like shit, Dort, and your breath smells like vodka now. You might make Jane change her mind about marrying you."

"Babe, shut up," Stash said as she covered Roxie's mouth.

Maura knew she should get into the shower, but instead she looked through a plastic crate for a box of granola bars that she had purchased for Jane. The entire crate was filled with Jane's favorite snacks and Maura liked to keep them on hand whenever Jane visited her. "Tell Jane her granola bars are there if I'm not out of the shower by the time she gets here," Maura said to her friends. "And her yogurt is in the fridge."

"Danimals," Stash said as she opened Maura's mini fridge. "Nice."

"She likes to dip granola bars in strawberry yogurt," Maura told her friends. "Especially the yogurt with colorful sprinkles. It's really cute to watch how she—"

"Wait," Roxie interrupted. "You keep a crate filled with Jane's favorite snacks?"

"Yes," Maura answered matter-of-factly. "Is that bad?"

Roxie started giggling. "That's so cute, Dort! It's like you're already being a good wife and making sure she eats."

"She works up an appetite," Maura said shyly.

"You're such a ditz," Markie said to Roxie. "Jane over-exerts herself during sex which causes her to work up an appetite. Maura keeps this little crate of snacks so she could get her energy level back up without having to leave the room. This way Jane could stay naked and be ready to pleasure her again."

"Yeah, I like my version better," Roxie said as she averted her eyes.

"Give her the granola bars when she gets here," Maura reiterated. "She probably hasn't eaten."

Minutes after Maura had gotten into the shower, Jane and Mark pulled into the parking lot outside the dorms. So far, their plan had gone off without a hitch. Jane's parents believed Jane had an early shift at The Basement to finish taking inventory and, because she had been abiding by their rules for over a month, they had agreed to let her spend the night at Mark's house that night. They assumed Jane was going to be safely tucked away in Mark's room playing video games and watching MTV all night. Little did they know, their first-born was a newlywed who was going to be spending that night—and every night—with her wife. Jane and Maura had yet to discuss where they were going to live or how they were going to tell their parents, so they were grateful when Markie said she'd spend the night in Roxie and Stash's room so Jane and Maura could have some time alone on their wedding night to bond as a married couple and talk about their plans for the future.

"You okay?" Mark asked when he noticed how much Jane was starting to shiver.

"Just cold," Jane insisted. "It's twenty fucking degrees outside."

"It's twenty fucking degrees every winter," Mark pointed out. "What's the real reason why you're shivering like that?"

"I don't know," Jane shrugged.

"Jane, man," Mark said as he grabbed her hand. "You're getting married in less than two fucking hours. Now isn't the time to hold anything back."

Jane pulled her hand away and started to wipe away her tears. "This conversation stays between us?"

"Shit yeah," Mark promised.

"I'm scared," Jane admitted to him. "I love Maura so much that it hurts, but there are so many what ifs running through my mind right now. What if I'm not a good provider? We don't even know where we're going to live or what we're going to do. I make three hundred dollars a month, Mark. How the hell am I supposed to support us with that? Maura looks to me and I'm afraid of letting her down. It's just happening so fast. Right now, I feel like I'm Janie and I'm young and at the mercy of my parents. Once I'm married, little Janie will be gone forever and in her place will be Jane—Jane the adult and Jane the provider and Jane who is expected to be mature and responsible. What if I can't do any of that? What if I'm not good enough for Maura?"

"Jane, this is Maura we're talking about," Mark reminded her. "She knows you, man. It may have only been three months since you've met her, but she knows you. She knows you burn Pop-Tarts no matter what setting the toaster is on. She knows you're a mouthy little shit sometimes. She knows you work part-time and make minimum wage at The Basement and she doesn't care. She doesn't fucking care, Jane. Maura loves you. So what if you don't have money and you don't have a plan? Who the fuck does? My parents got married when they were young and so did yours and they're still together. Why can't you and Maura do the same? They didn't have a plan either. They just worked as a team and went with what they knew and what they didn't know they learned along the way. I know I may have sounded like I was against this last night, but I just want you to be happy. You suck and you're boring when you're sad."

Jane smiled for the first time since they had arrived at BCU. "I really do love her."

Mark playfully socked her in the arm. "Then get the fuck out of this car and marry her."

Before entering Maura's dorm, Jane had picked up some warm caramel apple cider for Maura at a café on campus. The weather outside was colder than they had expected and she wanted Maura to have something warm to drink.

"Where's Maura?" Jane asked excitedly when she entered her dorm.

"Showering," Markie said nonchalantly. "But you can't go in there. You aren't supposed to see your bride before the wedding."

"What wedding?" Jane asked. "We're just signing papers. Maura and I didn't want a ceremony."

"Still," Markie insisted. "You can't see her."

"She has granola bars and yogurt for you," Roxie pointed out. "Dort is really cute."

"They're fucking gross," Mark said with a disgusted look on his face. "Both Jane and Maura are. Jane brought her some apple cider and trail mix."

"It's her favorite kind," Jane said defensively. "We went to a grocery store in Cambridge that sells organic foods and they have a section where you can put together your own trail mix. There's a certain mix that she made and she loved it so much that she ate the whole bag for breakfast one morning. When she wasn't looking, I wrote down what was in it so I could make it for her again. I even made sure to add extra cranberries and dried banana chips because she loves them. And she loves apple cider on cold days so I bought her some to go with her trail mix."

"Ugh!" Stash scoffed. "I don't even know what's the point of signing papers. You two are married already."

Jane was starting to become impatient. She knew Maura had to get ready and she knew she'd be spending the rest of her life with her, but she just couldn't wait another second to see Maura. "Where is my beautiful bride?"

Once she heard Jane's voice, Maura emerged from the bathroom in a robe and her hair still dripping wet. She had yet to put on her makeup, but she wasn't the least bit self-conscious about greeting Jane. She knew Jane loved her just the way she was, makeup or no makeup.

"My girl," Jane said softly.

"Your wife," Maura corrected her.

"My Mrs. Rizzoli," Jane added. "I love you so much."

Maura knew everyone was waiting on her so they could head over to the courthouse, but she just couldn't get herself to let go of Jane. The two of them were about to make a lifelong commitment to each other and Maura wanted that extra reassurance that could only come with cuddling up to Jane. Maura's wet hair was starting to dampen Jane's shirt, but Jane hardly noticed. Instead, she held Maura as tight as she could until their friends nearly pried them apart.

"Let's go, let's go," Markie said excitedly. "You two have the rest of your lives to hold each other. We want you to get married already."

Jane and Maura ate their breakfast on the way to the courthouse. Their friends were talking and laughing and singing off-key to every song that played on the radio, but Jane and Maura sat quietly in the backseat after they were finished eating. Maura gently squeezed Jane's hand and the two of them gave each other a quick peck while their friends were too pre-occupied to care about what they were doing.

Jane and Maura had written vows for each other, but they weren't for anyone else to hear. What they had written came straight from their hearts and if nobody else were to hear their vows it would be a secret that just the two of them shared and forever will share as a married couple.

"Are you ready?" Jane asked once they were alone in the backseat of Mark's car.

"Ready to be your wife?" Maura asked. "Yes, but are you ready to be mine?"

"Definitely," Jane smiled.

They had both remembered the vows they had written for each other, but now that they were in the moment, neither Jane nor Maura felt as if pre-written vows weren't appropriate.

Maura took a deep breath as she grabbed Jane's hands. "I love you," she said nervously. "I love you for who you are now and I love you for who you're going to be in the future. You're my kindred spirit, my soul mate, and from this moment I vow to be forever faithful to you both in mind and body. As your wife, I vow to be your partner, your lover, and your confidante now and forever."

"My Maura," Jane said as she looked into her eyes. "From the moment I first saw you, I felt like I was drawn to you and the more time I spent with you the more I realized you were the one for me. You're my perfect half and you complete me in a way that no one else can. Over the past three months, you've been my girlfriend and my best friend and now that we're getting married, I know our relationship will continue to grow stronger. Whenever I look into your eyes, I know I'm looking into the eyes of the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with. We're going to experience so many changes in our lives and it gives me hope and comfort to know that I'll be experiencing them with you by my side. You have all of me, Maura, and I vow to love you and be faithful to you for the rest of our lives."

As far as Jane and Maura were concerned, it was their vows they exchanged in the backseat of Mark's car that bonded them officially as a married couple. Signing their marriage license was merely a formality, but it still brought so much excitement for the young couple to see their names on an official document. Courthouse employees and even people waiting in line for different documents stared at Jane and Maura as they signed their marriage license. They heard people whispering about their age and how they were far too young to get married, but their words didn't phase them. Jane and Maura Rizzoli were young and in love and they knew they were going to make it regardless of what anybody said.


	20. Queen of the Dead

Jane and Maura had wanted time to themselves but their friends insisted on going out to dinner followed by a night out at Stuevie's. Maura knew Stuevie's was Jane's favorite place to hang out and Jane would probably have the time of her life with Mark, but Maura could hardly wait to get her new wife alone. They were newlyweds and, under normal circumstances, they would be on their honeymoon. Maura had imagined the two of them making love to each other for hours on end in her dorm room, but instead she found herself in a dark, smoke-filled venue waiting for Snot's band to perform.

For Jane's sake, Maura had promised to make the most of it while she was there. As she surveyed the area, she noticed that nothing about it had changed over the past three months. The music was just as loud, the crowd was just as rowdy, and Mark and Markie were just as eager to get into the mosh pit. The only differences were Jane and Maura. The two of them had grown up so much since their first night together at Stuevie's. They were no longer making awkward conversation with each while leaning against the wall and wondering just how much they could test their limits with each other. That night, Jane and Maura were two inexperienced girls who had never been kissed and, just three months later, they were two married women with adult decisions to make—but that was going to wait until later. For a few hours they were going to put their worries aside and have fun with their friends before everything changed. In just a few days, Maura's friends would be heading home for winter break. Markie would be in Portland, Roxie would be in Santa Monica, and Stash would be in her small town in Alabama. They would be in all four corners of the country and, although she'd have her wife, Maura worried about being away from the rest of her support system for an entire month.

While they were sitting at a table at Stuevie's, Maura caught herself looking at her new wife, the woman she was going to spend the rest of her life with. Jane was sitting next to Mark and the two of them were laughing hysterically about an inside joke. Although Maura wasn't included in the joke, she couldn't help smiling at her wife. Jane was so beautiful and kind-hearted and funny and so completely Maura's. When Jane noticed Maura was looking at her, she reached under the table and held on to Maura's hand. It was a simple gesture but it meant so much to Maura.

"…and then I wrote '_You don't suck as much as everyone else_. _Love, Jane,'_" Maura heard her wife say. She had missed the entire story and when she heard her friends laughing she wished she had caught it.

"That's the worst story ever," Mark said although he had also been laughing. "I have a better one."

"No," Jane pleaded with him.

"I'd love to hear it," Maura insisted.

Mark turned to Jane. "Your wife wants to hear it." Once Maura had said she wanted to hear it, Jane wasn't about to protest. She playfully punched Mark in the arm and told him to continue. "This was two years ago—"

"Two very long years ago," Jane interrupted.

"Two very long years ago," Mark reiterated. "It was the first day of summer vacation and I was excited to take Jane out—not in some romantic way, but more of a 'fuck tenth grade, we're glad it's over' kind of way. When I was almost out the door, my dad stopped me and tossed one of those small boxes of condoms to me, the three-pack ones. I was like, 'Dad, what's this for?' and he said, 'For when you're alone with Jane.' Then he patted me on the back like he was fucking proud of me, man. I flat out said, 'Dad, it's not like that with me and Jane,' but he wasn't buying it no matter how many times I told him so I just took the condoms and kept them in the glove compartment to use on chicks who _weren't _Jane."

"Other chicks," Jane scoffed. "You were a virgin until a few days before graduation."

"And?" Mark retorted. "You were a virgin until Maura."

"She's my first and my last," Jane said before giving Maura a quick peck on the lips.

"Gross," Mark responded. "As I was saying, I kept them in my glove compartment and when I got home that night, I thought I'd get back at my dad for not listening to me, so I said, 'Dad, tonight I became a man.' Vague fucking statement, right? I wanted to fuck with his head, but instead he tells Mr. and Mrs. Rizzoli."

"And our parents gave us a talk after that," Jane said as she hid her face with her hands.

"It was bad enough that Mr. Rizzoli looked like he wanted to kill me" Mark began. "But then my mom asks Jane about birth control and, keep in mind, Jane is already pissed at me for starting this whole thing, but then I open my fucking mouth and say, 'Ma, Jane's gay. She doesn't need to worry about birth control.'"

"This bastard _outed _me to my parents and his," Jane added.

"It slipped out," Mark insisted. "But it ended that 'Mark and Jane are sleeping together' mess and gave you an interesting coming out story. You should be thanking me, man."

"You should be grateful I didn't kick your ass," Jane pointed out. "I even thought about how I was going to do it."

"Your parents are cool with it?" Stash asked.

"Yeah and they were relieved that I wasn't dating Mark," Jane responded. "Gay or straight, they know I can do better than him."

"Dick," Mark told her before lightly smacking her upside the head. Before Jane could retaliate, Roxie asked the two of them another question.

"How long have you been friends?" she asked.

"Since we were both in our mothers' wombs," Jane informed her. "Our moms have been best friends since elementary school."

"Yeah, Jane and I would communicate with each other before we were even born," Mark added. "We'd plan our escape together. We both wanted to bust out of the womb and we did so like five days apart."

Markie leaned into him. "No offense, babe, but tonight is supposed to be about Jane and Maura not you and Jane. Let's make a toast."

"To Jane and Maura," Stash said as they all clinked their glasses of soda together.

"You're not getting out of it that easily," Mark told Maura. "I have a few words to say in honor of you confining my best friend to the same vagina for the rest of her life."

"No," Jane groaned.

"Yes!" Mark insisted. "Maura, our dear Maura. When I first saw you at The Basement, I wasn't really paying all that much attention to you because I was trying to arrange an opportunity to get into Markie's pants, but you were pretty so I thought I'd pawn you off on my best friend. You seemed easy and Jane needed to get laid, so I figured what the hell. Even though you didn't put out that night and you two didn't even kiss, you were still all Jane talked about. That's when I teased her about falling in love and she pushed me off of my skateboard. And then she ended up falling in love with you and the more time I spent with you the more I realized how perfect you are for her. I've never seen Jane this happy before and I know it's because of you. Jane is like the Butt-Head to my Beavis and when you came along I thought I was losing my Butt-Head, but I was wrong. I'm not losing her. Instead, I'm gaining another Butt-Head and, well, I'll drink to that."

"Thank you," Maura said with a confused look on her face.

"No prob," Mark responded.

"Okay, my turn," Markie announced. "Jane. Jane fucking Rizzoli. My opinion on you has changed so much over the past three months. When I first saw you, I assumed you were an arrogant asshole, but all of that changed when I talked to you. That's when I realized you were a sarcastic asshole, but not an arrogant one, which is better. Maura fell for you so quickly and I worried about you using her, but the more she talked about you and the more time I spent with you made me realize how much you love Maura and you'd never break her heart. With that being said, if you ever break her heart, I will hire someone bigger than you to kick your ass."

"I'll keep that in mind," Jane said nervously.

Roxie rolled her eyes at them. "Wedding toasts are supposed to be sweet."

"Yeah, we don't do that," Mark told her. "If this were fifteen years from now and we had champagne and shit and weeks to prepare, my speech might have been a little more heartfelt, but we're eighteen, chillin' at Stuevie's, and drinking Coke with way too much grenadine in it. You make due with what you have, man."

Another fifteen minutes had passed before Snot's band started to play and Maura noticed how nervous her wife was becoming. Not wanting to bring attention to it in front of their friends, Maura leaned in and kiss Jane on the cheek.

"I love you," she whispered into Jane's ear. Instead of a verbal response, Jane wrapped her arms around Maura and held her tightly. She was able to fully take in her wife's scent—the combination of her shampoo, perfume, and lotion. That scent usually served as a source of comfort but, in that moment, it was like an aphrodisiac for Maura. They had already been married for twelve hours and she had yet to spend time alone with her wife.

"I met this chick named Jane a few weeks ago," Snot said as he took the stage. "She married her girlfriend this morning and it's badass because they eloped. Jane's chick is something else, man, and like no girl you've ever met before, but Jane loves her. I mean, she really loves her so I thought I'd help her out. She wrote a song for her, but since she can't sing for shit, she gave it to me to sing for her. Maura Rizzoli, stand up."

Maura was flabbergasted. Jane had always told her she couldn't write lyrics, so she knew this song must have taken so much time and effort on her wife's part. To top it off, she was allowing it to be performed in public just hours after they had gotten married. With some help from her wife, Maura had finally overcome the initial shock and stood up. "Queen of the Dead," Snot announced. "This is for you."

"It's called 'Queen of the Dead'?" Roxie asked.

"Yeah," Jane said proudly. "Would you expect anything less from a grunge love song?"

A grunge love song is exactly what it was and Maura listened intently to the lyrics. Her wife had written about the flavored condom incident, kissing on the bridge, and an entire chorus about how much she loved her and what it was that she loved about Maura. When Snot sang the verse about spending their life together, Maura was moved to tears.

"You did this for me?" Maura asked in disbelief.

"You're my wife," Jane reminded her. "There's nothing I wouldn't do for you."

They were at a crowded venue, but Maura wasn't paying attention to who might have been looking at them. She wrapped her arms around Jane's and pressed her lips to hers. When she felt Jane slip her tongue into her mouth, she knew she wouldn't be able to hold back any longer.

"Let's get out of here," Jane suggested once the song was over.

Maura needed no further convincing. She grabbed her purse and stood up near the table as she waited for Jane.

"Where are you going?" Mark asked.

"To the room," Jane responded. "Thanks for everything tonight, but we really need to leave."

"We want to consummate our marriage," Maura announced.

"And we have some things to discuss," Jane said to save face.

"But we mostly want to consummate our marriage," Maura added.

The drive home took longer that Maura had hoped and the anticipation was becoming too much for her. To put her at ease, Jane gave her quick pecks at every red light and stop sign, but Maura was filled with so much need for Jane that she felt tempted to pull over in a secluded area. It would have been a quick release of the tension that had been building up for over thirty days and Maura would have been fine with that, but not on that night. It was going to be their first time making love to each other as a married couple and Maura wanted it to be memorable, not just for her but for Jane—especially for Jane.


	21. Jane Goes Knuckles Deep

**A/N: Thank you so much to all of you who have either left reviews or sent me private messages. Your responses to this story have really brightened my days and I'm glad there are some of you who share my love for Rizzles and the '90s. :)**

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From the moment they left her car, Maura had yet to let go of Jane's hand. She knew she and her wife were going to be inseparable for the rest of their lives, but the past month had nearly traumatized Maura. She experienced thirty-four days and nights of crying because she missed her and now that she was with Jane again, she vowed to never let go of her.

"Maur, I'm not going anywhere," Jane said after Maura had latched on to her in the elevator.

"I want as much physical contact with you as I can possibly have," Maura responded.

As adorable as she thought her wife was, it was impossible for her to move while Maura's arms were wrapped tightly around her. Out of fear of remaining in that elevator for the rest of their lives, Jane decided to take matters into her own hands. She grabbed Maura and playfully lifted her over her shoulder. Maura squealed with delight until she remembered just how short her black baby doll dress or 'wedding dress' was.

"Jane, my dress!" Maura brought to her attention, but Jane refused to put her down. Instead, she placed a hand on Maura's behind to keep her dress in place as she carried her down the hall to her dorm room.

When they stopped in front of room 804B, Jane and Maura noticed a sign made out of construction paper and glitter that read, '_Do not disturb. Marriage consummation in progress._' Underneath was another sign that said, '_Congratulations, Jane and Maura Rizzoli_,' followed by yet another, smaller and crudely constructed sign with the words, '_Jane Rizzoli is knuckles deep in vagina right now and all you're doing is reading this sign.'_

Maura let out a nervous laugh. "My friends."

"We're keeping these," Jane insisted. "And I'm taping that last one to the door of whatever apartment we live in."

"Do you brag about our sexual encounters?" Maura asked once they were inside her room. Her left eyebrow was raised, which made Jane unsure of how she was supposed to answer.

"I used to," Jane admitted. "But that's when you were my girlfriend. Nobody wants to hear about married couples having sex. Besides, you add a bead every time we do something. Your friends know what we do without you having to say a word."

Maura put her hands on Jane's shoulders in hopes of conveying the importance of what she was about to say. "Roxie is winning again. Stash has taken second place since Roxie became her girlfriend and Markie is ahead of me by five beads. I'm last, babe. Being without you for thirty-four days has put me far behind in my bead count."

Jane tried her hardest to be offended, but she couldn't get over how serious her wife was about the bead count. "Maura! This night is about making love to each other as a married couple, but all you care about is having more beads than your friends."

"I'm sorry," Maura said and she truly was sorry until she heard Jane start to laugh.

"I'm just as upset as you are," Jane insisted. "How bad do you think this makes me look? I'm supposed to be pleasing you and here you are in last place. Mark probably looks at these beads every time he's over here and silently gloats about getting more action than I am."

"He wasn't silent about it," Maura informed her. "He would look at the beads and say, 'I get it in more than Jane does' and then Markie would smack him on the arm for being so insensitive to my plight. She'd say, 'Don't talk about sex in front of Maura when she isn't allowed to see her girlfriend.'"

"My girlfriend," Jane smirked. "It seems like just yesterday you were my girlfriend."

"Yesterday, I _was _your girlfriend," Maura reminded her.

Jane had wanted to tell her wife that she was well aware that they were girlfriend and girlfriend yesterday, but instead she lifted Maura up and dropped her onto her bed. The force with which Maura landed on the bed caused her to bounce and she made a comment about being grateful she didn't hit her head.

"Stay this way," Jane insisted.

"Which way?" Maura asked.

"The way you're positioned."

Maura was on her back with her knees bent over the edge of the bed. Once she had seen Maura in that position, it didn't take long for Jane's libido to kick into overdrive. Every night that she was separated from Maura, Jane fantasized about having her in different positions and she felt as if this moment was taken directly from one of her fantasies. The only difference is Maura was now her wife and knowing that she'd be with Maura for the rest of her days and nights excited Jane even more.

Foreplay never had a significant role whenever they made love to each other, not because they didn't want to, but because they were either too impatient or they were on borrowed time as what happened whenever they were in the backseat of Maura's car; however, that night was going to be different. Jane had an entire night alone with Maura and she was going to make sure she took her time.

"I don't like this position," Maura told her. "Not for our first time."

Jane had planned on solely pleasuring Maura for the time being, but it wasn't what her wife wanted. "What position would you like?"

"I want you near me," Maura said softly. "We can try new positions later." She had expected her wife to cuddle up to her, so she was completely surprised when Jane got up and put a cassette in her boom box. It was a mix tape of alternative songs that she had made in mid-September to get Maura even more into the genre and Maura couldn't help smiling when the music started to play. Although what they were listening to wasn't romantic, it was so incredibly Jane.

"We need noise," Jane pointed out. "I don't want your friends to be listening to you moaning."

"How are you so sure that you're going to make me moan?" Maura asked. "You seem so hesitant to touch me."

"Pardon me for creating a mood," Jane said sarcastically.

There was her trademark sarcasm that Maura simultaneously hated and found irresistible. When Jane lied down next to her, Maura cuddled up to her as closely as she could. "Babe?" Maura asked. "Do you think we're the only couple to consummate their marriage to 'Give It Away'?"

"Maybe," Jane shrugged. "But I don't see why more couples wouldn't. It's a perfect song for a wedding night. Think about it, Maura. You're giving it away and '_What I've got you've got to get it, put it in you._'"

"Jane," Maura groaned.

"Don't blame me," Jane pointed out. "You walked right in to that one."

"I did," Maura agreed. "Do you think we could…this time?"

"I've been wanting to do that to you," Jane admitted. "I'm glad we waited for our wedding night. It'll mean more."

"It'll be meaningful regardless of when it is or how many times it has happened," Maura insisted. "What makes sex so meaningful is being with you and feeling so close to you. I know I'm going to feel this way for the rest of my life."

Her wife's confession is what put Jane at ease. Jane had been aching for Maura for over a month, but now that she was with her, she felt nervous and uncertain of herself. The fact that it was technically their honeymoon only served as an added pressure.

"I'm your wife now," Maura added. "Now and forever."

Jane had lost all of her inhibitions and her mind became clouded by what she was about to do with Maura. They hurriedly removed their clothes and their garments and undergarments became piled up in a mess near Maura's bed. They had planned on undressing each other slowly and sensually with the added element of teasing, but they could no longer hold back. Foreplay would be postponed until their second time. It had been over a month since the last time they had made love to each other and Maura considered the waiting to be foreplay enough.

While Jane was kissing her, Maura physically and emotionally prepared herself for what was about to happen. This was _Jane _she was with. Jane was her wife and the woman she loved; yet Maura still anticipated the pain of what she would experience. She wanted Jane to stimulate her clit. Maura needed to feel the friction from Jane's fingers on her most sensitive area, but Jane's hands were caressing every inch of her body besides where she wanted them the most. Maura was well aware of what Jane was doing. The waiting was turning her on and the more turned on she became, the less pain she'd feel when Jane entered her for the first time.

The moment Jane touched her clit, Maura felt as if she were about to come. The teasing and the month of fantasizing about this moment had taken their toll on Maura, but she focused on anything she possibly could to prolong the moment.

"You're soaked," Jane whispered in her ear. "This is what I do to you?"

Hearing her wife's voice was making it even harder for Maura to hold back. Her arousal was because of her wife and _only _her wife, but Maura could barely get a word in as Jane continued to stroke her. "I'm ready," she finally managed to say.

"I'm only starting with one finger," Jane informed her. "I want you to get used to the way I feel inside you."

Although Jane was being as gentle as she could be, Maura still winced when she entered her. The feeling wasn't as painful as she thought it would be, but there was a slight stinging sensation that Maura hoped would subside. "Add another," Maura insisted.

"You're not open enough for me," Jane told her. "Just relax and focus on what you're feeling right now. If you relax your muscles, you'll open up more. Or I could go down—"

"No," Maura interrupted her. "Stay here with me."

"What do you feel?" Jane asked to ease Maura's mind.

"You," Maura responded. "I feel my wife inside of me, connected to me, sharing an intimacy with me that no other woman has or ever will."

When she felt Maura was ready for her, Jane added a second finger. "You feel so good, Maur," she whispered into her ear.

"I do?" Maura asked. Until that moment, she had never thought about what this might feel like for Jane.

"You're so warm," Jane responded, her breathing growing heavier than it had been earlier. "And you're so tight. It's like you're holding on to my fingers and you want me to stay inside you."

Maura pressed her lips against her wife's. Once the stinging subsided, Maura was able to enjoy the moment she had waited so long for. Her wife was moving inside of her and never before had she felt something so beautiful. It was more than sexual pleasure for Maura; it was a new way of being intimate with Jane.

Her wife was so gentle and reassuring that night. They had the rest of their lives to experiment with different positions and in that moment all they wanted was the sweetness and intimacy that only came with making love for the first time as a married couple. It was close to dawn when Jane and Maura were both too exhausted to continue, but Jane still couldn't let go of her wife. What they had just experienced with each other was life-altering and it bonded them on an entirely different level. That afternoon, they planned to meet with Jane's parents, but until then it was just the two of them.

"I won't be in last place anymore," Maura added, but Jane was too exhausted to come up with some sarcastic response. Instead, she tucked a few strands of hair behind Maura's ear and pulled her even closer to her.

It wasn't long before Maura fell asleep holding on to Jane just as Jane was holding on to her.


	22. And Then Reality Sets In

Their positions had changed while they were sleeping, but somehow Maura had found her way back to Jane's arms and vice versa. Jane hadn't expected to wake up before her wife, so she wasn't sure what she should do. If they were still girlfriend and girlfriend, Jane would have woken her up, but now that they were a married couple Jane wondered if she should let Maura sleep. Whether or not newlyweds were supposed to wake up at the same time was beyond Jane. She stared adoringly at her sleeping wife for nearly five minutes until she realized Maura was much more fun when she was awake. Jane gently placed her left index finger on the tip of Maura's nose, but when her wife didn't even budge, Jane gave her wife's nose a playful tap. Maura's eyes crossed as she looked at Jane's finger on her nose and her facial expression made Jane smile. Never in her life had she seen something as lovable as a sleepy, cross-eyed Maura.

"I knew you'd be more fun if you were awake," Jane said before kissing a tiny freckle on her wife's face. "Did I ever tell you my goal in life is to kiss every single one of your freckles, but not all in a single night when I'm kissing your entire body? I want to kiss each one individually and memorize them."

"You have the rest of your life to do that," Maura beamed. She had never thought of herself as unattractive, but nobody she had ever met before made her feel as beautiful as Jane did.

"Maura Rizzoli," Jane recited. "_Mrs. _Maura Rizzoli, Jane Rizzoli's perfect wife."

Maura shook her head. "I'm not perfect."

"Perfect for me," Jane insisted.

"And _you _are perfect for _me_," Maura added. "I love my wife and my new last name."

Jane glanced at the alarm clock on Maura's nightstand. They were supposed to set the alarm for noon, so they'd have plenty of time to shower and have lunch, but the two of them were so exhausted that they had forgotten to set the alarm. It was now two o'clock in the afternoon and all they'd have time for is a quick shower and a few minutes to do their hair and makeup. Jane's hair and makeup routine consisted of a few swipes of mascara on her eyelashes, coating her lips with chapstick, and combing a handful of mousse through her curls. They had opted to shower separately because they knew showering together would lead to them spending more than an hour underneath the falling water. Maura's makeup routine was far more extensive than Jane's, but Jane always enjoyed watching Maura's step-by-step routine. Her makeup was so carefully applied and Jane watched in awe as her wife curled and sprayed her bangs with such precision.

"You don't need any of this," Jane said as she wrapped her arms around Maura's waist. "You're so beautiful. Nobody has a wife as beautiful as mine."

Maura turned around to face Jane. It was the sincerity in her wife's words that affected Maura. Jane wasn't saying this to make her feel better about herself or to prove she was a good wife, she honestly meant every word she said to Maura. "You're wrong," Maura pointed out. "Nobody has a wife as beautiful as _mine_. I'm so lucky to have you."

"And I'm so lucky to have you," Jane beamed. "You need to stop, Maurwife."

"What do I need to stop, Janewife?"

"Being so cute," Jane told her. "I can't get anything done when I'm so busy looking at you. Even when you're not trying to be cute, you're still cute."

Maura scowled at her. "So as not to distract you with my cuteness, I'll make this face every time I see you."

Jane couldn't help but laugh. "And you're even cuter when you're trying not to be cute at all."

Before Maura could respond, Jane lifted her up and carried her out of the bathroom and into her room. "I haven't properly moisturized!" Maura said as she stretched her arm out in a vain attempt at grabbing her moisturizer.

Jane and Maura hugged each other the moment they got into Maura's car. Both girls were trying to hold back their tears and they knew it was only a matter of time before one of them gave in and cried. They were having the time of their young lives while they were with their friends and while they were in Maura's dorm room, but now they were facing reality. They were on their way to tell Jane's parents and both Jane and Maura were nervous at the outcome.

"It's going to be okay," Jane reassured her. "No matter what my parents say, you and I aren't going to spend another night apart and we'll do whatever we have to do to make this work."

"My parents want to spend Christmas in Boston, so I cashed in my plane ticket," Maura informed her wife. "That's one thousand dollars for us."

"And Snot bought my Pearl Jam ticket," Jane added. "There's two hundred right there."

Maura looked at her wife in disbelief. "Jane, you've been looking forward to that concert for months! You and Mark talk about it whenever you're together."

"Our marriage is far more important," Jane pointed out. "I need to leave that part of my life behind now. We have twelve hundred dollars. That should be enough for a deposit on an apartment. Rent is about four hundred."

"My parents give me a three-hundred dollar allowance each month," Maura added. "You make two hundred?"

"Some months I make two hundred, some months I make three hundred," Jane informed her. "We'd be okay with rent, but then there's utility bills and groceries."

"I can get a job," Maura told her wife. "I can work with you at The Basement or I could get a job at the student store on campus."

"No," Jane insisted. "You need to focus on school. It's your dream to go to medical school and I don't want you to compromise that because of some mediocre grades you earned as a freshman because you didn't have enough time to study."

"But Jane—"

"No," Jane interrupted. "My coaching job is going to start up again next month and I can go to school part-time, so I can get another job."

"Three jobs?" Maura asked. "Jane, you'll be exhausted and you need to focus on school, too."

"I won't be exhausted," Jane insisted. "Coaching is something I do on my own time. I love the little girls I work with and I always have fun working with them. My job at the Basement is basically me just hanging out with Mark. I have time for a third job, Maur. I don't need to finish school in two years like I had planned. I can't get into the academy until I'm twenty-one, so there's no need for me to finish school at nineteen or twenty."

"And what about time for yourself?" Maura asked. "I can't let you work three jobs, Jane."

Jane held her wife's hands between hers. "Loving you has always been and will always be so easy for me, but not once did I think married life would be easy and I'm sure you didn't think it would either, yet we got married anyway. It shows that we believe in each other, Maura, and that's all I need from you. I need you to stand with me in this decision and believe in me. Our lives aren't going to be perfect, but our love is and I'm going to do anything I possibly can to make sure you're cared for and have a safe place to rest your beautiful head every night."

Maura removed her hands from Jane's and wrapped her arms around her wife. "I do believe in you and love you more than I have ever loved anyone in my entire life, but I'm still getting a job."

"Maura," Jane groaned.

"Marriage is a partnership," Maura pointed out. "And I want to contribute."

Jane smiled at her wife. There was not a single thing she could say or do that would get Maura to change her mind. Jane knew Maura was right; the two of them were in this together and if Maura wanted to contribute, Jane would have to be willing to accept her help.

Jane and Maura kissed each other as they sat in Maura's car. They were now parked along the curb in front of Jane's house, but neither Jane nor Maura were ready to face Jane's parents, so they decided to kiss and hold each other until they worked up the nerve to go inside. There were 'I love you' and the obligatory 'everything is going to be okay' exchanged between the two of them, but they still wondered _when _everything was going to be okay and what, exactly, they'd have to endure in the meantime.

Jane walked into the living room hand-in-hand with Maura. She may have seen herself as a grown woman ready to take on the responsibilities of married life, but she knew she looked like nothing more than a scared little girl at that moment.

"Ma!" Jane called out, her voice starting to quiver.

Even when Maura, Jane, Frank, and Angela were seated in the living room, Jane still hadn't let go of Maura's hand. By holding her hand, she hoped to convey not only to Maura but also to her parents how much she loved her and how she was never going to let go of her.

"Maura and I really love each other," Jane began. "And I know our love for each other will only grow stronger as time goes on."

"And now you're grounded for another month for sneaking around," Frank told his daughter.

"You can't ground me anymore, Pop," Jane told him just slightly louder than a whisper.

"What was that?" he asked, although he had heard her. "It sounded like you just said I couldn't ground you, Janie."

"You can't," Jane stammered. "Maura and I got married yesterday and I—"

"You did _what_?" Angela asked in disbelief. "We told you time and time again not to see her and then you go out and do something stupid like—"

"We love each other," Jane interrupted. "Maura and I know we're going to be together for the rest of our lives. We know we should have said something, but there's no point in talking about it when there's nobody listening to us and nobody believing in us. Everyone just thinks we're young and dismisses what we feel for each other as young love."

"So you do something immature like run away to get married?" Angela nearly shouted. "Janie, I can't even look at you right now. Pack your stuff. I want you out of here tonight."

The scared little girl had overcome the tough woman Jane was trying to be. She knew her parents were going to be upset, but never did she expect for them to turn her back on her. "But Ma—" Jane sobbed.

"I mean it, Jane!"

"Don't yell at her!" Maura intervened. "I'm her wife now and I'm not going to let you belittle her! Jane Rizzoli is a good young woman and I'm so proud of who she is and just as I'm proud to be her wife, you should be proud to be her parents." Maura no longer cared that her in-laws were watching them; she wrapped her arms around Jane and gently pressed her lips to hers. "Let's go pack," Maura whispered.

Jane had expected the heartache she was feeling to lessen after what Maura had said, but as she sat on her bed, she couldn't get herself to stop crying. Just as she did in front of Mr. and Mrs. Rizzoli, Maura held her wife as closely as she possibly could and let Jane sob into her shoulder. "It won't always be like this," Maura tried to reassure her. "Let's pretend it's one of our scenarios like we did with the mix tapes. The year is 2010 or maybe even as soon as 2007 and you're my Detective Rizzoli and I'm your medical examiner."

"My _chief _medical examiner," Jane corrected. "I can't imagine you being anything less than the best."

Maura smiled at her. "I'm your chief medical examiner and we're both passionate about what we do and about helping people and we make a perfect team."

"But it's 1994," Jane reminded her. "We're 18 and my parents don't respect us nor do they respect the love we have for each other."

"They're doing us a favor," Maura pointed out. "And we have to look at it that way. By not believing in us, they're only strengthening our bond and the love we have for each other."

Jane knew she had to pack, but in that moment, all she wanted to do was cling to Maura for as long as she could. Even as they heard a knock on Jane's door, Maura still held on to her wife.

* * *

**A/N: Sorry about the cliffhanger, but this is going to be one of those two-part chapters. Regardless, I hope you've enjoyed it and thanks for all of the lovely feedback on the last chapter. :)**


	23. Queen Butt Head: The Fourth Musketeer

Jane was surprised to see her mother standing in the doorway of her bedroom. Unsure of what was going to happen next, Jane continued to cling to Maura. Maura was her safe haven and, as long as she was in Maura's arms, she felt as if nothing could go wrong. Jane was well aware of _why _her parents were upset with her and it all had to do with Maura, but Jane knew Maura was worth anything she would have to endure. Maura was her entire world now and Jane didn't have a single regret about marrying her.

"Maura, would you give me some time with my daughter?" Angela asked. The calm in her voice put Jane and Maura at ease.

"I'll be in the kitchen," Maura announced. Before she left, she gave her wife a kiss on the cheek.

"I love you," Jane whispered.

"I love you, too," Maura responded. She looked adoringly at her wife before leaving. She didn't want to leave Jane, but she knew the importance of the talk Angela and Jane were going to have.

When Maura walked into the kitchen, she noticed fourteen-year-old Tommy Rizzoli sitting at the kitchen table with his Game Boy in hand. He was too absorbed in the game he was playing to even notice or care that Maura was sitting next to him. The girl that he had once called a "hot chick" was now an old married woman in his eyes. Maura wasn't particularly interested in what Tommy was playing, but she wasn't sure how long she'd be sitting at that table and she figured she might as well get to know her brother-in-law.

"What are you playing?" she asked, although she wasn't sure if he'd even respond.

"NBA Jam," he responded without even looking at her. "You married Jane?"

"Yes," Maura beamed.

"Why?"

Maura looked at her brother-in-law, but he still hadn't taken his eyes off of the screen. "I love your sister and I want to spend the rest of my life with her."

"Jane's a butt-head," Tommy pointed out. "And you married her. That makes you, like, Queen Butt-Head."

"Then I'll be Queen Butt-Head," Maura said proudly.

Tommy finally put his Game Boy down on the table and looked at Maura in the eyes. "Let's get this straight. Jane, Frankie, and me have a system. Me and Jane make each other's life hell and Frankie is caught in the middle. It's how we show each other that we care, but in the end we love each other and all three of us stick together. If me and Frankie lose our third musketeer, I don't know what we'll do. Jane comes up with all the ideas and all the cool shit to do, like on Halloween when she was in junior high she tied a devil mask to the front of a remote control car and used it to chase away this girl who made fun of her. And sometimes we hang out on the roof and talk about all kinds of things like sports and girls and action movies. Just me, Jane, and Frankie. And all that is going to change now."

"Nothing is going to change," Maura reassured him. "I'm not taking your sister away from you. She's my wife now, but she's been your sister since before you were born, and she will always be your sister."

"But she's married now," Tommy reminded her.

"She's still Jane," Maura pointed out. "She's still wearing her ripped jeans and that thermal shirt that's two sizes too big for her. Her hair is still unkempt. She still refuses to buy new Converse although the pair she owns is completely worn down and she still has scrapes on her knees and elbows from skateboarding. I love Jane for who she is just like you do."

"So you're not going to make her talk about things that married couples talk about like doing taxes and what color towels to buy for the bathroom? She can still talk about sports and Arnold Schwarzenegger movies?"

"She can talk about anything she'd like to talk about," Maura reassured him.

She was surprised when Tommy got up from his chair and walked toward her. "Give me a hug," he insisted. "You can hang out on the roof whenever you want. You're a Rizzoli now and our roof is your roof."

When Angela looked at her headstrong daughter reduced to nothing more than a sobbing mess with her head in her hands, she felt as if her heart was breaking. She wanted to be angry with Jane, but she just couldn't get herself to feel that way now that she was alone with her. She may have been married but she was still her little Janie. Deep down, she was still the same little girl who saved up her allowance to buy her a mother's day gift and the same little girl who once tried to stay up all night in hopes of seeing the tooth fairy after she lost her first tooth.

"Did you come to yell at me some more?" Jane asked, although her voice was quivering. "I love Maura and I'm not getting our marriage annulled."

Angela sat next to Jane on her bed and Jane was taken by surprise was her mom held onto her instead of yelling or being angry with her. "I'm not asking you to," Angela insisted. "And I'm not angry with you, Janie. Or should I call you Jane now?"

Jane wiped her tears on the sleeve of her thermal. The tattered cuff was now stained with Jane's mascara. "'Janie' is fine," Jane told her. She hadn't been fond of her nickname since she entered her teenage years, but this was the first time she had ever been asked about her preference and, in that moment, she saw 'Janie' as a peace offering, a way of telling her mom she still wanted to be her little girl.

"Look at this," Angela said as she began to fuss with the sleeve of Jane's shirt.

Jane shrugged. "What's wrong with it?"

"What's wrong with it?" Angela asked. "There's a hole in the cuff big enough for you to stick your thumb through it."

"I know," Jane snapped. "I did it myself. I was bored at work so I grabbed a pair of scissors."

"This shirt is too big," Angela pointed out. "Tomorrow we're going to go shopping."

"Ma, stop," Jane demanded. She broke away from her mother's embrace and quickly scooted herself over to the edge of the bed. "I don't want to go shopping. I like my clothes. I'm sorry I'm not like those girls who Frankie brings home, the ones with skirts and a lot of make-up. I'm not a cheerleader, but I'm me and I like who I am. I like my hair and my shoes and the music I listen to and the store I work at and I like Mark and I love Maura. This is the happiest I've ever been, Ma, and for once I just want you to be happy for me. I know I'm not the daughter you wanted—"

"Janie," Angela interrupted. "Don't you ever think that about yourself. I'm proud of who you are and I'm sorry about what I said in the living room. I was upset and I got carried away, but it's only because of what you getting married meant to me. Ever since you were a little girl, I imagined what your wedding day would be like. You'd be in a beautiful dress and—"

"I'd never wear a wedding dress," Jane clarified.

"I know," Angela sighed. "You probably had wedding jeans and they were probably ripped."

"I wore the good pair," Jane informed her. "They're free of holes. Only the best for my wedding day."

"I should be grateful for that," Angela teased. When Jane wasn't expecting it, she grabbed her by the arm and pulled her toward her. "I know my vision of your wedding day isn't what you want for yourself, but that's not what matters. What matters is that I wanted to be there. I wanted to see how happy you looked when you married Maura. I can imagine you smiling just the way you are right now. You always smile like that when someone even says her name."

"I can't help it," Jane blushed. "I love everything about her and I want you to love her, too. I know Maura is beautiful, but there's so much more to her than that. I've never met anyone like her and even if I lived to be a million, I'd never meet another Maura. I'm so lucky to have her, but she also says that she's lucky to have me. We're always doing things for each other and not because we have to but because we actually want to. And we have so much fun together. It doesn't matter what we're doing. We could be doing homework together and it'll still be fun as long as it's with her. She's like my wife and my best friend rolled up into a cute, strawberry blonde package. And kissing her is—I can spend _hours_ kissing her."

"You two can kiss," Angela began. "I just don't want you doing any of the other stuff."

"Maura's my _wife_," Jane reminded her.

Not wanting to get into a talk about her daughter's sex life, Angela insisted that they have Maura join them. Tommy was entertaining her with stories about what the three Rizzoli siblings have done over the years and the havoc they've wreaked and, as much as Maura was enjoying the stories, she found herself already missing her wife. She wondered how Jane was holding up and if she and her mom were a having a civilized conversation instead of Jane being yelled at again, so she was grateful when Angela called her over to Jane's bedroom with something to tell them. The suspense was getting to Jane and Maura, but neither was sure if they could handle what Angela was about to tell them. She had already told Jane to pack her stuff and she feared what might come next.

"Your father and I had a talk," Angela began. "Janie, we don't want you going anywhere, especially now and, Maura, I know Jane can't live in your dorm so you two were probably going to search for apartments. You two would be in a hurry and you've never looked for apartments before, so you'd probably get taken advantage of. We want to keep Janie here forever, but since we can't we want to make sure you two are living in a good neighborhood and paying a reasonable amount for rent. We're going to help you two look for an apartment, but not until after the holidays. For the rest of the month, you kids are living here."

"We can?" Jane asked in disbelief. "Maura and I can stay in my room…together?"

"Yes, together," Angela smirked. "You two are a married couple now, so you'll have your privacy. We won't bother you, but there are going to be some ground rules."

"Like what?" Jane asked, impatiently "What are they? I just want to keep Maura safe and warm. I'll agree to whatever they are. For once, I'm agreeing. That has to mean something."

"You both are going to clean up after yourselves," Angela commanded. "Jane, this means you're going to learn how to do your own laundry."

"I can do it for you," Maura insisted. "It'll be fun and—"

"No," Angela interrupted. "Jane needs to learn."

"But she's my wife," Maura reminded her. "If I want to do her laundry, I have the right. Jane could be in charge of other chores."

"Your wife is my daughter," Angela pointed out.

"Sorry," Maura said just slightly above a whisper.

"And no making love outside of your bedroom," Angela informed them. "I don't want to see it and I don't want to hear it, so keep it in the bedroom and keep it silent."

"Can we shower together?" Maura asked, but when Angela glared at her she knew what the answer to her question was going to be.

Jane looked at her two favorite women, subtly engaging in competitive behavior: Angela for her daughter and Maura for her wife. Jane knew she was going to be caught in the middle for as long as this living arrangement lasted (or maybe even for the rest of her life) and there were times when it might get awkward, but she still couldn't stop smiling.


	24. Chrissy the Meowcenary

Nearly a week had passed since Jane and Maura had gotten married, but the two of them had yet to actually experience married life. All of Maura's exams were in the morning, so she stayed in her dorm the entire week to avoid being late. Jane missed her wife, but she knew the brief separation was necessary for the two of them. Jane had her own final exams to focus on and, although she preferred to study with Maura, Jane did the next best thing and studied with Mark. Jane and Mark set aside five hours a day to prepare for their finals, but instead they became sidetracked with video games, MTV, and the occasional Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots battle. What started out as a battle for glory soon turned into an all-out war once Frankie, Tommy, and Mark's younger brothers joined them. When money became involved, there was no turning back for Jane and, in the end, she was twenty dollars richer and knew next to nothing about the material on her final exams until she had a cram-session with Mark.

Now that her finals were over and she felt as if she did relatively well, Jane was finally at ease. She had a month off of school, as did Maura, which meant the two of them would finally be able to spend every day with each other. There'd be no worrying about attending class or completing assignments. Instead, Jane planned on hour after hour of being attentive to her wife and having as much with fun with her as she possibly could. Jane would never admit it to Mark or her brothers, but she counted the minutes until she'd be reunited with Maura. Jane always enjoyed spending time with her best friend, but nothing could compare to spending time with Maura. Regardless of what they did, Maura always had a way of making the moment special for Jane. Sometimes there were kisses and moments spent cuddling on the couch while watching TV and other times it wasn't Maura's actions but her words that made Jane feel loved.

Jane glanced at the clock on the VCR in the living room and realized that Maura was due home in five minutes. Because her exams were over, Maura was going to bring all of the clothes and necessities she'd need for the next month. During winter break, Maura would still have access to her dorm room, but she had no desire to go back to campus once her friends left. She'd have a month's worth of luggage in her car and Jane wanted to be sure she was available to help her when she arrived, so she bundled up and sat outside her front door in the cold. While she waited for Maura, Jane contemplated how she'd greet her. Would she lift her up? Would she kiss her? Would she just hold her close? Jane had mentally compiled a list of over ten possibilities, but they all escaped her the moment she saw Maura pull into the driveway.

Maura noticed Jane looking at her, but she still wouldn't get out of her car. When she rested her head on the steering wheel, Jane made her way to the car without giving it a second thought. Something was wrong with her wife and she hoped it was unrelated to her parents' visit, but with the way Maura described her parents Jane had a feeling Maura's melancholy state was because of them.

Maura gingerly reached for her wife's hand the moment Jane sat on the passenger seat. "I've missed you."

Jane held Maura's hand up to her lips. A lip print from spearmint chapstick remained on Maura's hand, but Jane knew she didn't mind, especially at that moment. "Come here," Jane insisted. "I want to feel you." It was Jane's way of telling Maura she wanted to be her safe haven and fix everything to the best of her abilities in that moment and for the rest of their lives. Without saying another word, Maura unfastened her seatbelt and maneuvered her body to the passenger seat. While sitting on Jane's lap and her head rested securely on Jane's shoulder, Maura felt the hurt start to lessen.

"My mother called me at my dorm," Maura began. "It was the third conversation we've had the entire semester."

"Did you tell her about us?" Jane asked, hoping her wife's tears weren't because of yet another parent disapproving of their marriage.

"I couldn't," Maura informed her. "She knows nothing about you or our relationship. Whenever she calls, it isn't to talk about what is happening in my life. She calls to inform me of something. The first time was to tell me she wasn't coming to Parents' Weekend, the second was to tell me they were spending Christmas in Boston and this conversation was to tell me they wouldn't be spending Christmas here after all but they'll send my gifts. I wanted to tell her that I don't need gifts because I have a wife who has already given me everything I could ever want."

"But that would mean she'd have to have a conversation with you," Jane said as she held her.

"Exactly," Maura agreed. "Jane, I don't know what I'd do without you."

"And I don't know what I'd do without you, either," Jane added. "I used to be content with my life, but I was never truly _happy _until you became mine."

It dawned on Jane that had it not been for her and her family, Maura would have been alone in her dorm room, not just on Christmas, but for her entire winter break. With that in mind, Jane placed a series of kisses along Maura's jaw line. It was one of her ticklish spots and Jane was willing to be as playful as she could if it meant seeing Maura smile.

Jane was disappointed when her wife's facial expression showed no changes. Instead, she wrapped her arms around Jane, clinging to her as if her life depended on Jane. "Jane, do you want to have children?" Maura asked, her facial expression still unchanged.

"Someday, I guess," Jane shrugged. "I've never put much thought into it. Have you?"

"Not until recently," Maura admitted. "I want a family with you."

"Then we'll start a family of our own someday," Jane reassured her. "But not in the near future. Maur, I bought a Super Soaker this summer—a _Super Soaker. _I'm eighteen-years-old and I spent money from one of my paychecks on a water gun because Mark, his brothers, my brothers, and me wanted to have our own water wars."

"There's nothing wrong with being playful," Maura pointed out. "That's one of the benefits of marrying your college sweetheart; we're going to grow up together. We're a married couple, but we're still two eighteen-year-olds."

"Maurwife?"

"Yes, Janewife?"

"I know where this is headed," Jane said as she shifted the beanie Maura was wearing, the very same beat-up olive green beanie Jane had given her even before they had become a couple. "It's okay, Maur. I'm your wife and I'm here for you whenever you're ready to talk."

Maura twirled a few strands of her wife's curly hair around her finger as she mentally prepared herself for what she was about to say. "I want you to promise, when we have children, they'll never have to experience this benign neglect and everyday we'll tell them how much we love them."

"We're going to love them so much," Jane told her. "Just as we love each other. We'll have a perfect little family and everyone will hate us for it. We'll even take awkward family Christmas portraits at a department store while we're all wearing matching sweaters. Speaking of awkward family Christmas portraits, my brothers and I are picking up the Christmas photo that we take every year for our parents and then we're getting a tree. Have you ever picked out a tree?"

"No," Maura shook her head. "I've never had a Christmas tree before. No, I _have _had Christmas trees, but they were always professionally decorated. I've never picked one out or decorated one."

"That's changing tomorrow," Jane beamed. "You're going with me, Tommy, and Frankie to pick out a tree and then the two of us can decorate it together. I even have a surprise for you."

"What is it?" Maura asked.

Jane playfully rubbed her nose against Maura's. "You'll find out soon enough."

Maura leaned in to kiss her wife. The familiar flavor of Jane's chapstick put her at ease. It had been nearly a week since she had kissed Jane and she had longed for the softness of her lips and the closeness she felt between them whenever they kissed.

"Do you hear that?" Jane asked, breaking their kiss.

Maura leaned in to kiss her again. "It sounds like a kitten."

Not longer than a second had passed before Jane pulled away. "Maur, it's cold out there. We can't leave a defenseless kitten in the cold."

Maura was curious as to why her wife was so insistent on taking care of this kitten, so she grabbed her by the hand and followed the sound of the kitten's meow. There, on the porch, was Tommy holding a kitten with a red bow tied around its neck.

"She's yours," Jane whispered into her ear.

Maura waited for no further explanation. Once she heard the kitten was hers, she quickly made her way over to Tommy and took the kitten. When Maura cradled her in her arms, she heard her kitten start to purr. Maura had never had a pet before, let alone one that had taken to her so quickly. "You're so beautiful," Maura whispered.

"She already loves you," Jane commented. "She has never purred like that with me or with Tommy."

"I'll leave you three alone," Tommy said before quickly petting the kitten. "Have fun with your moms, Meowcenary."

"Meowcenary?" Maura asked after Tommy had gone back inside.

"That's what I named her," Jane proudly stated. "I think it suits her perfectly."

"No," Maura responded. "She's our baby and she needs a beautiful name. How about Chrissy? She's Chrissy the Christmas kitten."

"Chrissy the Meowcenary," Jane suggested, but she changed her mind when Maura gave her a worried look. "Or just Chrissy."

"Are your parents okay with us having her?"

"They're fine with it," Jane insisted. "Ma even went with me to adopt her and to pick out a litter box and kitten food."

Chrissy playfully touched her paw to Maura's cheek. "Babe, you adopted her just for us?"

"Ma and I went to an animal shelter today," Jane informed her. "Little Chrissy was the runt of the litter and her mom abandoned her. She was starving and alone when she was rescued, but they were able to nurse her back to health and here she is now. She's a little survivor."

"You were abandoned by your mom, too?" Maura asked Chrissy in a soft tone of voice. "Our moms didn't want us, but we have each other now and we have Jane. We'll always have Jane."

"We're a little family now," Jane beamed. "Me, you, our kitten child. I don't think this is what Ma was referring to when she talked about grandchildren, but she said she'd be more than happy to be Chrissy's grandma."

"Jane, this is the best surprise anyone has ever given me."

"There's another one tomorrow," Jane said as she wrapped her arms around Maura. "You're getting a surprise everyday from now until Christmas."

"Jane?"

"Hmm?"

"You wanted to name our cat Meowcenary," Maura pointed out. "Promise me if we have children, I'll get to name them."

"I can't promise that," Jane stated. "While you're in recovery, I might just put some name of my choosing on the birth certificate."

Maura let that last statement slide. They were years away from having a baby, but for now Jane, Maura, and Chrissy were a little family of their own. There were days of surprises ahead for Maura, but Maura wanted to make sure there was an equal amount of surprises in store for Jane.


	25. Caught Between Her Mom and Her Wife

**A/N: We've already reached the 25th chapter and there are still 97974974396353121 chapters to go. Okay, maybe not that many, but you get my point. Thank you so much to all of you who've been sticking with this story and the little journey of wedded bliss that Jane and Maura are on. :)**

* * *

The mirror in the bathroom was fogging up as Jane brushed her teeth and, although she had already applied mousse on her hair, the steam from the hot water in the shower had already begun to make her hair frizz. When Jane wiped the mirror with her hand, she noticed her mascara was slightly smudged under her lower eyelid, but it was all worth it because her wife was taking a shower behind a very see-through shower curtain. When she finished brushing her teeth, Jane stared in awe at the woman in the shower. Her mouth was agape and she felt almost guilty for staring although the woman she was staring at was her own wife—her wife whom she had permission to kiss and to touch whenever she so desired. The sight of Maura lathering soap all over her body was just too much for young Jane and she had to leave before her libido got the best of her.

"Babe?" Jane squeaked. The sound of her voice took her by surprise and she hoped Maura hadn't noticed. When Maura began to laugh, Jane wanted to lean against the wall and sink all the way down to the floor. _So much for badass points with your wife._

"Yes?" Maura asked.

"I have to leave," Jane squeaked yet again. _Jane, what's wrong with you? You're not a virgin. She's your wife. You've seen her naked before. You saw her naked last night. You had sex with her this morning. You'll probably have sex with her tonight. _Jane looked down at the front of her pants. _Be glad you're a girl. At least you can hide it._

"Don't leave," Maura shouted above the sound of the water. "I was hoping you could help lotion my body."

_On second thought. _Jane just couldn't say no to rubbing lotion on her wife's body and maybe even being thanked with a kiss, a kiss that Jane hoped would lead to so much more.

"Janie!" Angela shouted as she knocked on the door. "Rule number three was no showering together."

"Ma," Jane groaned, unsure if she was more annoyed by the fact that her mother was bringing up the rules or because she had interrupted her opportunity to rub lotion on Maura's body.

After hearing her mother-in-law, Maura quickly shut off the water and put on her bathrobe. She knew this conversation was nowhere near being over, so she motioned for Jane to open the door. "We weren't showering together," Maura pointed out. "Jane was brushing her teeth and she was fully clothed the entire time she was in here."

"I'm going to let it slide just this once," Angela informed them. "Oh, and Janie, I picked up some more of your zit cream. You told me you were out of it."

"Ma, I don't use zit cream," Jane scoffed. "Tommy does."

"Tommy uses Stridex pads," Angela pointed out. "You use the spot-treating cream that makes you look like a Dalmatian when you sleep."

"I do _not _look like a Dalmatian," Jane insisted. "I haven't even used that cream since high school."

"You used it the night before Maura came home," Angela reminded her. "And your pads are on your bed. I bought the heavy flow ones you asked for."

Jane's face started to redden. If she hadn't been caught between her wife and her mother, she would have ran to her room and hid underneath the covers. "Why are you saying this in front of Maura?"

"She's your wife. She's not your girlfriend or a girl you're having a fling with. Marriage isn't just about making love and sharing a bed. Maura needs to know these things about you."

"Things like zit cream and heavy flow days?" Jane asked. "Maura doesn't need to know about that."

"She uses the heavy flow pads on her second and third day. She uses the light days on her first, fourth, and fifth," Maura told Angela. "I've also noticed she becomes even more sexually aroused than usual for an entire week before she starts her period, not just when she's ovulating"

"Maura," Jane groaned.

"That I didn't need to know," Angela insisted.

"I'm her wife," Maura pointed out. "I know her very intimately."

Jane was grateful for a diversion in the form of their kitten. Chrissy had squeezed her way into the bathroom and started to rub her head against Jane's shin. "Chrissy, are you hungry?" Jane asked in a playful voice. It didn't matter to Jane if their kitten was hungry or not, she was going to fill her dish with kitten food and maybe a treat as a way of thanking her for getting her out of that awkward situation.

"Janie?"

"Yes, Ma?" Jane asked nervously.

"Do you want to explain the copy of _Playboy _I found when I was putting away the socks that you left in the laundry room?" Angela asked. "You know your father and I don't allow that type of filth in the house."

"Yes, Jane," Maura glared at her. "Would you like to explain why you have an issue of _Playboy_?"

"No," Jane shook her head. "I wouldn't like to explain."

"Can I have a moment alone with my wife?" Maura asked.

Jane watched her mother grab Chrissy and leave the bathroom. Jane had hoped to feed their kitten, but now there was no using her as an excuse. She was left alone with a very irritated wife and Jane was dreading the conversation that was about to take place. She expected Maura to yell at her or at the very least give her a lecture, but Jane was taken by surprise when Maura looked hurt.

"Am I not good enough for you?" she finally managed to ask after nearly a minute of uncomfortable silence. "Do you want me to look like the women in your magazine?"

"Maura—"

"I'm only eighteen, Jane," Maura interrupted. "My body is still developing. My hips are still taking shape and my breasts will most likely grow another cup size by the time I'm twenty."

Jane wanted to comfort her wife, but she wasn't quite sure what to say. In her eyes, Maura was perfect and it pained her to know that Maura would compare herself to any other woman. Jane noticed the tears start to flow from Maura's eyes. She looked at Jane and waited for her to do something or at the very least say something, but Jane stood there staring at Maura. When Maura's sobbing began, Jane felt as if her heart had just been shattered.

"Maur," she said as she rushed to her side. Jane tried to put her arms around her wife, but Maura scooted back the moment Jane reached for her.

"Jane, please don't."

"Can I explain?" Jane asked. "You told me I could explain earlier."

Maura cleared her throat. "Explain."

"I love you," Jane began. "I bought that magazine when I was with Mark on my eighteenth birthday. I didn't buy it because I wanted it; I bought it because I was eighteen and I was finally of age to buy it. We also bought a pack of cigarettes. I didn't smoke any, but Mark smoked the entire pack over the course of a week. We also went to Stuevie's for the first time."

Maura looked her square in the eyes. "Do you look at those women, Jane?"

"I did," Jane admitted. "But that was before I met you. You're the first woman I've ever been with—the first and the last. I was a virgin, Maur. So were you. I was curious about sex and all I had were fantasies of women and I had these urges that—"

"You masturbated while looking at that magazine," Maura said matter-of-factly.

"Maura," Jane groaned. "Yes, I did, but that was only before I met you. From the night I met you, you've been the only woman I've fantasized about. You're beautiful, Maura, and I don't want you comparing yourself to any other woman. While you were in the shower, I couldn't take my eyes off of you. Even when we're in a crowded place like Stuevie's with dozens of other women, I can't take my eyes off of you and it has been that way since the night I met you and that's how it's going to be for the rest of our lives."

Maura could no longer keep even the smallest distance from her wife. She moved in for a hug and, although she had expected Jane to be playful and lift her up or at the very least try to untie her robe, Jane just held her close and let Maura nuzzle her head onto her shoulder. "Marriage isn't as easy as I thought," Maura admitted. "I wouldn't call this a fight, but it was a disagreement and it escalated because I didn't allow you to communicate with me."

"We're not perfect," Jane pointed out. "What matters is that we talked our way through it. That's what we need to do, Maur. We need to talk to each other. There's always going to be disagreements, but we can't let them get the best of us. I think we did okay for our first argument. We didn't resort to childish name-calling like some couples do."

"We argued for the first time and tonight we can make up for the first time," Maura hinted.

"Or now," Jane suggested.

"Rule number one: no sex outside of our bedroom," Maura recited.

"Rule number five: Jane and Maura no longer care about the rules," Jane teased, although she was actually afraid of what the consequences would be if she didn't abide by the rules.

"Janie!" Angela called out.

"Janie is about to have sex," Maura said just barely above a whisper.

"You're just as afraid as I am," Jane pointed out. "You whispered."

"Janie!" Angela repeated.

Jane gave Maura a quick peck on her lips. "I love you. We'll make up later, okay? Get dressed so we could pick out our Christmas tree." When Maura untied her bathrobe, Jane became hesitant to leave. _This better be important, Ma. _

"Sit down," Angela instructed the moment Jane had set foot in her parents' room. Her mother had a calm tone of voice, which only added to Jane's uneasiness.

Jane plopped down on her parents' bed and laid on her back with her arms stretched out. "What's up?"

"Is everything okay with you and Maura?"

"Yeah," Jane shrugged. "I guess."

"You passed your first marriage test," Angela smirked.

"This was a test?" Jane asked in disbelief. "You set this up to test Maura and me?"

"And you passed," her mom informed her. "I wanted you kids to realize that conflict is normal in a marriage. What matters is how you handle these conflicts. I've said this before but I'm going to repeat myself, marriage isn't just about making love and sharing a bed."

"Glad we could have this talk," Jane stated as she hurriedly got up from the bed. "Thanks, Ma." She had wanted to leave as quickly as possible, so she could return to her now very amorous wife who was wearing nothing but a bathrobe, but when her mom grabbed her wrist, she was prevented from going any further.

"Janie?"

"Yes?" Jane asked nervously.

"I didn't know you had an issue of _Playboy _in your room," Angela began. "But I know now."

"You got me to incriminate myself?" Jane scoffed. "And you managed to get Maura on your side."

"I like Maura. She and I could join forces," Angela smirked. "Oh, and, Janie? Hand over the magazine. I don't care how old you are; that filth is not allowed in this house."


	26. Rambo and the Initiation of Maura

**A/N: Thank you so much for all of the comments on the last chapter. I smile uncontrollably when I read them. For those who wondered when Jane and Maura are getting their own place, it's happening very soon, but there's still holiday fluff in store for them first. I hope you all have a very happy New Year. :)**

* * *

While at a department store just outside of Boston, Maura held onto a wallet-sized portrait of the three Rizzoli siblings. Maura had seen family portraits before, but none had ever been quite like the portrait she was holding in her hand. Instead of matching sweaters or formal attire, the Rizzoli siblings had decided to dress as Rambo, complete with matching charcoal gray tank tops and red bandanas tied around their heads. Maura knew Frankie and Tommy loved and accepted her as their sister, but looking at the portrait in her hand made her realize that she was a Rizzoli only by marriage, which meant she wouldn't always be included. She wouldn't have a stocking hanging near the fireplace and she wouldn't be in the family portrait with Jane, Frankie, and Tommy. With no siblings of her own, Maura had never known what it was like to have a sibling rivalry or complain about parents being unfair. She also had never known what it was like to stay up late with a brother or sister on Christmas Eve to try and spot Santa. There were times when Maura wished she had a sibling, but never as much as when she was around the Rizzoli siblings. The three of them had their occasional disagreements, but they'd do just about anything for each other. The more time Maura spent with them, the more she learned about the inner workings of the Rizzoli family and the more she longed to be one of them. As the oldest of the Rizzoli siblings, Jane was always in charge and she'd take advantage of every opportunity she was given to boss her brothers around, but it was obvious to Maura how much she loved them and how she'd do just about anything for them. Jane Rizzoli may have had a tough exterior, but she was really a loving, family-oriented young woman and Maura found those qualities so endearing in her wife.

"What do you think?" Tommy asked as he looked at the picture with Maura and his sister.

"Good, but nothing is as good as the Christmas photos from '76 and '77," Jane pointed out. "Those were the best."

Tommy gave his sister a confused look. "You were the only one in them."

"Yeah, and that's why they were the best," Jane insisted.

"This is going to look crazy next to our cousins' picture," Tommy laughed.

"Is that why you do this?" Maura asked.

"It's become a tradition," Jane informed her. "My cousin Jessie, the Little Miss Perfect that I told you about, and her brothers and sisters always take these perfect Christmas photos, but there's nothing special about them."

"Nothing stands out," Tommy added. "Their pictures always look boring, but they're boring so I guess it fits."

"Ma and Pop were tired of Grandma comparing us to them," Jane continued. "So, they let us do whatever we want and wear whatever we want in these portraits and we give one to Grandma every year and they get included in the Christmas cards that Ma sends out. It's our way of saying we're not perfect like our cousins and we don't care."

"Every year, the three of us put different themes in a jar and then pull one out," Tommy informed her. "If we all agree, we'll end up using it. Last year was 'I'm with stupid' and the year before that was grunge, which meant we basically dressed as bad as Jane does everyday."

"I love the way she dresses," Maura said defensively. "She was wearing ripped jeans the night I met her and I wanted her from that very moment."

"I love the way _you _dress," Jane pointed out. "I love your blazers and your skirts and I really love your short baby doll dresses."

"Why is that?" Maura asked playfully.

"Easier access," Jane whispered into her ear.

When they started kissing in front of everyone at the department store's portrait studio, Tommy felt obligated to intervene. "No one ever wants to see their sister make out," he told them. It didn't exactly bother him when his sister kissed Maura and he was happy that the two of them had found each other, but what he didn't want was for Jane and Maura to overhear any ignorant comments.

"Dykes," some guy commented as he walked by with his mother.

"Hey!" Tommy shouted out. "You're just jealous because neither of them would ever date you even if they were straight. Have fun shopping with your mommy."

"Thanks, little bro," Jane laughed when she saw the guy turn beet red.

"Some people are just assholes," Tommy responded. "How do you guys do it? I mean, when I kiss a girl in public no one says anything, but you two get so much shit talked about you. Either that, or you get people drooling. It sucks and I wish it were different."

"Me, too," Jane agreed. "But I love Maura and I don't care who knows it. We hear what people say, but it doesn't stop me from holding her hand or kissing her. I'm never going to see these people again, so they're opinions don't matter. What matters to me is Maura and making sure she knows she's loved. Sometimes I'll look at her or listen to what she's saying and I can't stop myself from wanting to hold her hand or hug her no matter where we are. She's this perfect woman and I feel so lucky to be her wife. That's how much I love Maura and I hope you can find that type of love someday, but let's not get all emotional right now."

"No, let's not," Tommy agreed. "We don't want to make it weird. Should we punch each other in the arm just to be safe?"

"Or hug," Maura suggested.

"That would be making it weird," Jane brought to her attention. "How about if I hug you instead?"

Instead of hugging, Jane lifted her up and spun her around. She would have continued regardless of how much Maura protested, but when Frankie arrived with a shopping bag in hand, Jane knew it was time to let Maura's feet touch the ground again. The moment Jane had been waiting for had finally arrived and she couldn't wait to see the expression on her wife's face.

"This is for you," Frankie told Maura as he handed her the shopping bag.

"Me and Frankie didn't know what to get you for Christmas, so we thought we'd pay for this instead of having Jane pay for it," Tommy added. "Open it."

"You didn't have to get me anything," Maura insisted, although she was excited to find out what was in the bag. She pulled out a gray tank top and a red bandana, exactly like the ones Jane, Frankie, and Tommy wore in the Christmas portrait.

"We're all wearing our tanks underneath our clothes," Jane pointed out. "And our bandanas are in our pockets. All we need is for you to get dressed."

Maura was nearly moved to tears. "You three are—"

"We're re-taking the picture," Frankie interrupted. "Ma and Pop are okay with it. They want all four of their kids in the picture."

"It's too late to send this one out in the Christmas cards," Tommy added. "But this one is going to be hanging up in the living room."

Maura had never considered herself a hugger, but at that moment she pulled both of them in for a group hug against their will. For the first time in all of her eighteen years, Maura felt as if she were part of a family.

"Maura is fourth," Tommy pointed out. "This means I get to boss her around."

"Maura is second," Jane corrected him. "It goes by birth order."

"No," Tommy argued. "It goes by the amount of years you've lived in our house. That makes Maura fourth."

"It goes by birth order," Jane dictated. "I'm the oldest, so if I say it goes by birth order, it goes by birth order. Either way I'm first and what I say goes. Maura is second, Frankie is third and, Tommy, you're fourth."

"That's fine," Frankie agreed. "I still get to boss Tommy around."

"Someday, Jane, I'm going to marry a woman older than you so you won't be first anymore," Tommy stated.

"Okay," Jane shrugged. "I'll be second, but you'll be fifth. You're just moving further down on the Rizzoli chain of command either way."

"Just quit, Tommy," Frankie told him. "Quit now."

"First and second in command are going to the fitting rooms," Jane announced. "This argument is over."

The fitting rooms attendants usually allowed just one person per room, but since nobody was around, Jane managed to sneak in with Maura. She had planned on letting her wife get dressed, but the moment Maura took off her sweater, Jane could no longer resist her. She still hadn't calmed down from seeing Maura in the shower and, since they were alone, Jane saw it as the perfect opportunity.

"We never made up," Jane reminded her.

"And we've never made love in a fitting room," Maura added before going straight to the button on her wife's jeans.

Jane stopped Maura's hand when she began to unzip her. "You first."

"Simultaneously," Maura suggested.

Frankie shook his head in disbelief when he saw his sister and his sister-in-law return nearly half an hour later. "I don't want to know," he insisted. "Jane's smile says it all."

"And Maura is walking a little funny," Tommy pointed out. "What were you guys doing for so long?"

"Do the words 'Jane's smile says it all' mean nothing to you?" Frankie asked.

"It's time for the picture," Jane announced in hopes of changing the subject.

With matching tanks and bandanas, the four of them posed for the camera. For Jane, Frankie, and Tommy it was just another family portrait, but for Maura it meant so much more. Posing with them in matching clothes made her feel as if she finally belonged.

"I love you," she whispered to Jane in between shots.

"I love you, too," Jane responded. "And I'm ordering an extra 8x10 just for us. We're going to need a picture to hang up when we get our own place."

_Our own place. _Just the thought of having a place with Jane made Maura start to smile. Her parents may not have wanted to see her on Christmas, but that no longer phased Maura. She was a Rizzoli now and as she smiled for pictures with her wife and brothers, she felt as if her initiation into the family was complete. This was the greatest holiday season Maura had experienced and, when it ended, it would be time for her and Jane to start their new life together in their own place.

When they returned home from the department store, Maura noticed a stocking hanging from the mantle with her name embroidered on it. It was her first stocking, her first Christmas portrait, and her first Christmas with the woman she loved.


	27. The Significance of Back, Back, B

**A/N: Thank you for all of the kind words. I know I just updated this two days ago, but I was inspired to update it again. I hope you all had a fun New Year's Eve and are enjoying the start of 2013. Now, on to the young Rizzles fluff.**

* * *

Jane woke up to find their clothes scattered on the floor of their bedroom. The temperature that night had dropped down to the single digits, but neither of them had the energy to change into their pajamas, so they fell asleep naked and holding on to each other not just for warmth but because they still had the need to feel each other. Jane could no longer count the amount of times she and Maura had made love since they had gotten married, but she felt as if each time were more special than the last because each time she made love to Maura she learned something new about her. She'd discover another erogenous zone or even something as seemingly insignificant as notice a freckle she had never seen before. After she quickly put on some pajama pants and a thermal shirt, Jane looked adoringly at her sleeping wife. Maura was sleeping so peacefully and she had a slight smile on her face, which made Jane wonder if she was dreaming and, if she were, what she was dreaming about.

She grazed her fingertips along Maura's arms. _Her skin is so cold. This is what happens when I stop holding her. _She could have held her, but Jane decided to do the next best thing. She grabbed a couple of fleece blankets from her closet and lovingly draped them over Maura. Maura stirred when she felt the added blankets against her skin; it was yet another gesture that Jane considered absolutely adorable. She pursed her lips over a tiny freckle on Maura's cheek and once her lips made contact, Maura finally opened her eyes.

"What were you dreaming about?" Jane asked. "I noticed you smiling."

"Nothing," Maura responded. "I've been awake this entire time. I just wanted to see what you'd do. Your first instinct was to keep me warm and comfortable."

"Keeping you comfortable has always been my first instinct and it will always be my first instinct," Jane reminded her. "I was thinking about how lucky I am to see you this way. You look so beautiful right now and I'm going to wake up to you every morning for the rest of my life."

Maura playfully grabbed Jane by the collar of her sweatshirt and pulled her in for a kiss. "I have a surprise for you."

"It isn't Christmas yet," Jane pointed out.

"You've been giving me surprises all month," Maura responded. "You've given me a ring, mix tapes, our kitten, my first family portrait and somewhere to stay during the holidays. For once, let me do something for you, Jane."

Jane handed her wife some pajamas. She had wanted to hug Maura, but she feared she'd start crying if she did. She was always so caught up in spoiling Maura that she had failed to notice that her wife had wanted to spoil her just as much. Their marriage wasn't going to be one-sided and Maura wanted to do little things for Jane to give her reassurance that she was loved and appreciated.

Maura grabbed an immaculately wrapped gift from underneath Jane's bed and handed it to her. The gift was no bigger than the palm of her hand and it wasn't store-bought, but she hoped Jane would cherish its sentimental value and all of the work she put into it.

Jane eagerly tore open the wrapping paper to reveal a small wooden-frame ornament that Maura had painted green and written on with red, glittery puffy paint. In the middle was a picture of the two of them that had been taken the day they got married. It wasn't the most flattering picture, but it was Maura's favorite because she had never seen Jane look as happy as she did in that picture. Above the picture were the words, '_Our First Christmas' _and below the picture, Maura had written the year '_1994_'.

"I made it while you were at work yesterday," Maura stated as she looked at her wife. Jane was too busy holding the ornament up by its red stain ribbon to pay attention to what she was saying. "I hope you like it."

"I love it," Jane told her after a long pause. "I was just imagining how our tree is going to look in thirty years."

"Why thirty years?" Maura asked.

"I think we should start a tradition," Jane beamed. "We'll make one of these every year. When there's too many to hang on the tree, we can find a different way to display them."

"Let's do it," Maura giggled. "It'll be fun to see how much we change throughout the years and our children and grandchildren will also be able to see. Can you picture our grandchildren asking us questions about our youth while we're all sipping hot chocolate near the fireplace?"

"We'll tell them about Stuevie's," Jane began. "And our first kiss on the bridge."

"We can't forget to tell them about how you asked me to be your girlfriend while we were playing in a pile of leaves," Maura insisted.

"And everything we went through to be together," Jane added. "We could have given up, but we didn't."

"This is turning into a story about teenage rebellion," Maura pointed out.

"Yeah," Jane agreed. "We'll leave out the part about us running away to get married."

"Although it's the best part," Maura insisted. "Can we play the mix tapes for them?"

"Some of the mix tapes," Jane responded. "I don't know what I'd do if our grandchildren someday learn that I put a song called 'I Wanna Sex You Up' on a mix tape for you."

"Because it's about sex or because it's a pop song and you don't want to ruin your alternative rock or grunge image?" Maura quipped. "Jane Rizzoli likes Color Me Badd. Jane Rizzoli likes Ace of Base. Jane Rizzoli likes Boyz II Men—"

"Jane Rizzoli likes Maura Rizzoli," Jane said as she playfully topped Maura. Maura began squirming underneath her, but Jane continued to tickle her and place sloppy kisses on her neck and jaw line.

"Is this your new version of foreplay?" Maura asked.

"No," Jane insisted. "But this is." She repositioned herself in between Maura's legs and, as if it were a reflex, Maura wrapped her legs tightly around Jane's waist to pull her even closer to her. Jane had to be at work in a couple of hours and she knew this would put her behind schedule but, as always, there was no way she could resist Maura.

Jane's shift ended at seven that night, which gave her an entire evening to spend with Maura. It was another cold night in Boston, but Jane was in no mood to stay indoors, so after work she picked Maura up and treated her to dinner. They were low on funds, but neither minded that their dinner date was at a local pizza place frequented by college students instead of a nice restaurant.

Not ready for their date to end, Jane and Maura decided to walk around near Park Street. There were couples walking hand-in-hand all around them and children riding on sleds and building snowmen. Jane never admitted it to anyone, especially Mark, but she had always wanted to go for a walk with a girl in the snow and, as her gloved fingers were intertwined with Maura's, she realized it was even better than she had hoped it would be.

"What did you do while I was at work?" Jane asked.

"Tommy taught me how to play Mortal Kombat," Maura informed her. "I now know the significance of you and Mark shouting out 'Back, Back, B.' Once I mastered that move, I beat Tommy twenty-seven times and I beat Mark's little brother thirty times."

"Maurwife?"

"Yes, Janewife?"

"Never have I been more proud to be married to you," Jane teased. "If we ever need extra cash, we can always go to the arcade and hustle Mortal Kombat the way people hustle pool. All these middle school boys will take one look at you and either be so enticed by your beauty that they'll do anything just to play the game next to you or they'll think you can't play and they could make easy money off of betting against you. We'll be millionaires."

"It's a thought," Maura smiled. "I have an interview with Jerry tomorrow and, if I get the job, my paychecks from working at The Basement will add to the millions we'll earn from hustling Mortal Kombat."

"You'll get the job," Jane insisted. "If Mark and I got hired, you'll definitely get hired. Jerry says Mark and I are like the illegitimate children he never wanted or knew he had until we both showed up on interview day. We're like a little family at that store and you're family now."

Just as she always did, Jane had comforted Maura. Her wife had brought out a more confident and playful side to herself that she never knew existed. The two of them spent the rest of the evening walking around in the snow, stopping only to have the occasional snowball fight that would result in them laughing uncontrollably like children. Maura was uncertain about the job interview and what the future held for them financially but, in that moment, she managed to set those worries aside and focus on being young again with Jane.


	28. Big Boy and Big Girl Problems

After having a date night with Jane, Maura went to her interview the next morning feeling confident. While they sipped hot chocolate at a local coffee shop to warm themselves up after playing in the snow, Jane prepared Maura for her interview. Jerry's interviews weren't difficult, but it was going to be Maura's first job interview and she was already feeling nervous and slightly intimidated. Jane didn't remember every question she had been asked during her own interview and she wasn't sure if Jerry had switched it up a little, but she tried to help Maura prepare as best as she could. Maura's interview skills were sub-par and she rarely communicated with anyone other than her wife, her friends, and the Rizzoli family, but Jane still had a feeling that Jerry would like her. It may have been based on the fact that Jane loved her so much and she wanted everyone to like Maura as well, but Jane still held on to that glimmer of hope that Maura would get hired and some of the financial burden would be taken off of her. Jane had promised Maura that she'd be able to take care of her, but the more Jane looked at the cost of rent, utilities, and groceries, the more she worried about being the sole breadwinner of their little family.

With Maura at her interview, Jane decided to walk next door to Mark's house. While sitting on an old beanbag chair in Mark's room, Jane felt like her former self. She reminisced about the times just months ago when she'd spend hour after hour in Mark's room. Jane would spend so much time at his house that the top bunk of his bunk beds became hers and she'd sleep there every Friday night. She missed the nights of video games, horror movies, and talking about anything that came to mind. Jane had once felt as if Mark was all she needed and vice versa, but before they could truly comprehend what was happening everything changed for the two of them. Jane looked at the bed that had once belonged to her and she realized she would never be sleeping there again.

Jane decided to break the silence. "I love her."

"Extra! Extra! Jane loves her wife," Mark said sarcastically and Jane threw a hackey sack at him with full force, hitting him right in the arm.

"You didn't let me finish," she snapped.

Mark threw the hackey sack back at her. "Testy, aren't we? You on your period?"

"Mark!" Jane fumed. "Can you please be serious?"

"Why?" he asked. "Jane, what the hell's wrong with you? You've changed, man. Ever since you've gotten married, you've become someone I don't even know anymore."

"I love Maura, but sometimes I think I made a mistake," Jane admitted. "Moments like this one make me wish Markie had never walked into The Basement and we never would have gone on that double date."

"Jane, shut up. You don't mean it."

"I'm serious," Jane insisted.

"And I'm serious about you not meaning what you're saying right now. You really are on your period, aren't you? You're getting all emotional and we don't do that shit here."

"Mark!" Jane hissed.

"What?" Mark shrugged. "I'm just being stupid like you are."

Jane curled up as best as she could on the beanbag. Her hands became cold and she couldn't believe what she had said earlier. She loved Maura more than she loved life itself, but her frustration and worry were starting to get the best of her. "I'm not ready for this."

"For what?"

"To give up everything you and I had," Jane responded. "I feel like I'm losing my best friend and you're right about me being different. You don't know me anymore and I don't even know myself. We used to have fun, but now my whole life revolves around Maura. She's with me all the time, Mark. Every time I turn around, she's there."

"That's marriage, man," Mark pointed out. "You're going to be with that woman for the rest of your life unless you divorce her."

"I'd never divorce her," Jane snapped.

"Then what the fuck is your problem? You know I can't play guessing games for shit and that's why you always win at Clue." Mark got off his bed to join Jane on the beanbag. The two of them were sitting a little too close for comfort and, when they realized that, they began fighting for a spot on the beanbag. "Jane, is this conversation your way of telling me that you're in love with me? Because if it is, I'm going to have to stop you right now. I don't think you're hideous, but you're just not my type. Scratch that, you're like the only woman in this world who _doesn't _turn me on. Besides, I'm no home-wrecking whore."

"And you wonder why Markie doesn't want to officially be in a relationship with you," Jane brought to his attention. Her statement caught him off guard and with a gentle push, Jane was able to reclaim her spot on the beanbag.

"We're not talking about Markie," Mark commanded.

"We are now," Jane pointed out. "What's with the tone?"

"Nothing!"

"Mark—"

"She thinks she's—she thinks she's pregnant," Mark stammered.

"Markie?" Jane asked in disbelief. "Markie the Safe Sex Queen? That Markie? You're telling me the same girl who gave Maura flavored condoms to use on our first date thinks she's pregnant. You sure she's not just being paranoid?"

"She's not," Mark insisted. "It broke, Jane. It fucking broke. Maybe I didn't put it on right—I don't know. What matters is that it broke, she isn't on the pill, and now she's late. Are girls usually late, Jane? You have to tell me, man. This is when my best friend being a girl pays off."

"I don't know," Jane shrugged. "Maybe a couple of days or a week every now and then. How late is she?"

"Three weeks," Mark responded. When he saw the stunned expression on Jane's face, he held his head in his hands. "I'm fucked, aren't I?"

"No," Jane responded, although she wasn't exactly sure. "When is she taking a test?"

"When she gets back to Boston," Mark informed her. "She wants me there, Jane. I don't even want to be there. Is that bad? Does that make me a fucked up person? Do you think I have to get married now and live some fucking domestic life like you and Maura? She doesn't even want to be my girlfriend yet; how are we supposed to raise a baby together?"

"The same way me and Maura are starting a life together: by working our asses off," Jane insisted.

"We have big boy and big girl problems now," Mark said in an attempt at adding some levity to their conversation. "I'm sorry for saying you were stupid for feeling the way you feel about Maura."

"You have a lot on your mind," Jane said in his defense. "I love Maura and I love nothing more than to be around her, so I'm not sure why I said what I said. What worries me is having to be a provider and you're probably worried about the same thing. Sometimes I just feel as if I don't know what I'm doing. Maura can be very fragile, so I have to be strong for her, but there are times when I really don't know what I'm going to do. And her parents aren't even there for her. I'm afraid of them disowning her or saying something else that's going to hurt her feelings. I love Maura so much and is it wrong that I don't want her to talk to them?"

"It's not wrong," Mark insisted. "Adults can be assholes sometimes."

"Mark, _we're _adults now, too," Jane pointed out. "We're eighteen, so, legally we're adults. I have a wife and you might have a baby on the way."

"Do you think we'll be like them?"

"Like who?"

"Like the people who drive minivans," Mark began. "Do you think I'll have a van full of kids that my wife will have to take to soccer games?"

"Your wife?" Jane asked. "You think there's a woman on this earth who'd want to marry you?"

Mark flipped the beanbag, sending Jane crashing to the floor. "That's what you get," he laughed once he saw her sprawled on the floor. Jane retaliated by pinning him down, but she could only hold him for so long before he flipped her onto her back and held her wrists over her head. She struggled for a bit, but once Mark became fatigued Jane pushed him off and put her full body weight on him.

"Kids?" Mark's mom asked as she knocked on the door. "What are you doing in there? We can hear you downstairs."

"Nothing, Mrs. Higgins," Jane responded as innocently as she could.

"We're just playing Street Fighter…in real life," Mark responded.

She had heard stranger things from the two of them, so she decided to not ask any more questions. "Okay, just don't kill each other. Or should I say Mark, don't let Jane kill you?"

"You're very funny, Mom," Mark responded sarcastically.

They were both sweaty and out of breath by the time they were finished. Jane considered it a victory for her, but Mark insisted that he let her win. Wrestling on the floor with Mark reminded Jane of her carefree days, but the moment they stopped the two of them were brought back to reality.

"What are we going to do?" Mark asked.

"Be there for them," Jane answered. "You're going to call Markie right now and give her all the reassurance that she needs. She's probably scared and unsure of everything and she's going to be scared and unsure until she takes the test, so be there for her until then and keep being there for her even after the results are in."

"You gonna tell Maura?"

"I usually tell Maura everything," Jane pointed out. "But Markie is her best friend, so I'll let her tell Maura. The two of them are going to have a lot to talk about, anyway."

"Jane?"

"What's up?"

"I love you," Mark said as he hugged her. "And we're going to be okay, right?"

"Yeah," Jane responded. "And I love you, too, I guess."

"Jane?"

"What now?"

"You smell like sweat," Mark quipped. "Go home and shower."

"And you think you smell pleasant?" Jane asked defensively. "Do you even wear deodorant?"

"You're a girl," Mark pointed out. "You're supposed to smell like flowers like Markie and Maura and every other girl does."

"I smell like you," Jane answered as she lifted her t-shirt collar up to her nose. "Wrestling made your stench rub off on me. I need to get this off before Maura comes home. Your sweat is like girl-repellant."

"Hey, Jane. Remember this?" When she stood up, he socked her in the back of the knee and nearly knocked her down.

"Damn it, Mark!" Jane fumed. She nearly stumbled, but once she regained her footing she tackled him down to the ground.

"Are you this rough with Maura?" Mark asked as Jane had his hands pinned behind his back. "No tender loving for you, is there?"

"Do you always let women make you their bitch?"

"I didn't know there was a _woman_ on me," Mark struggled to say as he squirmed underneath Jane. "What happened to sugar and spice and everything nice?"

"That's what Maura is made of," Jane blushed. "I—I have to go."

With just minutes until Maura was due to arrive, Jane hurried home so she could get ready. While in her front yard, she picked a flower and brought it inside with her. She didn't have time to get her a card, so she grabbed a sheet of notebook paper and quickly wrote a note to Maura. The note and the flower were taped to the door so they'd be the first things that Maura saw when she got home. Jane knew it wasn't necessary to do so, but she loved her wife for better or worse, for richer or poorer and she wanted to make sure Maura knew how she felt.

_Maura,_

_Marrying you was the best decision I've ever made. _

_Your devoted wife,_

_Jane_

_P.S. I smell like Mark, so I'll probably be in the shower when you get home. Feel free to wait for me on our bed with no clothes on._


	29. Friend Time, Family Time, And Wife Time

**A/N: Thank you so much for the fic love. This story isn't going to get angsty, but our newlyweds need to have SOME disagreements. I hope you enjoy this chapter, though. :)**

* * *

Maura saw the flower and the note that Jane had taped to the door, but instead of appreciating her wife's gesture, she grabbed them and carelessly placed them on top of the box she was holding. Her interview at The Basement hadn't gone according to plan. She had answered the questions as best as she could, but it was a group interview and one of the other girls had outshined Maura. She dressed similar to Mark and Jane and she knew more about music than Maura did. Jerry had talked to Maura after the interview and suggested some other places she might want to apply to, but Maura was far too discouraged to take his advice. She didn't want to work there just for the money; rather, it was yet another way for her to spend time with Jane in a place where Jane felt comfortable. Jane may have married her, but there were still ways in which Maura wanted to feel even more a part of her world.

To cheer herself up, Maura decided to visit her dorm room. Everything about it was still the same besides her empty closet, but it was all so deserted. With Markie in Seattle, Roxie in Santa Monica, and Stash in Alabama, Maura had never felt so alone. If they were in the dorm room with her, they'd all engage in their usual banter or suggest something else that would lift Maura's spirits, but they were all in different parts of the country and they wouldn't be reunited until school started again. She knew exactly what her friends' reactions would be to her not getting the job, but she feared Jane's reaction. If they wanted to get an apartment, they needed Maura to have an income. It was either that or place an even larger burden on Jane.

Before she left her campus, Maura decided to make a stop at the mailroom just in case her Christmas gifts from her parents had arrived early. There was a medium-sized box addressed to her from her parents, but Maura was hesitant to open it, so she carried the box to her car and placed it on the passenger seat. She had debated opening it at home, but her curiosity had gotten the best of her so she opened it while she was all alone in her car. There was a purse and a skirt inside the box, neither of which were Maura's style anymore, but they were both very fashionable nonetheless. They were her style before she met Markie and Jane, but now she found her style becoming more influenced by theirs. _The purse is nice but I'll just give the skirt to Roxie, _Maura thought. _It'd look great on her and I can't just let it go to waste. _There was one more gift left for Maura to open, one that her mother had specifically instructed her to open last. Maura had expected jewelry or something else of great monetary value, but she was pleasantly surprised to find a framed photograph of her and her mother that was taken just days before Maura started college. Maura took a long look at the girl in the picture, the girl she once was. Her hair was different, her makeup was different, her clothes were different—nearly every aspect of her physical appearance was different. Maura also noticed her smile was far less genuine than it was now. Her mother knew nothing about her and when she looked at the label addressed to her, she realized her mother no longer even knew her last name.

There was a letter attached to the back of the frame, which Maura eagerly read. Maura dreaded reading a letter that was short and formal like the letters her mother wrote to her during her adolescence, but after reading the first sentence Maura knew this was going to be different. Her mother wrote about missing her and wishing she had been there for her while Maura was growing up. She wanted a better relationship with Maura, but she knew Maura was now a grown woman with a life of her own. _She doesn't know how grown up_, Maura thought as she read the letter. _Her only daughter is a married woman and she isn't even aware. _The realization made Maura tear up.

* * *

Knowing they would be home alone, Jane walked into her room wearing nothing but basketball shorts and a sports bra. It wasn't the most enticing ensemble she owned, but she wanted to play it casual just in case Maura wasn't in the mood. Hoping that Maura would be in their bed and ready for her, Jane was surprised to find her wife crying instead. Her flower and the note had been carelessly placed on their dresser and, instead, Maura was clutching another piece of paper.

Jane's first instinct was to hold her, but Maura gently pushed her away. "I need to be alone for awhile," Maura insisted.

"Okay," Jane said softly, trying not to sound too hurt. "I'm going to put some pajamas on and then I'll go to the living room until you're ready to see me."

Maura scooted over to where Jane was sitting upright on the bed. Before Jane could get up, Maura reached from behind and wrapped her arms around Jane's waist. She held Jane as closely to her as she could, so she could not only take in Jane's scent but also so she could reassure her wife that she was loved. "Stay with me," Maura whispered into her ear.

"I thought you wanted me to leave," Jane smiled.

Maura rested her head on Jane's shoulder, so she could take in her post-shower scent of lotion and body wash. "Jane, I don't know what I want anymore. I'm worried about our marriage and our future together."

"What about our marriage?" Jane asked worriedly.

"We rushed into this," Maura reminded her. "We don't have a plan, Jane, and I don't think we're completely ready for this. What we wanted was to share a bed, but did we fully take into consideration everything else that comes with being married?"

"We didn't," Jane admitted. "But we went through with it and I'm glad we did. I love you so much, Maura, but trust me when I say that I have the same doubts that you have."

Maura playfully pulled Jane down on the bed with her so that Jane was resting her head on her chest. "I love you. I love you more than I've ever loved anyone, but I worry about failing you as a wife."

"Just as I worry about failing you as a wife and a provider," Jane added.

"You could never fail me."

"And you could never fail me," Jane insisted.

"Don't be so sure," Maura began. "Jerry didn't hire me. He gave the position to another girl."

"And that makes you think you're failing me?" Jane asked in disbelief. "It's going to take a lot for you to actually fail me and there is nothing you could do or say that would make me stop loving you."

"Go Yankees!" Maura quipped.

"Except that," Jane added. "We're going to be okay, Maur. We have somewhere to stay for the time being and I'm going to work on getting a third job. You need to focus on school, anyway. Ma is already ecstatic about having a doctor in the family and I like the sound of Doctor Rizzoli."

"As much as I like the sound of Officer Rizzoli?"

"Maybe even more," Jane teased. "If only I didn't have to wait another three years. We'll be set then. I'll be doing what I've always wanted to do while simultaneously providing for you. Sometimes I feel so helpless, Maur. I want to be older and give you the life you deserve."

"We'll get there someday," Maura insisted. "But it doesn't matter how much money we make. What matters is our love for each other."

"And we really love each other."

"We do," Maura agreed. "I'm so proud of you, Jane. I'm always going to be proud to be your wife, but there are times when I'm going to miss who I was before I was your wife."

Jane lifted her head up so she could look Maura in the eyes. "You miss your friends, don't you?"

"I do," Maura admitted. "And I know you miss Mark. Jane, we love each other, but we don't have to spend every second together to prove our love for each other."

"I'll spend time with Mark when I want and you spend time with the girls when you want," Jane beamed. "And we can still go on dates with each other and have fun with each other. There's friend time and wife time."

"And family time," Maura hesitated. "I got a letter from my mother. It was attached to the back of a framed photo of us."

"What'd it say?" Jane asked. "Is that why you were crying?"

"I miss her," Maura admitted. "That's why I was crying. She wants to be more of a mother to me, but there's so much she doesn't know about the woman I've become and I don't know how to begin telling her. She knows I'm attracted to women and that doesn't bother her, but she doesn't know I'm married or that I'm even in a relationship. She wants to see me before the semester starts, but I'm worried about how she'll react to our marriage and I feel guilty for not telling her."

"Do you want me there with you?"

"No," Maura shook her head. "I need to do this on my own. I want her to get over the initial shock before I introduce the two of you to each other."

"How bad could it be?" Jane asked, but once she remembered how bad her parents' initial reaction was, she kept quiet about the subject. "Maur, I'm glad she wants a better relationship with you. I've never understood how someone wouldn't want to be in your life. I've known since the moment I saw you that I want you in my life forever."

Maura was about to kiss her wife until their kitten decided to make herself comfortable in between them. "Somebody is hungry," Maura said as she playfully scratched the kitten under her chin. When Chrissy started to purr, Maura picked her up and carried her over to the kitchen with Jane in tow.

Jane and Maura couldn't help but smile as they heard the little crunching noises their kitten made as she ate.

"Did we have an argument?" Maura asked.

"I think we did," Jane smiled. "Time to make up?"

"Time to make up," Maura agreed.

Jane lifted her up and sat her down on the table. They knew it was risky, but the risk made it all the more exciting for the two of them. "I want to make love to you," Jane whispered as she positioned herself in between Maura's legs. When Jane gently nibbled on Maura's neck, Maura let out a soft moan. The sound of Maura moaning and the feeling of her tugging at her hair caused both of them to lose track of their surroundings.

"Janie!" Frank Rizzoli shouted to get his daughter's attention.

Jane was too embarrassed to look at her father, so she hid her face in Maura's chest. When she realized that was an even worse decision, she got off of Maura and stood up to face her father, grateful that they were both still fully-clothed save for Jane in her sports bra. "Pop, when did you get home?" Jane asked nervously.

"In between the moaning and the hair pulling," he responded. "Janie, we eat on there. Disinfect the table before your mother gets home."

Maura smiled. "You aren't going to tell her?"

"Consider it a Christmas gift," he told them. "For you and for me. I don't want to hear her go on and on about this. Just don't let me catch you two again."

"Okay, Pop," Jane said, trying not to sound too excited.

"It's all these kids do," Jane heard her dad mutter as he walked away. "I can't keep them off of each other for more than five minutes."

"Jane?"

"Yeah?" Jane laughed into Maura's shoulder.

"We need our own place."

"Soon," Jane agreed. "Very soon."


	30. Little Janie Is All Grown Up

As she did every morning, Maura woke up safely tucked away with Jane in their bed. She slowly turned around to face her wife who was in a deep sleep. A few unruly strands of hair had covered Jane's face and Maura tried, albeit unsuccessfully, to tuck them behind Jane's ear. With every attempt, her curls would return to their original position and Jane's lack of response to the ordeal made Maura start to smile. As much as she wanted to remain in bed with her wife, Maura knew Jane had a shift that started in less than two hours. Jane's alarm clock had already gone off ten minutes ago, but it had failed to wake her up. They hadn't done anything too strenuous the night before, but they had stayed up talking to each other about their future plans now that Maura hadn't gotten hired at The Basement. Nothing had been settled, but they were able to put each other's mind at ease just as they always did.

"Jane?" Maura asked as she gently shook her. "Jane?"

"Hmm?" Jane groaned, but she fell back asleep before Maura could even respond.

In hopes that it would wake her up, Maura playfully nibbled on her earlobe and she wouldn't stop until Jane retaliated. Maura knew she was in for it, but Jane's retaliation was always tickling or kissing, so Maura didn't exactly mind. When all Jane did was open her eyes, Maura knew something was wrong with her wife.

"Babe?"

"I don't feel good," Jane groaned.

Maura put her hand to her wife's forehead. "You aren't warm, but we should take your temperature to be sure. Can Mark cover your shift today?"

"I can go in," Jane insisted, but when she tried to sit up, it was only a matter of seconds before her head hit the pillow again.

"You're staying home," Maura commanded. "I can take care of you."

"You're going to be my doctor?" Jane asked. Her words were becoming slurred and she flashed Maura a goofy grin that Maura would have considered adorable had her wife been feeling better.

"I'm your wife," Maura pointed out. "Of course I'm going to take care of you."

"Do you think it's because we didn't have sex?" Jane mumbled. "It was so cold last night and we didn't have sex to warm up. You always said that sex is good for my immune system and we went one night without it and now I'm sick. What's that tell you?"

"I'm going to call Mark," Maura smiled. Before leaving their bed, she lovingly caressed Jane's cheek. "Do you want the radio on while I'm gone?"

"_Nevermind_," Jane responded.

Maura gave her a confused look. "Nevermind what?"

"No," Jane laughed. "Put on _Nevermind._ It should be in there already."

Maura pushed play on Jane's stereo. The music began to blare from its speakers, so she immediately lowered the volume until it became faint enough for Jane to hear without disturbing the entire Rizzoli household. Maura had every intention of quickly grabbing the cordless phone from the kitchen and walking back to their bedroom, but she inhaled the smell of pancakes the moment she set foot in the kitchen.

"Those smell heavenly," Maura told her mother-in-law who had just gently swatted Tommy's hand with a spatula as he tried to sneak a pancake directly from the pan.

"There's plenty for you and Janie," Angela responded. "Is she awake yet?"

"Jane is ill this morning," Maura informed her. "I'm going to call Mark and ask if he could cover her shift and then I'm going to take care of Jane. Do you have a thermometer? She isn't warm, but I want to take her temperature to be certain."

"I can take care of her," Angela insisted. "I'm her mother."

"And I'm her wife," Maura reminded her.

"And I'm her brother," Tommy added in hopes that it would ease the tension between Angela and Maura. "I know. I know. Tommy, go to the living room."

Angela and Maura remained quiet until they were certain Tommy had made it to the living room to watch TV with Frank and Frankie. Maura dreaded a confrontation with her mother-in-law, but she wanted to be seen as something other than a girl who was just going to be in Jane's life temporarily. Maura meant every word of the vows she spoke to Jane on the day they were married and she wanted to be taken seriously as Jane's wife.

"I know you're her mother," Maura began. "And I have no intention of taking your place in Jane's heart or saying that I love Jane any more than you do, but I love her differently. I'm _in love _with Jane. I know you see us as children, but Jane and I are grown women and we chose to make a lifelong commitment to each other. Jane and I have been married for less than a month, but she has already proven that she could be a good provider. Let me prove this to her…and to you. Let me prove that I could take care of her."

"Maura?"

"Yes?" Maura asked worriedly.

"The thermometer is in the medicine cabinet," Angela informed her. "And Jane likes Gatorade when she's sick. She says orange juice hurts her throat."

"Thank you," Maura smiled. She had wanted to say so much more to express her gratitude, but words escaped her in that moment because all of Maura's focus was on tending to her wife.

"Maura!" they heard Jane call out.

"She's asking for you instead," Angela smiled in return. "I guess my little Janie is all grown up now."

"She'll always be your Janie," Maura pointed out. "Just like she'll always be my Jane. We can share her."

"Deal," Angela said jokingly. She was about to hug Maura, but the sight of Jane standing in the entryway to the kitchen interrupted them.

"I'm not a pizza," Jane brought to their attention. "You can't just share me."

"Why aren't you in bed?" Maura asked, although she was holding Jane so tightly that it would be impossible for her to move.

"I suddenly feel better," Jane responded. "Ma, pile three pancakes on my plate."

"Aren't you forgetting something?" Angela asked.

"And a couple for Maura," Jane added, still unsure of what her mother was talking about.

"You're a grown woman now," Angela reminded her. "You can serve yourself."

"I'll serve her," Maura insisted, but Jane stopped her before she could go anywhere near the pancakes.

"You sit down," Jane commanded before giving her a peck on the lips. "Both of you. I'm serving my two favorite women this morning."

After the entire Rizzoli family had finished eating breakfast, Jane helped her mother and her wife clean up and wash the dishes before getting ready to go to work. Jane had expected the tension between the two of them to last months or maybe even years, so she was pleasantly surprised by how great they were getting along. Without caring how much it would embarrass her, Angela and Maura swapped stories about Jane ranging from Jane's first loose tooth and her first day of junior high to Maura's stories about the night they met and their first kiss.

"I was attracted to her the moment I saw her," Maura told Angela. "And after our first date, I knew she was the one."

"Was she well-mannered?" Angela asked. "Did she treat you with respect? When she left the house that afternoon, I was so worried about how Jane would act on a date. She can be a handful sometimes."

"Ma, I'm right here," Jane reminded her mother, but neither Maura nor Angela paid any attention to what she was saying.

"She was perfect," Maura said dreamily. "She held doors open for me, pulled out my chair, complimented me, and she was interested in getting to know more about me." Maura held up her right wrist to show Angela the wish bracelet. "She tied this bracelet on my wrist that afternoon and I still haven't taken it off although my wish has already come true."

"What did you wish for?" Angela asked, uncertain if she was ready for Maura's answer.

Maura tried to hide how much she was blushing. "I wished for the opportunity to kiss her and we ended up kissing that evening on the bridge. Jane was my first kiss—my first everything and it wasn't long until I fell in love with her."

"It also wasn't long until you married her," Angela added. "But I'm glad you did. I've never seen Jane this happy."

"Thank you," Jane silently mouthed to her mother.

"I'm going to get in the shower," Maura said before kissing Jane. "I'll hurry so you can get in after me and then I'll make your lunch while you're showering. I'm driving you today. You're not riding your skateboard when it's so cold outside."

Jane leaned in for another kiss. "Love you."

"I love you, too," Maura responded.

"Sometimes, I can't believe how lucky I am," Jane said to her mother after Maura had left the kitchen. "I don't know how I did it, but I convinced the most perfect girl ever created to be mine and now I get to spend the rest of my life with her."

"She's everything I've always wanted for you," Angela admitted. "And I think she feels just as lucky as you do."

Jane averted her eyes. "Ma?"

"Yes?"

"I wasn't really sick this morning."

Angela gave her daughter a confused look. "Then why did you—"

"I was giving you the mother-in-law test," Jane interrupted. "You were going to let Maura take care of me and I know that must have been hard for you."

"You should have seen how badly she wanted to be the one to take care of you," Angela informed her.

"Yeah, Maura's like that," Jane smiled. "We try to protect each other and care for each other any way we can and what you said to her really meant a lot to me, so I just wanted to thank you."

"Jane Clementine Rizzoli being polite and grateful?" Angela quipped. "Marriage really _has _changed you."

Jane narrowed her eyes. "I could stop."

Angela hugged her daughter for the first time in weeks. "Go get ready for work."

"Can't," Jane responded. "Maura is in the shower. Unless—"

"Unless what?"

"Unless I can shower with her?" Jane asked hopefully.


	31. Jane And Maura Are Going To Be Okay

**A/N: Thanks for the love and sorry for making you all wait so long. :)**

* * *

For the first time since she began working at The Basement, Jane was apprehensive about walking in the door. When she put her face against the window in an attempt at looking in, she was surprised to find a new girl talking to Jerry. Before Jerry or the new girl could see her, Jane regained her composure, wiped the window, and quietly walked in the door. _That should have been Maura, _Jane thought as she sized up the girl. Jane had imagined the two of them working together as a team just as she hoped they would when they were in their chosen careers. She imagined her and Maura making a house of cassettes and Maura coming up with some amazing new way of organizing merchandise at the store. When there was downtime, they'd talk to each other or listen to music together and, if there was someone trying to shoplift, Jane had every intention of apprehending him or her in a manner that would both please Jerry and impress Maura. Jane knew there was a possibility that she could grow to like this girl or, if not like her, she could at least tolerate her, but no matter who she was working with it would be nowhere near as enjoyable as working with Maura.

Just as she did at the beginning of every shift, Jane clocked in and made herself comfortable behind the counter near the cash register. There were a few customers in the store, but Jerry's son, the assistant manager, was already helping them. Jerry's son Mitchell was eighteen and, for the most part, Jane liked him except when he was flirting with her. She had told him countless times that she only dated women, yet he refused to give up, so when he became a full-time student at Harvard and an absentee assistant manager, Jane was grateful that she'd rarely have to see him.

As she waited for the customers to decide on their purchases, Jane pulled out her wallet and opened it up to a picture of Maura. _I wish she were here. Everything would be better if she were here._

"If who were here?" Mitchell asked.

Jane, completely unaware that she had said that aloud, hurriedly closed her wallet and put in securely in her back pocket. "Maura," she responded. "My _wife_."

"You're not gay, Jane," Mitchell told her as he placed his hand on top of hers. "You just need to find the right guy."

Had she been anywhere other than The Basement, she would have slapped him across the face or twisted his arm behind his back, but with customers and her boss just a few feet away, Jane calmly removed his hand from on top of hers. "I've already found the right _woman_," Jane stressed. "Maura is my wife and, not only do I love her, I'm also very physically attracted to her. I'm not sure what the exact definition of gay is but I think me being a woman and being married to a woman makes me pretty damn gay."

Jane sized him up as he rolled his eyes at her. Mitchell was about her height, but very thin. Jane knew she wasn't exactly a body builder, herself, but there was no doubt in her mind that she could take this guy if need be.

As if on cue, a customer approached the register and Jane was relieved to finally have something work-related to do so she wouldn't have to talk to Mitchell. The transaction was quick, but when that customer walked out the door Jane was surprised to see that Maura had entered. The love of her life was bundled up in jeans, snow boots, and a thick jacket. Her ensemble was completed by the olive green beanie Jane had given her months ago and a pair of Jane's gloves. Her nose had become pink from being out in the cold and Jane wanted nothing more than to hold her close until she warmed up.

"You're so cold," Jane said as she rubbed her nose against Maura's.

"I had to park one block away and walk over here," Maura informed her. "I never expected there to be so many last minute Christmas shoppers in the area."

"You braved the cold just to see me?" Jane asked, her lips just centimeters from Maura's.

Forgetting where they were, Maura closed the gap between them and stole a kiss from Jane. "Jane!" Mitchell called out, causing Jane and Maura to pull away from each other. "You have a customer."

Jane knew fully well that Mitchell could have rung up the customer, himself, but once she saw how he was glaring at her she knew this was about more than a customer waiting to be rung up. Jane may have been making small talk with the customer, but her mind was on the adorable beanie-wearing, red nosed young woman who was looking at her from near the counter.

"I love you," Jane mouthed as her customer was writing out a check.

"I love you more," Maura mouthed in response.

"BCU," Mitchell scoffed once he saw the crewneck sweatshirt Maura was wearing underneath her jacket.

"Which school do you attend?" Maura asked. She had wanted to be polite, but once she realized whom she was talking to, all she wanted to do was slap him for giving Jane a hard time.

"Harvard," he responded.

"Harvard?" Maura asked. "I was going to attend Harvard. I was accepted to their life sciences department, early acceptance, actually, but I turned them down once I received my letter from BCU. Harvard is more of a safety school."

"Harvard is a safety school?" Mitchell asked in disbelief. "I don't believe that you were actually admitted."

"Yes," Maura told him. "Harvard practically courted me. I honestly didn't have to try to get in there. I'm sorry for not introducing myself earlier, but I'm Maura, Maura _Rizzoli_—Jane Rizzoli's wife."

Jane had overheard their entire conversation and had she not already been married to Maura, she knew she would have proposed to her right then and there. _I love this woman_, Jane thought as she smiled at her.

"Jane!" Jerry called out. "I need to talk to you."

Jane took a deep breath before walking over to him. She was unsure of what their talk would be about, but she couldn't help focusing on the worst-case scenario. Was he upset with her? Was he going to fire her for kissing Maura in front of customers? Whatever it was, Jane didn't want to find out.

"Hi, I'm Jane," Jane said as she held out her hand to the new girl who was still standing next to Jerry.

"Bethany," she responded. "But you can call me Buckle. Everyone at school does. It's time for me to clock out. I'll see you later, Jane."

"Later," Jane said nonchalantly. The new girl may have seemed friendly, but Jane wasn't about to let her guard down just yet. _She's still the girl who took the position from Maura._

"She's only sixteen," Jerry informed her once Buckle was clocking out. "I told her some of the ins and outs of this place, but I was hoping you could take her under your wing. She reminds me a lot of you."

"She's nothing like me," Jane responded as she glanced at the girl who was wearing ripped jeans and an oversized thermal. When she grabbed a skateboard and tied her unruly hair in a ponytail, Jane realized there might have been some truth in what Jerry had told her. "Okay, so she's _kind of _like me. She's still perky, though. It's like the weight of the world has yet to crush her spirit."

"What is it with you Gen X-ers?" Jerry asked as he shook his head. "I think it's that damn music you listen to. And I'm sure she'll learn your patented brand of Jane Rizzoli sarcasm before long."

"My sarcasm is an art, Jerry," Jane began. "I so finely craft my insults and—"

"Jane, shut up," Jerry interrupted. "There's a reason I called you over. I love my son, but I don't want him here. He complains too much, he doesn't want to do anything, and—let's face it—he focuses more on himself than the job, which is why I fired him under false pretenses."

"False pretenses?" Jane asked.

"I told him he should concentrate on school instead of working full time," Jerry said nonchalantly. "Not like he ever shows up here to begin with."

"Nice cover up," Jane responded.

"Anyway," Jerry continued. "I'm going to need another assistant manager—someone who knows this place inside and out, someone who is a hard worker, maybe someone who just got married and needs a full time job so she could get an apartment and support her wife."

"Me?" Jane asked in disbelief.

"Is there another married teenager on my payroll?"

"No," Jane beamed. "Thank you! You don't know how much this means to me. Maura and I are going to be okay. We're actually going to be okay. I can get an apartment for us and pay the bills and buy groceries and—"

"And this is why I'm giving you the position," Jerry pointed out. "You're a hard worker, Jane, and you're dedicated. You're dedicated to your job, but you're especially dedicated to your wife."

"Can I tell her?" Jane asked. "It's going to be a huge weight off her shoulders, too."

Jerry affectionately put a hand on Jane's shoulder. "She already knows. Why do you think she's here?"

Jane turned around to see Maura smiling at her. "She's having a hard time containing her excitement," Jane told him. "Can I go give her a hug?"

"I'll tell you what," Jerry smiled. "Take the rest of the night off to go celebrate with her. It's my Christmas gift to you, but I want you to report back bright and early on the 26th."

"Yes, sir," Jane responded. "Thank you!"

After Jane clocked out and gathered her belongings, the two of them walked outside hand-in-hand. She had thought about giving her a hug, but instead Jane lifted her up and spun her around until Maura couldn't stop giggling. "We're going to be okay!" Jane told her.

"I always knew we would be," Maura said once Jane had stopped spinning and began to cradle her. "I never stopped believing in you, Jane."

As the snow lightly began to fall, Jane carried Maura to a nearby coffee shop to buy something warm for her to drink. People stared at the two of them as they passed by, but they were too wrapped up in each other to notice. There were still two days left until Christmas, but Jane felt as if she had already received everything she could ever ask for. She was holding the love of her life and she was filled with so much hope for their future.


	32. All I Want For Christmas Is You

**A/N: Sorry about the delay, but writer's block got the best of me. :(**

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Jane looked at her wife sitting on the bedroom floor with their kitten. Chrissy was full of energy that night, so Maura had looked through their room for anything that could be used as a toy for their kitten. She found a small, rubber ball and, although she was worried about Chrissy biting off pieces of the ball, she knew there was nothing else she could use as a toy unless she gave Chrissy her Christmas present early.

"Jane, what if she bites off a piece of rubber?" Maura asked worriedly.

"She's fine, Maur," Jane responded, her voice slightly raised. When Chrissy heard Jane's voice, she jumped onto the bed and made herself comfortable on Jane's chest.

Maura scooted closer to the bed and grabbed their kitten. "Stay off of Mommy Jane," she said in a sweet voice. "She doesn't want us touching her right now."

Maura had hoped for some type of response from Jane, but there was only silence until Jane got out of bed to turn on the radio. There was nothing but commercials and songs that annoyed her, so she angrily shut it off and went back to bed.

"There's mix tapes," Maura pointed out. "Let's listen to the Christmas tape I made for you right before we were married. It's Christmas Eve and we should be—"

"I hate that tape," Jane interrupted.

Maura averted her eyes. "Oh." She wasn't sure what had come over her wife, but her mood had changed drastically since the day before when they had celebrated her promotion. Maura wanted to comfort her, but after that outburst about the tape, Maura felt as if she should keep her distance.

Jane's heart nearly broke when she looked at her crying wife. Her mood had nothing to do with Maura and the moment Maura's tears began to fall, Jane felt as if she had already broken one of their vows. Until that moment, she could never fathom making Maura cry but there she was crying into her sleeve as Chrissy batted the rubber ball back and forth in front of her, just waiting for Maura to play with her again.

Instead of hugging Maura, Jane made her way over to the stereo and popped in the Christmas mix tape Maura had made for her. The first song to play was "All I Want For Christmas Is You." Jane didn't particularly care for that song, but she knew that Maura loved that song for more than just the lyrics and the melody. It was played on the radio nearly every hour for the past month and during the short amount of time between Thanksgiving and the start of winter break, Maura and Roxie had managed to learn every word of the song. They'd sing it to each other, they'd dance to it on Roxie's bed, and they even dedicated it to Jane and Stash on the radio.

Hearing the song did little to change Maura's disposition, so Jane decided to do something drastic. She remembered less than half of the lyrics, but what she didn't know she improvised as she sang to Maura. When it was time for the chorus, Jane wrapped her arms around Maura and became even more playful with her singing.

"Jane, stop," Maura commanded.

"_All I want for Christmas is you_," Jane continued to sing.

"Stop it, Jane!" Maura said as she gently pushed her away. "Singing to me isn't going to make it better."

"Maybe not," Jane smiled. "But I know what will."

Jane grabbed a small envelope from on top of the dresser and handed it to Maura. In the midst of celebrating Jane's promotion, the two of them had forgotten about the mail that Angela had placed in their bedroom.

"It's from Markie!" Maura said as she excitedly tore open the envelope. Two weeks had passed since she had heard from her friends and, although Maura missed them, she knew their families missed them even more and she hoped they were all enjoying the holiday season as much as she was.

The front of the card displayed a decapitated snowman and Jane could hardly contain her laughter. "Mark is starting to rub off on her."

"Should I be afraid?" Maura asked. "Jane, you could read it with me if you'd like."

The card served as a peace offering for the two of them and Jane was grateful that her wife was smiling again even if she wasn't the one putting a smile on her face. Maura had said she could read the card with her, so Jane took it as an invitation to hold her. As Maura sat on the floor, Jane wedged herself between the bed and Maura and wrapped her arms around her wife's waist. She wasn't too concerned with what the card said so her focus shifted to delicately placing kisses on the back of Maura's neck.

"_Dort,_"Maura read. "_The girls and I might be returning to Boston sooner than expected because we miss you. Oh, and Merry Christmas._"

"You're smiling," Jane said before nibbling on her earlobe. She knew Markie was hiding something from her, but Jane felt as if she was in no position to tell Maura about the possibility of her best friend being pregnant. Mark wasn't supposed to tell Jane, so by telling Maura she would be causing a rift in the already rocky relationship or _almost _relationship that Mark and Markie were in.

"I love you," Maura began, her words bringing Jane out of a daze. "I know you love me, too, but sometimes I feel like I'm a burden on you."

"You're not a burden and you never will be," Jane reassured her. "Maura, you're my life and, I've said this dozens of times, but I'd do anything for you. I know I was upset earlier, but it wasn't because of you and I shouldn't have taken it out on you. I love the Christmas tape. I love it even more so because you made it the week we were married. I'm going through a difficult time right now. I'm trying to be your wife and my mom's daughter all at the same time and I feel like I'm being torn apart. I'm losing Jane in the process."

Maura turned around to face her wife. She had planned on looking her directly in the eyes during their conversation, but Jane pulled her in so Maura could rest her head on her shoulder. "What does _Jane_ want?" Maura asked.

"Jane—I mean, _I _want _you_," Jane said as she stroked Maura's back. "I want to tell everyone that I'm a married woman and my wife is now my priority, but every time I try I feel as if nobody takes me seriously. Mark and my brothers take me seriously—as seriously as the three of them could get, which probably isn't saying much. Jerry takes me seriously, too, but sometimes I feel as if my parents think this marriage is a phase and that you and I are just kids who don't know what we're doing."

"We _don't _know what we're doing," Maura smiled.

"I know we don't," Jane agreed. "But they should let us figure it out for ourselves and respect the fact that, yes, I'm still a member of the Rizzoli family, but I'm also married and you and I are branching out into our own little family. If I don't want to go to my grandparents' house for Christmas dinner, I shouldn't have to."

"Is that what this is about?" Maura asked. Once she felt how tense her wife was becoming, she knew there was more to this than wanting to branch out. "Jane, you can talk to me."

"I'll be okay," Jane insisted, but when she remembered how important communication was in a marriage, she decided to confide in her wife. "The whole family is going to visit my grandparents tomorrow and I told my parents that I'm not going. It's our first Christmas together and I don't want to remember it as the day I came out to them and was ridiculed for an entire evening. They're not going to accept us, Maur, and I don't want to put you through that. You don't deserve to hear their name-calling. I'll tell them eventually, but not on Christmas. I want to make tomorrow a perfect day for you. You told me that Christmases with your parents were never memorable and you'd spend most of the day in your room. I want to change that and I want you to have a Christmas full of surprises. You might spend some of it in the bedroom but that's only when we—"

"Jane!"

"What?" Jane smirked. "Since it's Christmas and we'll be home alone, you can pose seductively under the Christmas tree while wearing nothing but a—"

"No," Maura interrupted, although she wasn't exactly against what Jane had suggested. "How many times have we been caught? When we make love tomorrow, it'll be in our room."

Jane pretended to be disappointed, but she was already looking forward to making love to Maura regardless of what room they'd be in.

Later that night, Maura woke up to find an empty space next to her in bed. She waited impatiently for Jane to return but, after ten minutes had passed and she was still alone, Maura quietly crept downstairs to the living room. Standing next to the fireplace was her wife with a couple of small, wrapped gifts in her hand. Maura didn't want to peek and risk ruining her surprise, but she couldn't turn away from the sight of her wife filling her stocking with gifts. Their first Christmas had barely begun and Jane was already making it special for her.


	33. Merry First Christmas Together

**A/N: Sorry about the delay in updates, but I'd like to say an extra special thank you to those who have decided to stick with this story. :)**

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Christmas with the Rizzoli family was unlike anything Maura had ever experienced. As she did every morning, Maura expected to feel her wife's arms wrapped around her and their kitten fast asleep at the foot of their bed, but when she woke up she saw neither Chrissy nor Jane in the room with her. She listened to the sound of her new family talking downstairs and, for a while, she considered joining them, but she worried about imposing on any family traditions.

Maura looked at her pajamas sprawled in a messy pile on the floor. Jane had taken them off of her the previous night along with her own and carelessly tossed them aside. Although she had seen Jane place small gifts in her stocking, she had pretended to be asleep when Jane returned.

"I know you're awake," Jane pointed out. "You can't lie to me, Maura."

It was Maura who had initiated their kissing, but Jane who wanted to take it to the next level. She was more attentive to her than ever before and her focus was on Maura's pleasure before her own. Jane had promised her a better marriage and she had every intention of keeping her promise. They were going to communicate more and argue less. They were going to be each other's priority and not let anybody get in between them whether it was their friends or their family. Jane and Maura were young, but they were already branching out into their own little family and Jane wanted to be as nurturing to her wife as she could possibly be.

Before Maura could put her pajamas on, Jane barged into their room with a candy cane in hand. "Merry First Christmas Together, Maurwife. I brought you a candy cane."

Her excitement to see Jane made her forget that her pajamas were still on the floor as she got up to hug her wife. "Merry First Christmas Together, Janewife. I love you."

Jane handed the candy cane over to Maura and lifted her up. "You should greet me naked every morning for the rest of our lives."

"Bring me a candy cane and I will."

"That's all it takes?"

Maura was going to make a comment about not being bought so easily, but while holding her Jane slipped on Maura's pajamas and sent them both tumbling onto their bed.

"You did that on purpose," Jane pointed out. "You strategically placed your pajamas there so I could land on top of you."

"And nearly smash me in the process," Maura added. The placement of her pajamas was far from strategic, but now that she had her wife on her she didn't want to let her go.

Jane pretended to wiggle free, but Maura knew she didn't want her to let go either. "I like you naked."

Maura twirled a strand of Jane's dark hair around her finger. "I know you do."

"But you can't be naked for long," Jane mumbled. "You have presents to open."

Maura had opened the presents her parents had sent her, but she hadn't expected any gifts from her new family. Mr. and Mrs. Rizzoli had given her a home and, most importantly, they had given her Jane. Their daughter's hand in marriage was more than enough, but Frank and Angela wanted Maura to feel like one of the family.

The word presents brought out the child in Maura and she put her pajamas on as quickly as she could. For the first time in her life, Maura ran downstairs on Christmas morning and felt so much warmth and comfort. Instead of the uncomfortable silence or constant nitpicking she experienced with her parents, Maura saw the entire Rizzoli family save for Jane talking and laughing and opening their gifts.

"Way to wait for us," Jane said sarcastically.

"You're eighteen and a married woman now," Angela pointed out. "We thought you'd consider yourself too cool to open presents with your family."

"Jane's not too cool for anything," Tommy chimed in.

"Jane's not even cool," Frankie added.

Jane wrapped her arms around Maura from behind. "I don't care because every morning I get to wake up next to this beautiful girl and you two don't even have girlfriends."

"I still don't think this is real," Tommy turned to say to Angela. "Jane couldn't get a date all throughout high school and then she suddenly meets a girl—a hot girl at that—and this hot girl marries her. I think she's paying Maura."

Maura knew her wife was going to come up with a sarcastic comment or an insult that would lead to even more banter between her and Tommy, but instead Jane held her even closer and kissed her cheek. "She's not paying me," Maura responded. "I love Jane and I love _loving _Jane."

"Gross," Tommy shook his head. "Jane's supposed to say something and I'm supposed to say something back. It's a thing we have."

"Tommy, just open your presents," Jane said between sharing kisses with Maura.

"I love you," Maura whispered into Jane's ear.

Jane responded by lifting her up and carrying her over to the couch. She knew their playfulness and displays of affection weren't what the Rizzoli family was used to seeing from Jane, but they were grateful that Jane's attitude had changed. In the months since she had met Maura, Jane had grown up and accepted more responsibilities and, most importantly, she was the happiest her parents had ever seen her.

Jane had expected individual gifts; a knitted sweater or a cute handbag for Maura and maybe some CDs or video games for herself, but when they were handed a present labeled, 'Jane and Maura' Jane became hesitant to open it.

"This box is too big to be CDs or video games," Jane pointed out. "Unless it's a new console."

Maura playfully pinched her wife. "Jane."

Hoping for the best, Jane ripped through the wrapping paper and revealed a boxed set of plates, bowls, and mugs. "Dishes," Jane groaned.

Maura took the box from her wife. "We have a set of dishes now!"

"Is this a hint, Ma?" Jane quipped. "You want us gone already?"

Angela gave her daughter a confused look. "Didn't Maura tell you?"

"What was Maura supposed to tell me?"

"It's about your gift," Maura explained. "Your gift that I was going to give you when we're alone." Maura noticed Jane's cheeks start to redden. "No, no, Jane. It's not sex. It's an actual gift. Not that making love isn't a gift for both of us but—"

Jane put her hand over her wife's mouth. "She's just joking," she said to her family.

"It's _Maura_," Tommy emphasized. "She's not joking."

"How about you open the present from the four of us?" Jane suggested to her parents in hopes of changing the subject.

The gift Frank and Angela opened was the framed portrait of the four of them dressed as Rambo. Out of every Christmas portrait they had ever taken, this was without a doubt Jane's favorite. Maura fit in so well with the three of them and she hoped this was only the first portrait out of the many they'd pose for in the future. Jane even debated letting Maura choose next year's theme, but when her wife reacted so excitedly to the book about tortoises that Frank and Angela had given her, she decided picking the theme herself would be their best bet.

"Jane, can we get a tortoise?" Maura asked as she showed Jane a picture of a tortoise in her book.

"Ma, look what you started by getting her this book." Jane tried to be upset, but she just held onto her wife's hand and knew it would only be a matter of time before they had a kitten _and _a tortoise.

As much as Jane liked spending Christmas with her parents and her brothers, she couldn't wait for them to leave so she could be alone with Maura. Jane didn't have anything too exciting planned for the two of them, but it was the first time Maura had a stocking and she wanted to see the look on her face when she opened each little gift she had chosen for her.

"Chrissy should open hers first," Maura suggested.

"Yeah," Jane agreed. "The kids always open their gifts first."

The gifts they had purchased for her were a new ball of yarn, cat treats, and a new ball. Chrissy's gifts were placed in a stocking and she managed to squeeze herself into the stocking and pull out her new ball. When she began to bat it back and forth between her paws, Jane and Maura knew they had chosen the right gifts for her. Their little kitten was going to be entertained for hours and just watching her was entertaining them, too.

"I want you to open yours first," Maura insisted.

"I'll open one and then you open your stocking."

Jane tore through the wrapping paper of her gift and saw that her wife had bought her a Game Boy Pocket and a couple of games for it. Jane's eyes shifted between the Game Boy and her wife and she had a sudden urge to kiss her wife. Instead of a single kiss, Jane playfully tackled Maura and repeatedly kissed her on the cheek. "You beautiful woman," she said as Maura giggled. "How did you know?"

"Jane," Maura began. "You showed me the advertisement in the magazine everyday and said, 'It fits in your pocket. They shrank it so it could fit in your pocket.' You weren't exactly subtle."

"Let's test it," Jane said as she grabbed the box and gave Maura a chance to sit up. Like she had hoped, the Game Boy fit perfectly in the pocket of her jeans. "Maur, it fits!"

Christmas was bringing out the child-like side of her wife, which made Maura feel as if she could fall in love with Jane all over again. She was grateful for everything Jane had done for her, but mostly for the chance to spend the rest of her life with Jane and celebrate every holiday together.

"Open yours," Jane insisted.

The gifts Jane had chosen for her were small, but meaningful. Inside was Maura's favorite shade of lipstick, a mix tape of the songs she listened to when she was with her friends, and a personalized compact mirror.

"I made the mirror," Jane bragged. "Well I didn't _make _the mirror, but I decorated it. Open it up."

Maura opened the mirror and instead of seeing her reflection, she saw a note attached. "_You're beautiful_ _just the way you are_," Maura read aloud.

"In case you ever need a reminder," Jane smiled.

"I love it…and you," Maura blushed. "How did you know about the songs I listen to with the girls?"

"I listen to you sometimes," Jane teased. "I know how much you miss your friends and this way you can have something to remind you of the good times you have with them. I made tapes for the three of them, too."

Maura felt the tears start to pool in the corners of her eyes. "Jane."

"No crying," Jane insisted. "If you cry, then I'll cry and we'll both be a mess."

"I won't cry if you open your next present," Maura insisted. She grabbed a small box from next to Chrissy's stocking and handed it to Jane. "I hope you like it more than the Game Boy."

"The Game Boy is hard to top," Jane told her. "Unless, inside this box is a tiny piece of lingerie that you plan on wearing tonight."

"Jane," Maura rolled her eyes.

"Maura," Jane mimicked.

"Open it."

Jane opened the box to reveal a single key. She tried to figure out its meaning, was it symbolic or was it a key that opened something, Jane wasn't sure. "Is this the key to your heart?" Jane asked.

"No," Maura smiled. "It's the key to our new apartment. We were approved for family housing. It's a special section of BCU student housing reserved for married students and students with children. We can move in at the start of the semester."

"We have a place?" Jane asked in disbelief. "We actually have a place?"

"We have a place," Maura reassured her. "Does that top the Game Boy?"

"A little," Jane teased.

After Maura opened her next present, the two of them spent the rest of the afternoon playing with Chrissy before going outside to play in the snow. They felt like children again and as they looked at Christmas lights while walking hand-in-hand that night, both Jane and Maura felt so fortunate that this was only the first of many Christmases they'd spend together.


End file.
